This section of our website contains stories from our favorite Russian writers for children aged 7-10 years. Many of them are included in the main school curriculum and the extracurricular reading program for 2nd and 3rd grade. However, these stories are not worth reading for the sake of a line in the reader's diary. Being classics of Russian literature, the stories of Tolstoy, Bianchi and other authors have educational and educational functions. In these short works, the reader encounters good and evil, friendship and betrayal, honesty and deception. Younger schoolchildren learn about the life and way of life of previous generations.
The stories of the classics not only teach and edify, but also entertain. The funny stories of Zoshchenko, Dragunsky, Oster are familiar to every person since childhood. Plots understandable to children and light humor made the stories the most read works among primary schoolchildren.
Read interesting stories by Russian writers online on our website!
The section is under development and will soon be filled with interesting works with illustrations.
Interesting and funny stories about children. Stories for children by Viktor Golyavkin. Stories for primary schoolchildren and middle school age.
We made original costumes - no one will have them! I will be a horse, and Vovka will be a knight. The only bad thing is that he has to ride me, and not me on him. And all because I'm a little younger. True, we agreed with him: he will not ride me all the time. He’ll ride me a little, and then he’ll get off and lead me like horses are led by the bridle. And so we went to the carnival. We came to the club in ordinary suits, and then changed clothes and went into the hall. That is, we moved in. I crawled on all fours. And Vovka was sitting on my back. True, Vovka helped me - he walked on the floor with his feet. But it was still not easy for me.
And I haven't seen anything yet. I was wearing a horse mask. I couldn’t see anything at all, although the mask had holes for the eyes. But they were somewhere on the forehead. I was crawling in the dark.
I bumped into someone's feet. I ran into a column twice. Sometimes I shook my head, then the mask slipped off and I saw the light. But for a moment. And then it's dark again. I couldn't shake my head all the time!
At least for a moment I saw the light. But Vovka saw nothing at all. And he kept asking me what was ahead. And he asked me to crawl more carefully. I crawled carefully anyway. I didn’t see anything myself. How could I know what was ahead! Someone stepped on my hand. I stopped immediately. And he refused to crawl any further. I told Vovka:
- Enough. Get off.
Vovka probably enjoyed the ride and didn’t want to get off. He said it was too early. But still he got down, took me by the bridle, and I crawled on. Now it was easier for me to crawl, although I still couldn’t see anything.
I suggested taking off the masks and looking at the carnival, and then putting the masks back on. But Vovka said:
“Then they will recognize us.”
“It must be fun here,” I said. “But we don’t see anything...”
But Vovka walked in silence. He firmly decided to endure until the end. Get first prize.
My knees started to hurt. I said:
- I'll sit on the floor now.
-Can horses sit? - said Vovka. “You’re crazy!” You're a horse!
“I’m not a horse,” I said. “You’re a horse yourself.”
“No, you’re a horse,” Vovka answered. “Otherwise we won’t get a bonus.”
“Well, let it be,” I said. “I’m tired of it.”
“Be patient,” said Vovka.
I crawled to the wall, leaned against it and sat on the floor.
- You are sitting? - asked Vovka.
“I’m sitting,” I said.
“Okay,” Vovka agreed. “You can still sit on the floor.” Just don't sit on the chair. Do you understand? A horse - and suddenly on a chair!..
Music was blaring all around and people were laughing.
I asked:
- Will it end soon?
“Be patient,” said Vovka, “probably soon...
Vovka couldn’t stand it either. I sat down on the sofa. I sat down next to him. Then Vovka fell asleep on the sofa. And I fell asleep too.
Then they woke us up and gave us a bonus.
YANDREEV. Author: Victor Golyavkin
Everything happens because of the last name. I'm alphabetically first in the magazine; Almost immediately they call me. That's why I study worse than everyone else. Vovka Yakulov got all A's. With his last name it’s not difficult - he’s at the very end of the list. Wait for him to be called. And with my last name you will be lost. I began to think about what to do. I think at lunch, I think before going to bed, I just can’t think of anything. I even climbed into the closet to think so as not to be disturbed. It was in the closet that I came up with this. I come to class and tell the kids:
- I’m not Andreev now. I am now Yaandreev.
