Once upon a time, an old Indian revealed to his grandson one vital truth:
— There is a struggle inside every person, very similar to the struggle of two wolves. One wolf represents evil: envy, jealousy, regret, selfishness, ambition, lies. Another wolf brings good: peace, love, hope, friendliness, truth, kindness, loyalty.
The little Indian, touched to the depths of his soul by his grandfather’s words, thought for a few moments, and then asked:
- Which wolf wins in the end?
A barely noticeable smile touched the old Indian’s face, and he replied:
“The wolf you feed always wins.”
In many ways, our attitude to life, work, etc. depends on our perception. The filter of perception that stands in our subconscious and consciousness, beliefs, principles, the emotional background in which we find ourselves - all this greatly distorts the actual picture. We see what we can see in this moment time. Our mood directly changes this perception. When we rejoice, there is beauty around us, and everything seems beautiful to us. When we are sad, the whole world is unfriendly and people are prejudiced towards us. This is projected by our internal state. We see our reflection around us.
Understanding this, we can draw conclusions. If you want beauty, love, health, success - you must broadcast it from yourself. Radiate light, joy, love. Only then will life around you blossom with riotous colors, everything will delight you, and even failures will become experience and a guide to further improvement.
Look around you now. What did you see? Table, window, closet, noisy street? Or a ray of sunshine, birdsong, bright colors, flowers? No wonder they say that beauty is in the eye of the beholder. Some see dirt and flies, others see flowers and clouds. Listen to what the people around you say? What happens inside a person is what he talks about. Some are about diseases. Others about art. Some are about tragedies. Others are about love and relationships. Everyone lives with their own filter, which shows them the world as they can see it. Listen to your thoughts.
Draw conclusions about what is more in you, negative or positive. Think about what you would like to change in your life: see negativity in yourself, your unconsciousness, absorption in thoughts that ruin your life; through internal perception, change the external in your world. Negative experiences have serious side effects:
- During and after their manifestation, dullness sets in (a sharp weakening of the ability and desire to distinguish what is perceived);
- They cause poor physical well-being;
- There is a loss of interest, anticipation, enthusiasm, etc. positive emotions, joyful wishes;
- Their occurrence is incompatible with clear thinking, as well as with insight;
- When you experience negative emotions, you are like a programmed robot: reactions and actions are easy to calculate in advance, and your actions are extremely ineffective.
It is almost impossible to escape from the flow of negative emotions without persistent and determined training. Even if in some situation you want to stop experiencing them, they will not stop: such is the power of a thousand-fold fixed habit.
First, you should develop a positive outlook, or a positive attitude. This is prerequisite to achieve the goal. It seems easy to perceive life from the point of view of an optimist, to see everything positively. However, when there are so many problems and troubles around, it is quite difficult to do this. You need to understand that the world does not have a positive or negative charge. A person himself paints a situation in one color or another depending on his perceptions, beliefs and expectations. Different people They see the same situation in their own way. One perceives it as positive, the other as sharply negative. It depends on faith, beliefs, upbringing and other factors. For example, when we are watching a comedy and a person falls on the screen, it is funny - a positive perception. But if you fall and you are in pain, there is a negative perception. You may have passed by fallen man on the street and did not pay attention to this incident - neutral perception. We ourselves, our subconscious and consciousness evaluate events. At the same time, there is often an outburst of emotions, and all this without our participation. However, you can try to control your feelings, although this is not easy and is not always possible, especially at first. But if you try, the results will certainly come. The most difficult thing is not only not to outwardly show negative emotions, but really believe that everything is going well (or at least neutral).
What to do if troubles arise, something doesn’t work out? Remember the rule: there are no failures, only experience! Any incident, any situation is an experience that needs to be learned and applied in one’s own life. further activities. Only those who do nothing make no mistakes. All famous people went through many ups and downs. Every rich person lost money, every scientist conducted hundreds, or even thousands, of unsuccessful experiments. To get somewhere one day, you need to take many steps. Our mistakes are not us, they are just a step through which we go towards our goal.
It is impossible to ruin a person's mood. Psychologists say that one person is not able to change emotional condition another. Our emotional background changes our attitude, our reaction to what is happening. We can react positively or negatively, depending on our upbringing, our consciousness, our attitude and beliefs. Our mood is in our hands. In any circumstances, you can quickly find the positive, or sit like a beech, offended by everyone and everything...
