Hi all!
Girls, I have added all future participants of the “Changing Lives for the Better” marathon to my best friends! For those who haven't seen the posts yet, you still have time to join!
So, October will come next week and you and I will have to start achieving our goals! To begin with, of course, they need to be correctly staged and formulated (but more on that later). And now, while you are thinking about them, let’s think about the reasons why people set goals for themselves and then don’t achieve them, abandon them, forget them, why the motivation and drive for fulfillment are not enough for long.
The reasons may be the following:
1. Too ambitious goals have been set (too difficult and impossible for a person to achieve, and the first difficulties in their implementation fall like a heavy burden on the person, and he simply gives up and burns out). I am for adequacy! For example, if you have never organized anything in your life, and even organizing a picnic trip with your family for you, it’s difficult to plan - but you shouldn’t try to open your own business right away. Or if you weigh 100 kg, you cannot lose 50 kg in 3 months. You need to start small and set feasible goals, but not too easy ones! Goals should inspire, motivate and bring change into your life!
2. “Non-native goals.” My girls, you need to set goals “Family”, which come from your heart and are dictated by a great desire to achieve this, conditioned real love to what you want.
It's like work. If you work at a job just to earn money, then such work will not please you for long. IN in this case motivation comes from the head, not from the heart.
(by the way, let’s not start a discussion right now about how to live if you need money. This is all understandable, but no one bothers you to simultaneously look for what you really like, study, etc. I started from scratch in a new city, knowing absolutely no one - no friends, no connections (for new friends: I moved with Far East to St. Petersburg, and my specialty is generally an accountant)
The main way to stay motivated for a long time (besides discipline and perseverance) is to follow the path with your heart, and bring love into all areas of your life, into all the activities and goals that you want to pursue.
Therefore, let your goals come from your heart, think about what you really want. Do not be afraid. Is it true. I promise that there will be ways to achieve them. I will be ready to help some who really need to help describe how to achieve them, where to start. think with you.
And finally, a piece from Joe Vitale’s book “The Secret of Attraction. How to get what you really want" (I copy the text, I don’t know what kind of font it will be)
Twenty years ago, Scrally Blotnik conducted a study in which fifteen hundred people took part. The experiment participants were divided into two groups. GroupAI believed that you should first earn money, and then do what you love. This group numbered 1245 people. GroupBconsisted of 255 participants who were going to do what they were interested in and believed that the money would come to them later.
What happened to them during this time?
One hundred and one participants in the experiment became millionaires. Moreover, only one of them was a representative of group A. The remaining hundred were then part of the groupBand intended to do what they loved in the hope of quickly getting rich. Here's another secret to attracting money.What are you thinking about - about money, or about what you like?
So we think while there is time, I want you to set yourself real goals that come from the heart!
I propose to analyze reasons why some goals remain unattainable. Or why some people get everything from life, while others are left with unfulfilled dreams in their pockets:
- No goals have been set. There are dreams, fantasies that “if only I had...”, but there is no goal recorded on paper according to all the rules.
- Goals are set incorrectly, or these are not “your” goals, and the goals of husband/wife, children, parents, boss, friends. It is very important to determine in time which goals are yours and which are imposed from the outside.
- Goals are too big or too small. The goal should motivate! So that you want to get up at 5 am and do as many actions as possible during the day that bring you closer to the result and, most importantly, get no less from this process, and maybe even more pleasure. At any age, you can and should set big and important goals. When a person has a goal in his life, the aging of the body slows down, diseases disappear as unnecessary or become non-critical (the causes of diseases are described in sufficient detail in my article). It doesn’t matter how old you are: at 50, at 60, and even at 70, you can make a huge number of breakthroughs in your life. The practice of coaching showed me this very clearly - the main thing is to have meaning and goals in life! Human unique creature, its possibilities are endless!
- If you are under 30 years old, life is just beginning and this is the time for your personality to grow and develop most fruitfully.