- We have known for a long time that you are Andreev.
“No,” I say, “not Andreev, but Yaandreev, it starts with “I” - Yaandreev.”
- Can not understand anything. What kind of Yaandreev are you when you are just Andreev? There are no such names at all.
“For some,” I say, “it doesn’t happen, but for others it does.” Let me know this.
“It’s amazing,” says Vovka, “why you suddenly became Yaandreev!”
“You’ll see again,” I say.
I approach Alexandra Petrovna:
- You know, my thing is this: I have now become Yaandreev. Is it possible to change the magazine so that I begins with “I”?
- What kind of tricks? - says Alexandra Petrovna.
- These are not tricks at all. It's just very important to me. Then I will immediately be an excellent student.
- Call Natasha to the phone!
- Natasha is not here, what should I tell her?
- Give her five rubles!
The patient came to the doctor:
- Doctor, you advised me to count to 100,000 to fall asleep!
- Well, did you fall asleep?
- No, it’s already morning! Sent by Yana Sukhoverkhova from Estonia, Pärnu May 18, 2003
- Vasya! Doesn't it bother you that you're left-handed?
- No. Every person has their own shortcomings. For example, with what hand do you stir the tea?
- Right!
- Here you see! But normal people stir with a spoon!
A crazy person is walking down the street and dragging a thread behind him.
A passerby asks him:
- Why are you dragging a thread behind you?
What should I push forward?
- My neighbor was a vampire.
- How did you know this?
“And I drove an aspen stake into his chest, and he died.”
- Boy, why are you crying so bitterly?
- Because of rheumatism.
- What? So small and you already have rheumatism?
- No, I got a bad mark because I wrote “rhythmism” in the dictation!
- Sidorov! My patience has run out! Don't come to school tomorrow without your father!
- And the day after tomorrow?
- Petya, why are you laughing? Personally, I don’t see anything funny!
- And you can’t even see: you sat on my jam sandwich!
— Petya, how many excellent students are there in your class?
- Not counting me, four.
- Are you an excellent student?
- No. That's what I said - not counting me!
Phone call in the staff room:
- Hello! Is this Anna Alekseevna? Tolik's mother says.
- Who? I can't hear well!
- Tolika! I spell it out: Tatyana, Oleg, Leonid, Ivan, Kirill, Andrey!
- What? And all the children are in my class?
During a drawing lesson, one student turns to his neighbor at his desk:
- You drew great! I've got an appetite!
- Appetite? From sunrise?
- Wow! And I thought you drew scrambled eggs!
During a singing lesson, the teacher said:
— Today we’ll talk about opera. Who knows what opera is?
Vovochka raised his hand:
- I know. This is when one person kills another in a duel, and the other sings for a long time before falling!
The teacher handed out notebooks after checking the dictation.
Vovochka approaches the teacher with her notebook and asks:
- Maria Ivanovna, I didn’t understand what you wrote below!
— I wrote: “Sidorov, write legibly!”
The teacher talked in class about great inventors. Then she asked the students:
-What would you like to invent?
One student said:
— I would invent such a machine: you press a button and all the lessons are ready!
- What a lazy person! - the teacher laughed.
Then Vovochka raised his hand and said:
“And I would come up with a device that would press this button!”
Vovochka answers in zoology class:
- The length of the crocodile from head to tail is 5 meters, and from tail to head - 7 meters...
“Think about what you’re saying,” the teacher interrupts Vovochka. - Is it possible?
“It happens,” Vovochka answers. - For example, from Monday to Wednesday - two days, and from Wednesday to Monday - five!
— Vovochka, what do you want to become when you grow up?
- An ornithologist.
- Is this the one who studies birds?
- Yeah. I want to cross a pigeon with a parrot.
- For what?
- What if suddenly the pigeon gets lost, so that it can ask the way home!
The teacher asks Vovochka:
—What are the last teeth a person develops?
“Artificial,” answered Vovochka.
Vovochka stops the car on the street:
- Uncle, take me to school!
- I'm going in the opposite direction.