Seeing joy in your life, accepting it, enjoying your personal time and your work - this is what you can and should strive for! See many positive events and take your positive emotional state as a basis. See your life as a set of events and actions that bring satisfaction and joy. Get true pleasure from your life. Look for the positives in it.
Remember right now what good happened to you over the past week? How many positive events did you remember? How often do you experience joy?
At trainings personal growth Many people cannot at all remember events that brought them true joy and satisfaction. They take good events for granted. At the same time, they clearly identify the negative when something in their life does not work out. These people have forgotten how to rejoice! Do you know how to rejoice? Do you feel like it’s warming inside you when you’re in positive mood? You have inner feeling deep satisfaction? Do you enjoy your achievements and simply wonderful events in your life?
Joy can come from more than just a good salary, a major acquisition, or meeting a friend. You can rejoice at a green leaf, an ant on your finger, a childhood memory, successful negotiations, the smile of a passerby, children playing in the park and much more. Look around you. Look for a positive miracle near you right now! It could be a hot pancake emitting fragrant steam. Branch in the window. Photo of parents on the table. Observe, devote a few minutes to this. Feel how magic happens inside you, how you are filled with positive feelings.
If you have a negative attitude towards events in your life, it will not bring you satisfaction. You are not growing at all, either professionally or personally, or you are growing very slowly. All this negatively affects your personal life.
Therefore, look for joy not only in personal life, but also in every action. Find what you love about your job. Deepen the activities in your field that bring maximum satisfaction. Do your work from the heart and with deep feeling satisfaction. Charge your every action with a positive, good mood. Do it consciously: remember that conscious activity makes your life much more effective, and the positivity brought into it will multiply this. Look for pleasant emotions in everything!
If you don't see any positivity in your life, create it. Let this be a moment of joy from a completed task. There is a rule: give yourself a small gift every day, and the world will give you something else. I follow this rule and know that it really works.
Stop living in a routine! Get out of the circle of everyday automaticity. May success accompany you, rejoice in every circumstance.
Routine work, stress from communicating with big amount of people, hidden stress from winter, traffic jams and colds + the eternal confrontation between those whose “glass is half empty” and those for whom not only their glasses are always full, but also other aspects of life - all this can become a reason for turning you into a complete pessimist. If you look closely, there are plenty of reasons for pessimism and even depression: just look at our economy and the state of the labor market (but let’s not go into this topic, otherwise we risk moving from life hacks to politics and economics). However, there are several ways to tune yourself not only to “filtering” negativity, but also to a positive perception of reality (even such a difficult one as ours).
What is the real source of optimism?
Each person has his own set of rules and patterns for interpreting certain events that concern him. It is much easier for pessimists to find reasons to be sad, and for optimists to find reasons to be happy; and there is nothing strange about it.
It's all about the initial attitude, which we apply even to the most seemingly elementary things. It is clear that wars, illnesses or death not only upset, but also frighten people, make them experience not only physical, but also moral suffering. However, for some reason, most of the people around us prefer to make a tragedy out of the fact that they are stuck in a traffic jam on the way to work, or to rejoice only when, in the distant, uncertain future, they have saved up money for themselves. new car. As a result, a chronic feeling of being “unhappy” occupies a pessimistic person most time.
Optimists create “little rules” for themselves, thanks to which they perceive the same situations differently: “any day that you are on the earth, and not under it, is already a reason for good mood"(as in the saying).
Create for yourself “little rules of optimism”
To set yourself up for a positive perception of reality, there is no need to resort to sedatives, neurostimulants, or getting hung up on finding the positive in everything that happens to you. A few small rules of behavior and perception in relation to a particular situation in your life are enough (it’s like training, you need to accustom yourself to them at first, but then it will become easier):
1. Sit down and write a list of your rules.
Take a pen and a piece of paper (no computers or monitors) and write down your own “little rules” in the format of the following statements, divided into 2 types:
- “I feel unhappy when the following happens: ... (and list in a column)”
- “I feel happy when: ... (and again the list in a column)”
There is no need to make very large lists. The accuracy and completeness of the list is less important here than the sensations and emotions themselves that are conveyed through these “little rules”: what is important is what first comes to your mind when forming the concept “ negative emotion" and "positive emotion".
2. Pay attention to the results obtained
Have you made lists? Now sit down and re-read the results as if it were written not by you, but by a stranger. What feeling does it feel? Was this written by a pessimist or an optimist? Is it easy for such a person to be happy or is it easier to feel unhappy?
