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Few of us can boast that their childhood dreams have come true. This is because with age we become overly critical and forbid ourselves to think about the impossible. SHAPE explains how to learn to realize your dreams.

Dreaming is healthy and very important. If we don't dream, we are marking time. After all, dreams are an impulse, a call to action, a stimulus for development. But provided that they are yours, and not your parents, boyfriend or best friend. The main thing that prevents us from dreaming is that we are too concerned with the opinions of others, instead of concentrating on own desires. Disbelief in own strength or hope for luck makes a person helpless. Thus, successful people spend more than 70% of their free time thinking about the future, but unsuccessful people, on the contrary, remember past events 90% of the time.

Action plan

More often than not, we focus on what we don't have or what we don't want, instead of focusing our energy on what we want. Think positively!

Fantasize

In order for a dream to come true, it must be imagined - not abstractly, but in the smallest detail. Professional athletes master this technique like no one else. “A dream is a product of our imagination. And it - main tool consciousness. It is with the help of imagination that consciousness builds a picture of a better future,” says Russian Tennis Federation psychologist ANNA SAMOKHINA. Our brain, like a computer, works with the data we give it. If you consider yourself not the smartest, the most beautiful and the most athletic, then the result will be appropriate. Without seeing the goal of the path, you will not be able to choose the right direction. Clinical psychologist from Johannesburg NEIL SO advises learning to think in new ways. "Try using right hemisphere brain responsible for imagination. And only him. For example, when you imagine that you live in a luxurious house by the sea (right hemisphere), your logic ( left hemisphere) immediately objects: “It costs hellish millions!”

Action plan. At this moment, you need to drown out the voice of reason and allow your imagination to develop on its own. Once you have imagined your dream in all its details, you can use logic again. Now let her decide how to achieve all this.

Exercise

Imagination can be developed with the help of the most simple exercises: - together with younger brother, sister or own child draw, sculpt, dance, write fairy tales - in a word, do whatever you want; - do everything that gives you truly childish delight (or try to feel how it could be); - turn to your inner “child”. American psychoanalyst ERIC BYRNE created the theory of three ego states, according to which a “child”, “parent” and “adult” live in each of us. "Child" is yours Creative skills. Periodically allow him to freely express his favorite “I want!”, without thinking that it is “not allowed”, “at the wrong time” or “expensive”.

WHAT CAN HINDER YOUR DREAMS FROM REALIZING?

• Other people's dreams (imposed by relatives or society). If “processing” occurs from childhood, then a person may not even realize that these dreams are someone else’s, and take them for his own. For example, a mother wanted her daughter to become a pianist, and she really became one, but in this way it was not her dream that came true, but her mother’s.
• Various kinds losses, such as illness or death of someone significant.
• A bad experience can discourage you from striving for anything (if something doesn’t work out many times, apathy sets in - and it seems like you didn’t really want to).
• Destructive parental attitudes: “this is unrealistic”, “you won’t succeed” - all this can significantly interfere with our desires and dreams!

CONVINCE YOURSELF

There is nothing more correct than positive thinking. Stand in front of the mirror and remind yourself that you were born a winner. After all, this is what you thought as a child, and this is why every dream seemed achievable. Athletes often benefit from triggers—victory cries that set them up for success (think “Fort Boyard”). Triggers can be unusual, funny and even naive! “They return the athlete to a state of confidence and mobilization when he is excited and anxious,” says the master of sports in athletics OLGA SENATOROVA. “Living into favorable images forms the will to win through the mechanism of associative connection.” Effective methods Gestalt therapy also offers work with dreams: imagine the dream in all its details and always in the present tense. Then say it out loud, or better yet, write it down on paper to compare the results in the future.

Action plan. Be attentive to the feelings that this or that fact evokes in you during visualization. For example, “I was made the head of a department: I’m surprised and happy at the same time, I’m planning to buy a car, I really want to send SMS to my friends.” If your dream involves someone else, it can be helpful to speak or write it out on behalf of everyone involved.

“Try to fulfill even your small desires, because a fulfilled desire improves your mood and gives additional energy, joy of life...” - Paulo Coelho.

REDUCE RISKS

Very often our fears prevent us from achieving our dreams. Psychologists distinguish between moving forward based on the fear of looking unworthy and making a mistake, and from the desire for success. Only the latter leads to achieving your dreams. “Any development is impossible without overcoming difficulties,” Anna Samokhina is sure. “It is these “bumps on the road” that spur us on, forcing us to go even harder towards what we want!” Very often we put off achieving our dreams until better times, when we lose weight, find interesting work or ideal man... Neil Tuck warns: with this approach, this time may never come.