- 30-40 years is the peak active form, both physical and mental, when different ideas they come almost constantly. It is only important to accustom yourself to write them down in the first 2-3 minutes after they appear. Otherwise, they will be forgotten later, and who knows, maybe one of them will bring you that happiness of self-realization, in which life will be harmonious in all areas. This is the age when you can maximum benefit engage in self-development, personal and professional growth, spiritual development, physical improvement.
- If you are 40-50 years old, you have accumulated a huge life experience, a colossal amount of knowledge and skills that will help you make a powerful start in a new direction.
- Lack of energy resources. To move towards your goal, you need to bring the body to a peak state, and when all channels of energy flow are open, co-tuning with the vibrations of the Universe will occur and it will help you achieve your goal in every way. Having knowledge, you can set yourself super-correct, truly your goals, consistent with each other. But you may simply lack the energy to start implementing them. Then the goal can gradually become a pipe dream. There are several reasons for this, but they stem from one thing - you don’t monitor your physical body, do not fill it with energy:
- you don't have enough rest;
- eat poorly
- don't study physical activity, sports,
- you drink little water,
- do not cleanse your body of toxins.
- Inability to focus on the main thing and highlight important things. If you have a goal and energy to realize it, but you don’t know how to identify actions that will bring highest result(Pareto rule) - there will be no result. And the main trick is to determine which 20% of actions will bring 80% of the results. Here greatest benefit can be brought by coaches, consultants, trainers, mentors. If you've never started new business, it is difficult to know for sure which actions will be the most correct and effective. If you have never played sports and have accumulated a bunch of illnesses, it is difficult to understand for yourself what steps to start on the path to physical health and perfection.
- We stop too quickly and give up at the first failures. The grander the goal, the greater the obstacles that may arise along the way. Don’t let anyone stop you, demoralize you, convince you that you can’t do it, it’s none of your business... Don’t let yourself be deceived by those who say that some techniques, methods or conditions will allow you to eliminate these obstacles. Affirmations, visualizations, meditations - everything works with to varying degrees efficiency. But. How more goal, the greater the barriers that arise - both external and internal. And, if external barriers can be overcome with the help of other people - coaches, consultants, friends who have gone through similar things - no one can remove internal barriers for you except yourself. This work is not easy, many give up only under the pressure of internal blocks and beliefs that they cannot change (more about the forms of false determinism in the next article).
Good luck to you on your path to your true goals! And I am ready to help you with this with the help of the “Balanced System of Personality Development”, which includes specific step-by-step methods, step by step instructions in working with goals.
Below are five reasons that explain why the majority of the inhabitants of planet Earth still do not achieve wealth.
The average person grows up in a family where he never meets rich people
At stages of life such as kindergarten, school, university, work, he interacts with people who are clearly not rich. His circle of acquaintances and friends also does not include rich people. There are simply no rich role models in his life. If this happens to a person with early age and continues at further stages of his formation as a person, it simply does not occur to him that being rich is as possible and realistic for him as for others. That is why people who grew up in wealthy families have much more chances achieve prosperity than others. And the average person simply does not realize that this is possible for him. And of course, if this idea does not occur to a person, then he does nothing to implement it.
The second reason people don't achieve well-being is that they never decide to do so.
Even if a person reads books, attends seminars, or interacts with very wealthy people in financially, nothing will change until he decides to act differently (not as usual). Even if he realizes that he can become rich by starting to act in a certain way, without making a decision to act, nothing will change. If you continue to do what you have always done, you will continue to get what you have always gotten. main reason failure and the fact that people do not reveal their true capabilities is that most people simply do not dare to be successful. They never make a commitment to themselves or make a clear decision that they are going to be wealthy. They think, intend, hope and plan...to do it...one day. They all wait and hope that they will earn an immense amount of money, but they never dare to say to themselves “I will do it!” This solution is very important step on the way to .
The third reason is procrastination.
People always find excuses not to take the actions necessary to achieve financial freedom. There will always be a wrong day, month or even year for them. Situations in their field of activity will always be unstable, or even too suspiciously good. Perhaps they will dare to take serious action. Perhaps in the next life. For such people there will always be reasons for delay. As a result, they will continue to put off day after day, month after month, year after year, until it is too late. Even if a person realized that he could become rich and decided to change the usual course of things, then delay will push all his plans into an unclear future.