- All the better!
“Dad,” says Vovochka, “I must tell you that tomorrow there will be a small meeting of students, parents and teachers at school.”
— What does “small” mean?
- It's just you, me and the homeroom teacher.
We wrote a dictation. When Alla Grigorievna was checking the notebooks, she turned to Antonov:
- Kolya, why are you so inattentive? I dictated: “The door creaked and opened.” What did you write? "The door creaked and fell off!"
And everyone laughed!
“Vorobiev,” said the teacher, “you didn’t do your homework again!” Why?
— Igor Ivanovich, we had no light yesterday.
- And what were you doing? Perhaps you watched TV?
- Yeah, in the dark...
And everyone laughed!
A young teacher complains to her friend:
“One of my students completely tormented me: he makes noise, misbehaves, disrupts lessons!
- But does he have at least one positive quality?
- Unfortunately, there is - he doesn’t miss classes...
In our German lesson we covered the topic “My Hobby”. The teacher called Petya Grigoriev. He stood and was silent for a long time.
“I don’t hear the answer,” said Elena Alekseevna. — What is your hobby?
Then Petya said in German:
- Their bin briefmarke! (I am a postage stamp!)
And everyone laughed!
The lesson has begun. The teacher asked:
— Duty officer, who is absent from class?
Pimenov looked around and said:
— Mushkin is absent.
At this time, Mushkin’s head appeared in the doorway:
- I'm not absent, I'm here!
And everyone laughed!
It was a geometry lesson.
- Who solved the problem? - asked Igor Petrovich.
Vasya Rybin was the first to raise his hand.
“Great, Rybin,” the teacher praised, “Please, come to the board!”
Vasya came to the board and said importantly:
— Consider triangle ABCD!
And everyone laughed!
Why weren't you at school yesterday?
— My older brother got sick.
- What does that have to do with you?
- And I rode his bike!
— Petrov, why are you learning English so poorly?
- What for?
- What do you mean why? After all, half the globe speaks this language!
- And isn’t this enough?
- Petya, if you met old man Hottabych, what wish would you ask him to fulfill?
— I would ask to make London the capital of France.
- Why?
- And yesterday I answered geography and got a bad mark!..
- Well done, Mitya. - says dad. — How did you manage to get an A in zoology?
- They asked me how many legs an ostrich has and I answered - three.
- Wait, but an ostrich has two legs!
- Yes, but all the others answered that there were four!
Petya was invited to visit. They tell him:
- Petya, take another piece of cake.
- Thank you, I have already eaten two pieces.
- Then eat a tangerine.
- Thank you, I have already eaten three tangerines.
“Then take some fruit with you.”
- Thank you, I already took it!
Cheburashka found a penny on the road. He comes to a store where they sell toys. He gives a penny to the saleswoman and says:
- Give me this toy, this one and this one!..
The saleswoman looks at him in surprise.
- Well, what are you waiting for? - says Cheburashka. - Give me the change and I'll go!
Vovochka and her dad are standing near a cage where a lion sits at the zoo.
“Dad,” says Vovochka, “and if a lion accidentally jumps out of the cage and eats you, which bus should I take home?”
“Dad,” asks Vovochka, “why don’t you have a car?”
— There is no money for a car. Don’t be lazy, study better, become a good specialist and buy yourself a car.
- Dad, why were you lazy at school?
“Petya,” asks dad, “why are you limping?”
“I put my foot in the mousetrap and it pinched me.”
- Don't stick your nose where it shouldn't!
- Grandfather, what are you doing with this bottle? Do you want to install a boat in it?
“That’s exactly what I wanted at first.” Now I would be glad to just take my hand out of the bottle!
“Dad,” the daughter turns to her father, “our phone works badly!”
- Why did you decide that?
— Now I was talking to my friend and didn’t understand anything.
—Have you tried talking in turns?
“Mom,” Vovochka asked, “how much toothpaste is in the tube?”
- Don't know.
- And I know: from the sofa to the door!
- Dad, get on the phone! - Petya shouted to his father, who was shaving in front of the mirror.
When dad finished the conversation, Petya asked him:
- Dad, are you good at remembering faces?