Action plan. Move towards your goal in small but clear steps. Imagine the worst thing that can happen at each stage. And calm down - most things are reversible!

NE FEAR SUCCESS

“The winner is always the one who prepared best,” says Olga Senatorova. - For example, I studied more carefully the strengths and weak sides opponent, calculated everything better possible options the upcoming struggle. But I note that the winner is also a person with nerves of steel who knows how to implement the plan! Calmly working according to the schedule, as if in training, he will not allow himself to relax for a second, stumble, he will give everything that he is truly capable of - and make his dream come true!” However, we should not forget that victory must be followed by new victory, and behind the achieved dream there is another dream that also requires implementation. IN otherwise you will have to experience all the horror of what psychologists call goal achievement syndrome... When what you have dreamed of for so long comes true, an emptiness forms in your soul. At this moment, a crisis or even depression may well begin.

Action plan. Unfortunately, the mechanism of our motivation is such that if there is no tasty morsel ahead, it means there is nothing to strive for, life is not interesting. Therefore, it is better when dreams are large-scale, involving the implementation of several stages.

Approach every task as if the possibilities are unlimited. This should become a habit.

DREAM THE IMPOSSIBLE

It is also very important to maintain a balance between dreams and reality. Sometimes a person is completely immersed in dreams and... The perception of reality is distorted: he begins to perceive the world through the prism of your own fantasies. A striking example- the state of being in love: a lover always sees not real person, but projections that he himself “directs” to the object of his dreams. “You may be surprised, but there are dreams that should not become reality,” says Anna Samokhina, “and this is their main advantage. Because it is thanks to our dreams that we have certain qualities, such as determination and perseverance, and can endlessly experience whole line the bright emotions we need.” Not every dream can be achieved, and our life does not always look like a wonderful dream, but our self-confidence can turn every day into a holiday.

7 RULES FOR SUCCESSFUL REALIZATION OF YOUR DREAM

1. Learn to separate your own desires from the goals that others persistently dictate to you.
2. Understand the concepts of “dream” and “goal”, so that there is no confusion. A goal is certain steps that help you get closer to your dream. A dream is something desired that cannot be achieved quickly.
3. Set your priorities. It is important to feel what exactly you want, even if it takes a long time.
4. Compete with yourself for success. A little competition is always good. The main thing is not to compete with others, otherwise the realization of your dream can easily fade into the background.
5. Find your resource state. Pay attention to what pleases you most: moments, places where you truly feel good. Try to mentally linger on pleasant moments, as if photographing them (the most important thing is to create and remember the image in detail). And if the path to your dream is suddenly blocked by stress, fear or depression, close your eyes and for a few minutes “return” to those moments where you felt so good.
6. Control your body Avoid overexertion. Even in stressful situations try to keep your breathing even and moderately deep. This way you can regain your strength faster.
7. Take up auto training. When you say “I can’t,” think about whether it really is so. And replace it with “I can.” This is how you turn on the programming mechanism for success. When you set your psyche to be positive, your body starts biochemical processes, which usually occur when you are happy.

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Do you dream of getting Nobel Prize, fly into space or buy a house on the islands? Thought is material, you just need to want it very much, esotericists believe. According to rationalists, in order for dreams to come true, it is necessary to act. By uniting various techniques to achieve what you want, we offer an algorithm for realizing your dreams in 12 steps.

1. Be clear about what you want.
You need to understand what you really want. Perhaps, while dreaming of a sports car, deep down you just want to please women. Desires should come from you, and not be imposed by parents or advertising. Think about what you will do if tomorrow you win a million dollars in the lottery or find out that you have six months to live? What would you wish for a genie if you had just one wish? Answer quickly, in 1-2 minutes, and then your subconscious mind will highlight the main thing itself.

2. Write it down
Write down in detail all the characteristics and qualities that your dream should have. Thus, fantasies acquire specific forms and become more real for your own subconscious, that is, the dream turns into a goal. Writing your purpose deepens your belief in own capabilities and includes a mechanism for achieving success.

3. Find and neutralize the internal enemy
If you want to become a millionaire, but are afraid that wealth will not bring you happiness in personal life, then your dream is unlikely to come true, because you yourself are blocking it. Write down all the doubts that come to you: “Why can’t I have a house in the Canaries (can’t be a TV presenter, etc.)?”, “I’m afraid that if I have my own business (get married, etc.), That…". Bring out hidden fears, find internal prohibitions. Analyze what stands in your way - guilt, fear of disappointment, self-pity, the desire to avoid responsibility.