A huge number of people continue to remain poor due to the fact that they do not know how to manage money correctly
Such people spend every penny they earn, or even the money they take. If you cannot discipline yourself to refrain from spending everything you earn, then you simply cannot acquire wealth. And if you don't make planning a lifelong habit, it will simply be impossible for you to achieve financial freedom.
The fifth reason people stay poor is lack of time perspective
It is defined as the amount of time you take into account when planning your daily activities and when making decisions. important decisions In my life. It also has to do with how far you looked into the future when you made the decision to act one way or another in the present. An example of a long-term perspective is a habit English families place the child in Oxford or Cambridge as soon as he is born. A young couple who starts saving $50 a month for a scholarship fund so their child can attend college is a couple with a long-term time horizon. They are willing to sacrifice in the short term to achieve best results in the long term. People with long term almost invariably move up in economically throughout life.
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Another factor of financial success is mental capacity, the ability to accept complex and right decisions V critical situations. Find out to become one of the minority of people who are truly rich.
Many people fail to achieve success simply because they promise themselves too much or because they don’t know how to formulate clear goals. If you don’t want to be in their company, read and learn from other people’s mistakes.
It's that time of year again when the promises you make to yourself turn out to be empty words. These ambitions are as strongly associated with failure as they are with the New Year. “Very many people think new year holidays a magical time when you can promise yourself something and then stick to it for the rest of your life. But reality takes its toll, they get disappointed and forget everything,” says Will Meek, a psychologist from Vancouver and Portland. But this does not necessarily have to be the case. There are certain human qualities that contribute to setting you up for failure.
Octopus
Five - good figure and eight too, but people who make so many promises to themselves at once make life difficult for themselves. “If you have five goals, some will definitely be unattainable,” says Mick. “Few people have the strength to achieve much at once.” He says two is a good number, three is the maximum.
Show off
It can be encouraging, but if you want to be serious, be realistic. Don't make it a point to go to the gym at 5pm every day if you haven't been there for a year. Better get off the bus a couple of stops early and take a walk.
Lover of common words
You shouldn’t promise yourself “there is healthy food” or “rest more.” It's not too specific. “If the goal you set isn't very clear, it's hard to tell whether you're getting closer to it or not,” says Mick. You can start with the general, but then you need to work out everything in more detail.
Dreamer
Just because you like the way your friend lives, doesn't mean you should copy his life. “A lot of people think they should do something, make a promise to themselves, and then it turns out it doesn't mean anything to them,” says Mick. If you don't have your heart set on something, no matter how beneficial it may be (like quitting smoking), you're unlikely to succeed. To overcome this quality, you need to be as honest with yourself as possible.
A procrastinator
Quickly concocted lists of promises will most likely remain on paper. Therefore, those who procrastinate rarely keep their promises to themselves. “People need to get used to the idea first, cook it in their heads,” says Mick.
Disorganized
According to Mick, scientists have not yet decided which is better: making promises only for the short term, making long-term plans, or a combination. But tracking your progress can help a lot. The reasons are approximately the same as in the previous case.
Lonely
Support works wonders when it comes to achieving your goals. Just one example " Alcoholics Anonymous"What's it worth? But not all support helps. “If you're just going to complain about how hard it is for you, then it's better to do it alone,” says Mick. When seeking support for promises you make to yourself, proceed with caution.
The one who doesn't know how to lose
You won't keep some of the promises you made to yourself. It's almost inevitable. But it's not a problem unless you make one out of it. “If we go through failure with our heads up, it can be considered a victory,” says Mick. He talks about how he was on a great diet during the summer, but couldn't keep it down for the wedding dinner. This knocked him out for four months, but then he returned to the diet again. Keeping a promise to yourself can lead to many difficulties. But overcoming them should only strengthen you.