- I think I remember. And what?
- The fact is that I accidentally broke your mirror...
— Dad, what is “telefiguration”?
- Don't know. Where did you read this?
- I didn’t read it, I wrote it!
- Natasha, why are you writing a letter to your grandmother so slowly?
- It’s okay: grandma reads slowly too!
- Anya, what have you done! You broke a vase that was two hundred years old!
- What happiness, mom! I thought it was completely new!
- Mom, what is etiquette?
- This is the ability to yawn with your mouth closed...
The art teacher says to Vovochka’s father:
— Your son has exceptional abilities. Yesterday he drew a fly on his desk, and I even knocked my hand away trying to get it away!
- What else is that! Recently he painted a crocodile in the bathroom, and I got so scared that I tried to jump out through the door, which was also painted on the wall.
Little Johnny says to his father:
- Dad, I decided to give you a gift for your birthday!
“The best gift for me,” said dad, “is if you study with straight A’s.”
- It's too late, dad, I already bought you a tie!
A little boy watches his dad at work as he paints the ceiling.
Mom says:
- Watch, Petya, and learn. And when you grow up, you will help your dad.
Petya is surprised:
- What, he won’t finish by then?
The hostess, hiring a new maid, asked her:
- Tell me, my dear, do you like parrots?
- Oh, don't worry, madam, I eat everything!
An auction is taking place in a pet store - talking parrots are on sale. One of the buyers who purchased a parrot asks the seller:
- Does he really speak well?
- Still would! After all, he was the one who kept increasing the price!
- Petya, what will you do if hooligans attack you?
- I’m not afraid of them - I know judo, karate, aikedo and other scary words!
- Hello! Animal defence community? There is a postman sitting on a tree in my yard and calling my poor dog all sorts of bad names!
Three bears return to their hut.
- Who touched my plate and ate my porridge?! - Papa Bear growled.
- Who touched my saucer and ate my porridge?! - the bear cub squeaked.
“Calm down,” said mother bear. - There was no porridge: I didn’t cook it today!
One man caught a cold and decided to treat himself with self-hypnosis. He stood in front of the mirror and began to inspire himself:
- I won’t sneeze, I won’t sneeze, I won’t sneeze... A-a-pchhi!!! This is not me, this is not me, this is not me...
- Mom, why does dad have so little hair on his head?
- The fact is that our dad thinks a lot.
“Then why do you have such voluminous hair?”
— Dad, today the teacher told us about an insect that lives only one day. That's great!
— Why “great”?
- Imagine, you can celebrate your birthday all your life!
One fisherman, a teacher by profession, caught a small catfish, admired it, and, throwing it back into the river, said:
- Go home and come back with your parents tomorrow!
A husband and wife came by car to visit. Leaving the car at the house, they tied the dog nearby and told it to guard the car. When they got ready to return home in the evening, they saw that all the wheels of the car had been removed. And there was a note attached to the car: “Don’t scold the dog, she was barking!”
One Englishman walked into a bar with a dog and told the visitors:
— I bet my talking dog will now read Hamlet’s monologue “To be or not to be!”
Alas, he immediately lost the bet. Because the dog didn't say a single word.
Coming out of the bar, the owner began shouting at the dog:
-Are you completely stupid?! I lost a thousand pounds because of you!
“You’re stupid,” the dog objected. - Don’t you understand that tomorrow in the same bar we can win ten times more!
- Your dog is strange - she sleeps all day long. How can she guard the house?
“It’s very simple: when someone stranger approaches the house, we wake her up and she starts barking.
The wolf is going to eat the hare. Hare says:
- Let's agree. I'll tell you three riddles. If you don't guess them, you'll let me go.
- Agree.
— A pair of black ones, shiny, with laces.
The wolf is silent.
- This is a pair of boots. Now the second riddle: four black, shiny ones, with laces.
The wolf is silent.
— Two pairs of shoes. The third riddle is the most difficult: it lives in a swamp, it is green, it croaks, it starts with “la” and ends with “gushka”.
The wolf shouts joyfully:
— Three pairs of shoes!!!