4. Think positively. Cast aside your doubts
Having found negative beliefs that block your dreams, transform them into positive ones. Use affirmative sentences in describing your future achievements. Repeat out loud or write down on paper: “I am talented and will write a book,” “My wife will support all my endeavors.” Think in in a positive way: Drop the "NOT" particle.

You must firmly believe that your dream will come true. Wait, don't hope. Doubts and anxiety take away the strength that will be needed to overcome one’s own inertia and external obstacles. Absolute belief in the achievability of a goal, on the contrary, activates hidden abilities And internal potential. Thanks to positive thinking- I deserve it, I can do it, I will get it - you will set yourself up for success.

5. What's at the start?
Define your initial position. If you dream of a prince on a white horse, take a sober look at yourself in the mirror. If you're thinking about own business, evaluate your education, start-up capital, research the market. Assess how your current situation matches what you are striving for. This will be the starting point.

6. What separates you from your dream?
If you are waiting for a prince on a white horse, it's time to understand what you need to become a princess that someone can fall in love with blue bloods. Make a list of all the obstacles standing between you and your dream. They can be both external and internal. Honestly ask yourself: “What should I change in myself, what should I learn to achieve my dreams? What conditions are necessary for the materialization of desire?

7. Find helpers
Announce your plans loudly. Identify a circle of people who can help you or will be useful. Communicate with those who have already achieved what you dream of, or know how to do it.

8. Set deadlines
Install deadline to realize the goal. Thus, you program its achievement in your mind and turn on the mechanism of intensifying efforts. If your dream does not meet the deadline, install a new one - it means that you simply made an overly optimistic forecast. It is more realistic to earn a million dollars in 10 years than in 1 month. Healthy long term goal break down into several short-term subgoals.

9. Make a plan
Now that you have completed everything previous points, you have a clear idea of ​​what you want, what obstacles you have to overcome and who can help you. Now you need to compose detailed plan achieving the goal. Write down a list of all your activities in order of priority and chronology.

10. "Back to the Future"
Many new wave psychologists and esotericists talk about the creative power of visualization. Now that you know what characteristics the desired thing should have (money, relationships, qualities, position, etc.), imagine that it is already in your life. Imagine in the most detailed detail the furnishings of your dream home, right down to the upholstery of the sofa and the rug in the bathroom, walk through the rooms. Imagine communicating with your loved one, how you prepare dinner together or talk until the morning.

Play your imaginary “movie” over and over again. In this way, you increase the power of your thinking and begin to attract the people, ideas and opportunities you need to achieve your goals. It’s as if you are attracting your dream.

11. Don't give up
Achieving big goals can take weeks, months, or years of hard work. Obstacles and difficulties will seem insurmountable. Don't even think about failure and don't give up. Every day, do something that brings you closer to your dream. Yours desire, a firm belief in the achievability of the goal, as well as perseverance and perseverance will definitely lead to success.

12. Learn to be happy with what you have
And finally magical secret. Your dream will come true if you can do just fine without the desired object. Let your dream go free, don’t make it the only meaning of life, and be grateful for what fate has already rewarded you with. Enjoy the process of turning your dreams into reality, because this is life.

Do you dream of winning a Nobel Prize, flying into space or buying a house on the islands? Thought is material, you just need to want it very much, esotericists believe. According to rationalists, in order for dreams to come true, it is necessary to act. Combining various techniques for achieving what you want, we offer an algorithm for realizing your dreams in 12 steps.

1. Be clear about what you want.

You need to understand what you really want. Perhaps, while dreaming of a sports car, deep down you just want to please women. Desires should come from you, and not be imposed by parents or advertising. Think about what you will do if tomorrow you win a million dollars in the lottery or find out that you have six months to live? What would you wish for a genie if you had just one wish? Answer quickly, in 1-2 minutes, and then your subconscious mind will highlight the main thing itself.

2. Write it down

Write down in detail all the characteristics and qualities that your dream should have. Thus, fantasies take on specific forms and become more real to your own subconscious, that is, the dream turns into. Writing a goal deepens your belief in your own capabilities and turns on the mechanism.

