Why am I afraid to answer the phone? Let's deal with "I can"

Hold the phone, I've already dialed the number!!!

Hello, Megapolis company, hello?..

Hello, uh...

Don’t torment a newbie, he won’t answer anything, and if he tries, the only question is which phrase he will fall down on. This article will be useful both to call center managers and to novice operators themselves. Fear is overcome by struggle, it does not happen quickly, so you should be patient so as not to be afraid to call and sell.

START - warm calls

Adaptation is what accompanies a person in learning any matter. Adaptation goes hand in hand with stress, and together this couple will squeeze the juice out of anyone. A smart approach is to simplify the negative impact of an aggressive environment when learning a craft. As a rule, people are afraid that they are not expected at the other end of the line. Conclusion - you need to call the databases where they are waiting for you. In any telemarketing department or contact center there is always a front line of work in the field of warm calls, but someone is pushing the sales funnel?!

The first warm calls to people interested in a conversation will let the person understand that a telephone conversation is not always negative, sometimes subscribers are waiting for a call and are very happy about the operator’s information. Warm call therapy is optimally carried out over 3 to 7 working days. “Bayaka” must wake up for several days with the awareness of his new activity and get used to the hitherto unfamiliar habitat, as they say, “you have to sleep with it.”

Sit in the same trench and overcome the fear of cold calling

The next stage is to understand that there is such a thing as conversion. For every 100 calls there are always 1-2 successful ones. The problem is that when a person tries alone to overcome his fear of cold sales, he cannot with a cold mind realize the obviousness of the existence of successful calls. This is because it is psychologically difficult for the operator; any new task is exhausting and deprives him of sober thinking. Give him a chance to come to realization through passive observation of professionals. To do this, you need to sit for 2-3 days next to an experienced specialist and listen to how, out of hundreds of calls, sales are made, albeit only a few! If you do this, then when you get on the line, a person will think not about what he will not succeed, but about how many positive responses he will have for a hundred calls. This is the second step in defeating fear, and without it it can sometimes be unbearably difficult.

“I’m a robot and I don’t have a heart” - script by heart, phone in hand

There is a proven Chinese approach - copy tirelessly until you start to get a quality product. We all remember what things made in China looked like 20 years ago - then it was impossible to wear clothes for a long period, and play with toys for more than 1 day, everything was torn and broken. Time has passed, and the quality of the product has changed significantly.

It’s the same in the operator’s business, but it takes weeks, not years. Having learned the script properly, you need to call, call and call again. After 100-200 calls, it makes sense to make your own adjustments to the script that correspond to the realities of the project. At this stage of the fight against fear, the method of treating the operator like a soldier works well - you are a robot, you should not think, others will think for you, call until your ear turns red and your tongue goes numb. At this time, confidence and understanding of the essence of the quantitative approach is gained - more calls, more conversion. Monotonous performance of one's duties without emotional perception of the result of work develops a habit, which in turn trains the psyche.

1000 calls – first conclusions

The first month of work is not only indicative as a calendar period, but also because about 1000 calls are made during this time. Along with the conversion numbers, fear disappears for most operators, giving way to awareness and the first conclusions. A small percentage of people begin to get excited about victories, business communication skills and, of course, sales bonuses. They are future telesales professionals.

Most simply get rid of fear and agree to continue going with the flow. This gray mass will then form the basis of the call center team, later it will get better and will show a satisfactory, unremarkable, but some kind of result.

And the last group of those tested by fear are those who failed. There is no need to continue to break yourself, this is the destruction of the personality and budget of the call center. Further training of such characters will be accompanied by costs for the company and nervous breakdowns for the people themselves.

Analysis, creativity, END of career

So we said goodbye to the incorrigible “tales”, what next... Everything is somewhat more positive than it seems.

The majority who prefer to go with the flow will eventually get rid of fear, and then, without reaching heights, they will work for 1-2 years in the operator’s room and go with the flow of their work activity at a new place of work. During these two years, their fear will replace indifference to the interlocutor, and the cold calm on the phone will be born from the routine of daily work in a call center.

Those who are interested in cold calling will, within a few months, come to the process of honing their filigree sales skills. Fear will be replaced by interest in identifying the psychotypes of interlocutors. Soon, with great enthusiasm, they will determine the type of subscriber on the fly and implement the corresponding script branch or their own cold sales technique.

Why you shouldn't be afraid of cold calling

Today, business trainers never tire of repeating: get pleasure from calls, but how can you get it when, in fact, you impose yourself on people who are already angry and tired without you. There is such a thing, if not for the stubborn facts - cold calls work, and for those who are not afraid of them in the first place.