Bats hang on the ceiling. All, as expected, heads down, and one - head up. The mice hanging nearby chatter:
- Why is she hanging upside down?
- And she does yoga!
The crow found a large piece of cheese. Then a fox suddenly jumped out from behind the bushes and slapped the crow on the head. The cheese fell out, the fox immediately grabbed it and ran away.
The stunned crow says with offense:
- Wow, they shortened the fable!
The zoo director, out of breath, comes running to the police station:
- For God's sake, help, our elephant has run away!
“Calm down, citizen,” said the policeman. - We will find your elephant. Name the special signs!
An owl flies and shouts:
- Uh-huh, uh-huh, uh-huh!..
Suddenly he hit a pole:
- Wow!
A Japanese schoolboy enters a company store selling watches.
— Do you have a reliable alarm clock?
“It couldn’t be more reliable,” the seller answers. “First the siren goes on, then an artillery salvo is heard, and a glass of cold water is poured on your face. If that doesn't work, the alarm clock rings the school and tells you that you have the flu!
Guide: - in front of you is a rare exhibit of our museum - a beautiful statue of a Greek warrior. Unfortunately, he is missing an arm and a leg, and his head is damaged in some places. The work is called "Winner".
Visitor: - Great! I'd like to see what's left of the vanquished one!
A foreign tourist arriving in Paris turns to a Frenchman:
“I come here for the fifth time, and I see that nothing has changed!”
- What should change? - he asks.
Tourist (points to the Eiffel Tower):
— In the end, did they find oil here or not?
One society lady asked Heine:
— What do you need to do to learn to speak French?
“It’s not difficult,” he answered, “you just need to use French instead of German words.”
In a history lesson in a French school:
—Who was the father of Louis the Sixteenth?
— Louis the Fifteenth.
- Fine. And Charles the Seventh?
— Charles the Sixth.
- And Francis the First? Well, what are you silent?
- Francis... Zero!
During a history lesson, the teacher said:
— Today we will repeat the old material. Natasha, ask Semenov a question.
Natasha thought and asked:
- What year was the war of 1812?
And everyone laughed.
The parents had no time, and grandfather went to the parent meeting. He arrived in a bad mood and immediately began to scold his grandson:
- Disgrace! It turns out that your history is full of bad marks! For example, I always got straight A's in this subject!
“Of course,” the grandson answered, “at the time when you were studying, history was much shorter!”
Baba Yaga asks Koshchei the Immortal:
— How did you relax during the New Year holidays?
“I shot myself a couple of times, drowned myself three times, hanged myself once—in general, I had fun!”
Winnie the Pooh congratulated the donkey on his birthday, and then said:
- Eeyore, you must be many years old?
- Why do you say that?
- Judging by your ears, you've been pulled on them often!
A client enters a photo studio and asks the receptionist:
— I wonder why everyone is laughing in your photographs?
- You should have seen our photographer!
-What are you complaining about? - the doctor asks the patient.
- You know, by the end of the day I just fall from fatigue.
- What do you do in the evenings?
— I play the violin.
— I recommend stopping music lessons immediately!
When the patient left, the nurse asked the doctor in surprise:
- Ivan Petrovich, what does music lessons have to do with it?
- Absolutely nothing to do with it. It’s just that this woman lives on the floor above me, and our soundproofing is disgusting!
“Yesterday I pulled a pike weighing twenty kilograms out of an ice hole!”
- Can't be!
- That's it, I thought that no one would believe me, so I let her out back...
The summer resident addresses the owner of the dacha:
— Could you please lower the rent for the room a little?
- What are you talking about? With such a beautiful view of the birch grove!
- What if I promise you that I won’t look out the window?
The millionaire shows his guest his villa and says:
“And here I’m going to build three pools: one with cold water, the second with warm water, and the third without water at all.”
- Without water? - the guest is surprised. - For what?
— The fact is that some of my friends don’t know how to swim...
At a painting exhibition, one visitor asks another:
— Do you think this picture depicts a sunrise or sunset?
- Of course, sunset.
- Why do you think so?
— I know this artist. He doesn't wake up before noon.