3. Find and neutralize the internal enemy

If you want to become a millionaire, but are afraid that wealth will not bring you happiness in your personal life, then your dream is unlikely to come true because you yourself are blocking it. Write down all the doubts that come to you: “Why can’t I have a house in the Canaries (can’t be a TV presenter, etc.)?”, “I’m afraid that if I have my own business (get married, etc.), That…". Bring out hidden fears, find internal prohibitions. Analyze what stands in your way - guilt, fear of disappointment, self-pity, the desire to avoid responsibility.

4. Think positively. Cast aside your doubts

Once you find the negative beliefs that are blocking your dreams, transform them into positive ones. Use affirmative sentences when describing your future accomplishments. Repeat out loud or write down on paper: “I am talented and will write a book,” “My wife will support all my endeavors.” Think in a positive way: drop the “NOT” particle.

You must firmly believe that your dream will come true. Wait, don't hope. Doubts and anxiety take away the strength you need to overcome your own inertia and external obstacles. Absolute faith in the achievability of a goal, on the contrary, activates hidden abilities and inner potential. By thinking positively - I deserve this, I can do this, I will get this - you will set yourself up for success.

5. What's at the start?

Determine your starting position. If you dream of a prince on a white horse, take a sober look at yourself in the mirror. If you are thinking about your own business, evaluate your education, start-up capital, and research the market. Assess how your current situation matches what you are striving for. This will be the starting point.

6. What separates you from your dream?

If you are waiting, it's time to understand what you need to become a princess with whom a blue-blooded person can fall in love. Make a list of all the obstacles standing between you and your dream. They can be both external and internal. Honestly ask yourself: “What should I change in myself, what should I learn to achieve my dreams? What conditions are necessary for the materialization of desire?

7. Find helpers

Announce your plans loudly. Identify a circle of people who can help you or will be useful. Communicate with those who have already achieved what you dream of, or know how to do it.

8. Set deadlines

Set a deadline for achieving the goal. Thus, you program its achievement in your mind and turn on the mechanism of intensifying efforts. If your dream does not meet the deadline, install a new one - it means that you simply made an overly optimistic forecast. It is more realistic to earn a million dollars in 10 years than in 1 month. It is useful to break a long-term goal into several short-term subgoals.

9. Make a plan

Now that you have completed all the previous steps, you have a clear idea of ​​what you want, what obstacles you have to overcome and who can help you. Now you need to make a detailed plan to achieve your goal. Write down a list of all your activities in order of priority and chronology.

10. "Back to the Future"

Many new wave psychologists and esotericists talk about the creative power of visualization. Now that you know what characteristics the desired thing should have (money, relationships, qualities, position, etc.), imagine that it is already in your life. Imagine in the most detailed detail the furnishings of your dream home, right down to the upholstery of the sofa and the rug in the bathroom, walk through the rooms. Imagine communicating with your loved one, how you prepare dinner together or talk until the morning.

Play your imaginary “movie” over and over again. In this way, you increase the power of your thinking and begin to attract the people, ideas and opportunities you need to achieve your goals. It’s as if you are attracting your dream.

11. Don't give up

Achieving big goals can take weeks, months, or years of hard work. Obstacles and difficulties will seem insurmountable. Don't even think about failure and don't give up. Every day, do something that brings you closer to your dream. Your strong desire, firm belief in the achievability of the goal, as well as perseverance and perseverance will definitely lead to success.

12. Learn to be happy with what you have

And finally, the magic secret. Your dream will come true if you can do just fine without the desired object. Let your dream go free, don’t make it the only meaning of life, and be grateful for what fate has already rewarded you with. Enjoy the process of turning your dreams into reality, because this is life.

Here are quotes from our books about how to achieve your dreams, completely change your life and become happier. Get inspired and inspire others!

Quotes from the book “Wanted and Could”

Illustration from the book

It is important to believe in yourself and trust your inner sensations. Don't let societal stereotypes limit your life. Everything is possible.

When there is a goal, you need to go towards it without turning aside. If you choose a winding road, you can waste all your energy along the way.

Old age is a state of mind. If you are afraid of old age and prepare for its arrival, you will definitely grow old. Health and happiness are personal choice everyone.

To be happy, you need to develop. You should never stop learning and learning new things.

It is believed that money is the key to all doors. As well this key can be trust and love.

Quotes from the book “Another Matter”

Illustration from the book

Look at your life from the outside and don’t be afraid to realize your wildest fantasies.

Idleness is a form of suicide.

It's never too late to change your occupation and start improving in a new business. No matter how late you start, you will still have enough time to achieve great skill.