The proof that this kind of self-analysis works is the fact that you got to this stage. If you didn’t feel somewhere deep down in your soul that something didn’t suit you in your attitude towards life, you wouldn’t have gotten so far in doing this exercise.
Most often, it turns out that part (or even a significant part) of your expectations from life are significantly underestimated, because you are already subconsciously prepared for the fact that nothing will work out, and in order not to be upset once again, you simply don't take any steps towards what upsets you.
3. Rework your rules to improve them
Now it's time to get a little creative. Take a second piece of paper, take a deep breath and ask yourself again:
- What everyday events can make you feel happy?
- What unusual events might make you feel unhappy?
Formulate answers to these questions - important task. Consider all the possibilities and give answers to what you would like to see in your life. The first question is to list as many things, events and phenomena as possible. And make the second list shorter: include only the most serious and truly sad events.
When you finish making your lists, rewrite your “rules of optimism” in the following format:
- “I’m happy when... [event]”
- “I am only unhappy if... [event]”
Formulations come into play here important role. As a result, you will end up with 2 sheets of paper: on one there are “pessimist rules” by which you live now, on the other there are “optimist rules” by which you would like to live and in which you want to believe in the future.
4. Now burn the old rules
It sounds a little strange and childish, but the simple “ritual of burning” rules that are no longer needed works, and here’s why.
Over the past more than 125 thousand years of human history, one of the distinctive skills of man has been the ability to control fire. Fire has become part of rituals, religions and ceremonies - from native idols to Catholic churches. The importance of fire in human life is laid down on a subconscious level in generations of people, and burning is a way to transform something materialized (like words on paper) into something intangible (to make everything “go away and not return”). Burn your past attitude towards life - a small ritual that will serve as a kind of emotional release.
5. Place new rules so that they catch your eye every day
New rules must take the place of old rules. Place the new rules sheet next to your desk, near your computer monitor, or near your bathroom mirror. Make sure that each of your days begins with an involuntary reading of these rules, so that you yourself pronounce/read the rule written by hand every day, tuning your brain to perceive in reality primarily its positive, rather than negative, sides.
The key to optimism, a healthier lifestyle, new opportunities in life and work is in your hands, just try it!
“A successful person is not the one who has the best, but the one who knows how to extract the best from everything that life gives.” (Author unknown).
“One ray of light is enough to dispel the darkness.” (Schopenhauer).
“Whoever firmly knows what to do tames fate.” (Miklukho Maclay).
“If a person is happy with everything, he does not get sick.” (Rogers)
“A happy person goes to work with joy in the morning, and returns home with joy in the evening.” (Author unknown).
To be in harmony with yourself and with outside world A positive outlook on life is necessary. This means viewing all events that happen in life as favorable, that is, adhering to D. Carnegie’s advice “make lemonade out of lemons,” having positive thinking and the habit of being an optimist (talking more about good things). There are two types of people: some carry a “box of bitter memories” in their souls, and others carry a “box of precious moments” - they are tuned in to love, kindness, and forgiveness. This is facilitated by active work and a way of life, humor that brings peace of mind in difficult situations, good sleep and communication with friends. Support good mood It helps to change the environment (rearranging furniture, updating your wardrobe), traveling or diversifying walking routes, avoiding monotony, reading and watching funny stories, films.
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“A successful person is not the one who has the best, but the one who knows how to extract the best from everything that life gives.” (Author unknown).
“One ray of light is enough to dispel the darkness.” (Schopenhauer).
“Whoever firmly knows what to do tames fate.” (Miklukho Maclay).
“If a person is happy with everything, he does not get sick.” (Rogers)
“A happy person goes to work with joy in the morning, and returns home with joy in the evening.” (Author unknown).
To be in harmony with yourself and with the outside world you need a positive perception of life. This means viewing all events that happen in life as favorable, that is, adhering to D. Carnegie’s advice “make lemonade out of lemons,” having positive thinking and the habit of being an optimist (talking more about good things). There are two types of people: some carry a “box of bitter memories” in their souls, and others carry a “box of precious moments” - they are tuned in to love, kindness, and forgiveness. This is facilitated by active activity and lifestyle, humor, which brings peace of mind in difficult situations, good sleep and communication with friends. A change of environment (rearranging furniture, updating your wardrobe), traveling or a variety of walking routes, avoiding monotony, reading and watching funny stories and films helps to maintain a good mood.
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