Buyer: - I would like to buy some book.
Seller: - Would you like something light?
Buyer: - It doesn’t matter, I’m driving!
An unknown young man set a world record in the 100-meter race. A journalist interviews him:
- How did you do it? Have you trained a lot in any sports club?
- No, at the shooting range. I work there replacing targets...
“I recently ran two kilometers in one minute at a school competition!”
- You're lying! This is better than a world record!
- Yes, but I know a shortcut!
It's a wonderful time - childhood! Carelessness, pranks, games, eternal “whys” and, of course, funny stories from the lives of children - funny, memorable, making you smile involuntarily.
Publicly warned
One mother of a beautiful six-year-old son often had no one to leave her not always obedient child at home with. Therefore, sometimes she takes the baby with her to work (to an exhibition). On one of these days, the driver calls my mother and asks her to pick up some booklets from the checkpoint. She leaves, and strictly orders her son to sit still and not go anywhere. In general, it takes a certain amount of time to find a driver, arrange and pick up booklets, and deliver them to the desired location. And so... Approaching her lady, she sees a bunch of people laughing and taking pictures of something at the stand. My son is not there! But there is a piece of paper A-4 attached to the stand, on which it is written in large letters: “I’ll be there soon. What am I!”
This same mother once asked dad to play with his son while she prepared dinner. After a while, he hears a whining voice from the room: “Dad, I’m tired... Can I go play?” Looking into the room, he sees the following picture: a father lying on the sofa, and a son in full uniform (helmet, cloak, sword), marching back and forth along the sofa. To the question: “What is this?” - my son answers: “Dad and I play King of the Sofa!” Such a funny story about children can not only make you plunge headlong into your own memories.
Shh! Dad is sleeping
And here is another funny story about children from life. One mother left a three-year-old child with his father for just a couple of hours. He comes and sees the following picture: dad is sleeping sweetly on the sofa, wearing a toy from (a bunny and a fox) on both hands. The child covered it with his small blanket, placed a high chair next to it, a cup of juice on it, and an obligatory attribute - a potty near the sofa. He closed the door and sat quietly in the corridor, and showed his mother when she came in: “Shhh! Dad sleeps there."
The child watched a fairy tale about Scheherazade and, impressed by such a magical film, says to his beloved grandmother, who is wearing a robe of oriental colors: “Grandma, what are you, Scheherazade?”
The baby does not eat well, and almost the whole family gathers to feed him. And everyone persuades the capricious boy to eat at least a spoonful. And even the grandfather says: “Don’t worry, grandson! When I was a child, I didn’t eat well, so my mother scolded me for it and even beat me.” To such a sincere confession, the granddaughter replies: “That’s what I see, grandpa, that all your teeth are false...”
Kitty Kitty Kitty
And this is a funny story about children from real life. One grandmother, a former site manager, who did not mince words at work and at home, spent a certain period raising her grandson. One fine day, this couple went to the store, where the grandmother had to stand in a long line. The grandson found this activity boring, and he decided to make friends with the store cat:
Kitty! Kitty, kitty, come here.
The cat, apparently, was not interested in these affections, and he hid under the counter. But the boy is persistent! The boy is persistent! Now he needs to get the cat at any cost:
Kitty, kitty-kitty, come to me, my dear.
The animal has zero reaction.
Kitty, ... fuck, come here to ..., I said, - the childish boyish voice continued. The line burst into laughter, and the grandmother, grabbing her grandson under her arm, quickly retreated. And it seems like I even stopped using swear words.
About home canning
Mom and son were salting and sorting out the broken ones. She threw them down the toilet. The following dialogue took place between her and the child who came out of the toilet:
Mom, stop salting mushrooms!
How is it?
Because you constantly taste them for salt.
And what from this?
So you’ve already started pooping with them! I myself saw them floating in the toilet.
Once upon a time there was a Little Red Riding Hood...
And this funny story is about children, or rather, about the child of one busy dad who recently had the opportunity to put his son to bed. And the baby ordered his dad to tell him an interesting bedtime story, namely his favorite one - about Little Red Riding Hood.