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According to research, 92% of people have set goals. At the same time, we have all heard about successful individuals, and we’re not talking about “my mother’s friend’s son.” In fact, the secret of such people is the ability to clearly formulate what they want. A correctly stated goal is the first step towards achieving it. In fact, there is nothing complicated about this, but there are special techniques, which everyone who has any plans in this life should know about.
website offers ways to help you become one of the lucky 8% who succeed in everything in life.
SMART goals
The SMART goal setting technique helps to correctly formulate a goal, put it into words and make it specific, understandable and achievable.
This technique has 5 criteria:
Specificity. The goal must be clear, otherwise how will you understand what needs to be done? Instead of “play sports” you need to indicate “start running in the morning” or “buy a subscription to Gym».
Measurable. To understand where the measure of success is, instead of “lose weight,” formulate your goal like this: “lose 5 kg.”
Achievable. Dreaming, of course, is not bad, but we set goals in order to achieve them, right? Therefore, instead of “earn 5 times more money“We write “get a promotion at work and double your income.”
Relevance. The goal must match your plans and expectations. For example, you want to make new acquaintances with the opposite sex based on common hobbies. How would you like to achieve this? There are many options. You can take cooking classes, you can choose a dance school or a gym. If you set your priorities incorrectly, there is a big risk of not achieving your goal.
Time-bound. The goal must have a clearly defined time frame. If you don’t set yourself the goal of learning English to level B1 in a year, then you can study it almost endlessly and never achieve results.
Brian Tracy system
The Canadian-American motivational coach teaches his clients to achieve their goals in 12 steps. Here's what he suggests doing:
- Create a burning desire to achieve your goal. It will become your motivation to move towards success.
- Convince yourself that the goal is achievable. Without this, at some point you will simply give up.
- Write down the goal. Otherwise, it will remain just a dream.
- Write down the benefits. It is important to have a list of all the good things that will happen to you after achieving your goal, and to re-read it from time to time.
- Determine your starting point. You must imagine where and where you need to move.
- Set a deadline. Define exact time by which your goal should be achieved.
- Make a list of things that might get in the way. It is important to imagine what limitations you may encounter on the path to success.
- Determine if you need additional information. And if the answer is yes, figure out where you can find it.
- Determine who can help. If you have someone to rely on, that's great.
- Make an action plan. It should be as detailed as possible.
- Visualize the result. This is another tool that helps support high motivation.
- Decide that you will not give up until the goal is achieved.
Perhaps the last point is the most important in any business.
Goal setting
Psychologists use this technique to help their clients accept difficult decision, and it’s also great for formulating your goals. This is a simple algorithm and you only need to answer 5 questions:
- What do I want to achieve?
- How exactly will I do this?
- When can I do this?
- What can help me?
- What happens when I reach my goal?
For clarity, let's look at what this might look like.
Example
Let's say we decide to learn French. Let us formulate our goal as follows:
1. I want to learn French from scratch to A2 level on my own.
Now let's determine what specific steps need to be taken for this.
2. To learn French, I:
- I will learn the alphabet and reading rules;
- I will find tutorials and choose the best one from them;
- I will do one lesson from the book with exercises every day;
- I’ll start watching films and TV series in French, I’ll start listening to local radio stations;
- I will find people with whom I can practice the language.
Let's designate the time frame.
3. Study French will take 1 year:
- alphabet and reading rules - 2 days;
- search for tutorials - 1 day;
- doing homework and watching films - every day throughout the year;
- Finding a native speaker for communication - after 3 months of self-study.
Let's decide what can help achieve the goal. External resources are outside help, internal resources are our own. Every person has them.
4. To learn the language I have external and internal resources. My friend knows French, I can talk and correspond with her on social networks in French. My inner resources are determination and a penchant for learning languages.
The final question is the most important, because the answer to it provides motivation to move towards the desired result.
5. When will I learn French?, I can go to this country to study and find a job there.
And here you also need to pay attention that the answer to the 5th question should concern you personally, and not someone else. For example, “my mother will be proud of me” - this is unlikely good motivation, if it is the only one and you personally do not see any prospects for yourself after achieving the goal.