Find something you enjoy doing anyway and learn how to get paid for it. This is your dream job.

You should only work with those with whom you feel good and comfortable. It's when you're twenty that you can endure it unpleasant person, justifying this by saying that he is your boss. After fifty you realize that life is short. Communicate only with those who respect you and whom you respect.

Quotes from the book “From Words to Actions”

Illustration from the book

You can dream endlessly, it can be very pleasant and gives strength. But if nothing is done, dreams will never lead to positive changes in life.

If you truly want to achieve your dream, it should be one of the highest priorities on your schedule.

To achieve success, you should remember that everything is actually quite simple: you just need to take a series of steps, one after another, and all together they will lead you to your goal.

If you are always busy with something, this does not mean you are getting closer to your dream. To achieve it, you need to work hard, but work smartly to go in the right direction.

Difficulties are not a reason to give up and give up, but a sign that you are moving forward.

Quotes from the book “The Whole Life”

If you continue to do what you have always done, you will receive what you have always received.

Success is not magic. It's all about concentration!

A brilliant idea without action is like Mark Maguire playing baseball without a bat.

“I must” puts pressure on you, “I want” puts you in a position of strength. Choose wisely!

The plains of hesitation are strewn with the bones of millions of those who, on the threshold of triumph, decided to wait a little - and died waiting.

Quotes from the book “This Year I...”

Judge your success by the things you had to give up to achieve it.

Deadlock - very a good place in order to turn around!

“Wrong time” is the best time to start change.

Difference between successful people and those who have difficulty doing everything, it is not the number of failures. It's about the willingness to take risks and what those people do when they fail.

The more you make your desires a part Everyday life, the faster they turn into a habit that you don’t need to think about constantly.

Quotes from the book “Essentialism”

Illustration from the book

There are so many opportunities and things to do in the world that we don’t have enough time or resources for everything. And although many of them seem interesting to us, only a few are truly necessary.

Learn to prioritize in your life. Or someone else will do it for you.

Saying “no” at the right time can change the course of history.

There are three deeply ingrained assumptions that we must overcome: “I should,” “all of this is important,” and “I can do both.” We need to replace this false logic with three truths: “I choose,” “only a few things matter,” and “I can do anything, but not everything.”

Whatever decision you have to make, just ask yourself: “What is essential?” Drop everything else.

Quotes from the book “What to Dream About”

To live a fulfilling and full life, you need to look not for what is “right” in general, but for what is right for you.

Once you follow your dreams, you will awaken and everything will become meaningful.

As impractical as it may seem, figuring out where your heart lies most is the most practical thing in the world.

"Now" - keyword. The obstacles you see in front of you are simply an opportunity to postpone the moment when you start making your dreams come true.

Taking a small step from speculation to reality can bring amazing relief.

This could be anyone, such as a favorite character from a book or a famous philosopher. Every time you start to doubt yourself, think about having your imaginary friend answer you, you can even write down the thoughts you like. Of course, you will have to use a lot of imagination, but this method will help you establish relationships with future colleagues.

Learn to understand your feelings

A person experiences envy, anxiety, disappointment and much more throughout his life. Few people admit to themselves that their business is not going well. To avoid such problems, write down on a piece of paper every day everything you feel. It is enough to write in one word. Spend some time re-reading your lists and finding what comes up most often. If, for example, it is anxiety, then identify the cause of your anxiety and get rid of this problem.

Loser T-shirt

Express your emotions with a little creativity. Create your own series of T-shirts with a little impudent phrases, like: “I don’t owe you anything, I don’t want anything, leave me alone, everyone.” There can be any options, the main thing is that you can throw out your emotions in them.

Don't constantly sort through trash

When you sort through trash, you give yourself the impression that you are doing important matter. However, in reality, you are simply wasting time. It is important to learn to identify truly important activities and devote enough time to them. Of course, you need to put things in order, but not all the time. It’s better to devote 10 minutes to this every day and promise yourself that every month you will throw away several unnecessary things, even if there are 10 of them. After a while, you will notice that your apartment has become much cleaner and more spacious.

Make big plans

Write 3 plans for yourself. The first one must be absolutely fantastic. for example, about how you sail on your yacht to your own island.

You will complete the second one in two years. For example, buy a house in Spain. Let the third plan be fulfilled in 3 months and be quite realistic. For example, you go on vacation and visit a recommended restaurant.

Such activities may seem useless to you, but they teach you to dream, plan and always remember what is really important to you and what you really want.