Once upon a time there was a little girl in the world, and her name was Little Red Riding Hood,” the father, who came home from work very tired, began his story.
“She went to visit her beloved grandmother,” he continued, already half asleep, unable to fight sleep himself.
He woke up because his son was indignantly pushing him in the side:
Dad! What were the police doing there and who is Yuri Gagarin?
Where's the child?
A funny story about children from real life about how a careless father forgot his child on a walk. And it was like this. He somehow took the initiative and proudly offered his candidacy for a walk with his five-month-old daughter on the street. Mom, knowing his irresponsibility, told him to take a walk near the house. After an hour and a half, the joyful dad returns, albeit alone. Mom almost turned gray without seeing the stroller with the child. And he, it turns out, met a friend, and since he was smoking, they moved aside so that the child would not breathe in the smoke. And dad forgot while talking about the child. So I came home. I had to urgently run to that place; It's good that everything worked out okay.
Here's a funny story about children in kindergarten. Dad came to the nursery to pick up his child for the first time. The children were still sleeping at that moment, and the teacher, busy with something, asked the dad to dress his child himself, only quietly, so as not to wake up the sleeping kids. In general, the picture that appeared before my mother was this: my beloved daughter in boyish pants, a shirt and someone else’s slippers. All weekend, the shocked woman represented the poor boy who, due to circumstances, had to wear a pink dress. And all because dad confused the chair with clothes.
Funny stories about little children
A 4-year-old daughter comes running to her mother asking if she will be an apple.
Of course,” says the satisfied mother, “did you wash them?”
Only later did the mother realize that the only place where her daughter could wash the fruit was the toilet, because that was the only place the baby could get it.
Funny stories from the lives of children are found at every step, and even in the central department store, where one fine day a mother and her 4-year-old son were walking. They pass by the department for newlyweds.
Mom,” says the baby, “let’s buy you such a beautiful white dress.”
What are you doing, son! This dress is for a bride who is getting married.
“And you will come out, don’t worry,” the boy reassures.
So I'm already married, son.
Yes? - the baby is surprised. - Who did you marry and didn’t tell me?
So this is your dad!
Well, it’s good that it’s not some unfamiliar guy,” the boy said, having calmed down.
Mom, buy a phone
A 5-year-old son asks his mother to buy him a mobile phone.
Why do you need him? - Mom is interested.
“I need it very much,” the boy answers.
So, but still? Why do you need a phone? - the parent asks.
So you and teacher Maria Ivanovna always scold me for not eating well in kindergarten. And so I will call you and tell you to give me cutlets.
No less funny story about children. This time we will remember the conversation between a 4-year-old child and his grandmother.
Grandma, please give birth to a baby, otherwise I have no one to play with. Mom and Dad don't have time.
So how do I give birth? “I won’t be able to give birth to anyone anymore,” the grandmother answers.
A! “I understand,” Roma guessed. - You are a male! I saw the program on TV.
On the path...
Funny stories from the lives of children always bring us back to childhood - light, carefree and so naive!
Before leaving home, teacher Elena Andreevna says to a 3-year-old boy:
We go outside, we will walk there and wait for mom. So go down the path to the toilet.
The boy left and disappeared. The teacher, without waiting for the baby, went in search of him. Going out into the corridor, he sees the following picture: a confused boy stands between the two with an expression of complete bewilderment on his face and says:
Elena Andreevna, did you say which path to go to the toilet on: blue or red?
Here's a funny story about children.
The Motherland is calling!
Funny stories from the lives of children at school also amaze with the unpredictability of students, their antics and resourcefulness. In one class there was a boy named Rodin. And his mother was a teacher at the same school. Once she asked one schoolboy to call her son from class. He flies into the classroom and shouts:
Motherland is calling!
The first reaction of students and teachers is numbness, misunderstanding, fear...
After the words: “Rodin, come out, your mother is calling you,” the class fell under their desks with laughter.
In one school, a teacher dictated an essay to elementary school students based on Prishvin’s work. The meaning was how hard the life of a bunny in the forest is, how everyone offends him, how he has to get his own food in the cold winter. One day the animal found a rowan bush in the forest and began to eat the berries. Literally, the last phrase of the dictation sounded like this: “The furry animal is full.”
In the evening, the teacher simply cried over her essays. Literally all the students wrote the word “full” with two letters “s”.
At another school, one student constantly wrote the word “walk” with an “o” (“shol”). The teacher got tired of correcting his mistakes all the time, and after lessons she forced the student to write the word “walked” on the board a hundred times. The boy coped with the task perfectly, and at the end he wrote: “I left.”
Competition for the funniest literary opus
Send us withyour short funny stories,
really happened in your life.
Wonderful prizes await the winners!
Be sure to indicate:
1. Last name, first name, age
2. Title of the work
3. Email address
Winners are determined in three age groups:
Group 1 - up to 7 years old
Group 2 - from 7 to 10 years old
Group 3 - over 10 years old
Competition works:
Didn't deceive...
This morning, as usual, I go for a light jog. Suddenly a cry from behind - uncle, uncle! I stop and see a girl of about 11-12 years old with a Caucasian Shepherd dog rushing towards me, continuing to shout: “Uncle, uncle!” I, thinking that something happened, go towards it. When there were 5 meters left before our meeting, the girl was able to say the phrase to the end:
Uncle, I'm sorry, but she's going to bite you!!!
Didn't deceive...
Sofya Batrakova, 10 years old
Salty tea
It happened one morning. I got up and went to the kitchen to drink tea. I did everything automatically: I poured the tea leaves, boiling water and put in 2 tablespoons of granulated sugar. She sat down at the table and began to drink tea with pleasure, but it was not sweet tea, but salty! When I woke up, I put salt instead of sugar.
My relatives made fun of me for a long time.
Guys, draw conclusions: go to bed on time so as not to drink salty tea in the morning!!!
Agata Popova, student of Municipal Educational Institution "Secondary School No. 2, Kondopoga
Quiet hour for seedlings
The grandmother and her grandson decided to plant tomato seedlings. Together they poured soil, planted seeds, and watered them. Every day the grandson looked forward to the appearance of sprouts. So the first shoots appeared. How much joy there was! The seedlings grew by leaps and bounds. One evening, the grandmother told her grandson that tomorrow morning we would go to the garden to plant seedlings... In the morning, the grandmother woke up early, and what a surprise she was: all the seedlings were lying there. The grandmother asks her grandson: “What happened to our seedlings?” And the grandson proudly replies: “I put our seedlings to sleep!”
School snake
After the summer, after the summer
I'm flying on wings to class!
Together again - Kolya, Sveta,
Olya, Tolya, Katya, Stas!
How many stamps and postcards,
Butterflies, beetles, snails.
Stones, glass, shells.
Variegated cuckoo eggs.
This is a hawk's claw.
Here is the herbarium! - Don't touch it!
I take it out of my bag,
What would you think?.. A snake!
Where is the noise and laughter now?
It’s like the wind blew everyone away!
Dasha Balashova, 11 years old
Rabbit peace
One day I went to the market to do some shopping. I stood in line for meat, and a guy stood in front of me, looked at the meat, and there was a sign with the inscription “Rabbit of the World.” The guy probably didn’t immediately understand that “Rabbit of the World” is the name of the saleswoman, and now his turn comes, and he says: “Give me 300-400 grams of the rabbit of the world,” he says - very interesting, I’ve never tried it. The saleswoman looks up and says: “Mira Rabbit is me.” The whole line was just lying there laughing.
Nastya Bogunenko, 14 years old
Competition winner – Ksyusha Alekseeva, 11 years old,
who sent this funny joke:
I am Pushkin!
One day in fourth grade we were assigned to learn a poem. Finally the day came when everyone had to tell it. Andrey Alekseev was the first to go to the board (he has nothing to lose, because his name is in front of everyone else in the class magazine). So he recited a poem expressively, and the literature teacher, who came to our lesson to replace our teacher, asks his first and last name. And it seemed to Andrei that he was asked to name the author of the poem he had learned. Then he said so confidently and loudly: “Alexander Pushkin.” Then the whole class roared with laughter along with the new teacher.
COMPETITION CLOSED