Why do cold calls work? Yes, because in the general population there is always a percentage of those who desperately need the service right now and today. Don't believe me? Ask yourself what do you need now? Put money on your phone, deliver pizza for lunch, do a coursework, do your hair, maybe hang a picture at home or fix a faucet?.. Something is definitely required, the only question is whether there will be a caller with an offer to solve your problem. Become that caller, solve someone else’s problem, this person has been waiting for you!

Those who start cold calling sooner or later become interested in . How to do this and how to get contacts of the head of the company at any cost, read in the previous article.

Illustration copyright Getty Images

Do you panic when you hear your phone ringing? Terrified at the mere thought of calling someone? The observer knows what to do.

Today we rarely leave our mobile phones, but many people still experience a genuine and deep fear of phone calls.

Telephobia, recognized as a type of social anxiety disorder, affects people of different generations and from different countries.

Those who suffer from telephobia can comfortably give a speech in front of a huge room full of strangers or send dozens of text messages a day, but shudder in horror when they have to make a simple phone call.

"For many people, talking on the phone is a particularly difficult type of communication," says Jill Eisenstadt, vice president of Joyable, an online counseling company. “You need to think quickly about everything and immediately respond to the words of your interlocutor.”

You need to think quickly about everything and immediately respond to the words of your interlocutor

Modern technologies, which have created conditions for indirect communication, to a certain extent mask the problem of telephobia. As a result, it becomes more difficult to detect, and therefore there are no accurate data on the prevalence of telephobia.

However, fear of talking on the phone can have an extremely negative impact on productivity and labor mobility.

“Some of our clients fail to achieve success in their careers because they are afraid to communicate with other people,” says Eisenstadt. “They avoid conversations until the last minute.”

Stupid look

Telephobia as a phenomenon arose long before the advent of smartphones.

George Dudley and Shannon Goodson wrote the book The Psychology of Fear: Why People Are Afraid to Call Customers back in 1986.

And in 1929, the British poet and writer Robert Graves wrote in his autobiography that he developed a deep fear of using the telephone after being wounded during the First World War.

It's not about the phone itself, it's about communication

Eisenstadt is familiar with more recent cases of telephobia. The phone makes her patients anxious for a variety of reasons.

“It’s not about the phone itself, but about communication,” she says. “For some clients, talking on the phone is an extra risk of blurting out something unnecessary.”

One 27-year-old patient, Eisenstadt, who works in sales, fears that she will start to stammer or pause too long in conversations and thereby make herself look bad in front of clients and colleagues.

Illustration copyright Getty Images Image caption Those who suffer from telephobia may send dozens of text messages a day but still tremble at the thought of talking on the phone.

Another patient, a 52-year-old financial consultant, also worries about looking stupid on the phone.

Now she communicates with clients only by email so that she can compose a competent response and double-check it.

Sales trainer Jeff Shore says many sales professionals are afraid to make so-called cold calls because they don't want to seem intrusive to potential clients.

With the advent of telephone marketing, the telephone began to be seen as a nuisance that could disrupt a family dinner or distract a person from a favorite activity.

Shore says those he works with are afraid of irritating the person on the other end of the line.

"Sales people say, 'These calls are annoying and I don't want to get them or make them myself,'" he says.

Differences in cultural norms

According to Michael Landers, global director of Culture Crossing, which provides group and individual counseling on intercultural communication, in some cultures people are wary of making phone calls.

Phone anxiety across cultures is closely linked to fear of rejection.

“The Japanese, for example, find it difficult to decide to have a conversation with a stranger - they are afraid of offending the interlocutor or losing face,” explains Landers.

In Indonesia, where the average person sends about a hundred text messages a day, this method of communication is simply considered more convenient than phone calls.

According to Landers, fear of the phone across cultures is closely related to the fear of being rejected, regardless of whether the issue being discussed is setting up a meeting or closing a deal.

“I don’t know of any culture that welcomes refusal,” he says. “However, everyone’s understanding of refusal is different.”

Acquire a skill

To help their patients cope with their fear of the phone, many psychotherapists use cognitive behavioral therapy methods.

Eisenstadt asks patients to describe the anxious thoughts they have about their phone conversations and discusses worst-case scenarios with them.

"We help them understand that it's not scary or dangerous," she says.

Illustration copyright Thinkstock Image caption Can't decide to make a phone call? Try to imagine the worst case scenario... It's not that scary, right?

Over time, they get into practice and start making small calls - for example, ordering pizza.

He also advises understanding for yourself how the caller can be useful to the person on the other end of the line.

“The most important thing is to have the right motivation,” he says. When a sales professional understands how he can help a potential client, it becomes easier for him to make those cold calls.

"When you discover that your worst fears are not realized, your perception of cold calling changes," Shore explains.

And if a person himself does not understand what the benefit of his call is, there is no point in calling at all.

Illustration copyright Robert Gunn Image caption Molly Irani, director of hospitality at Chai Pani Restaurant Group, now communicates with colleagues primarily via text messages.

Telephobia is most often studied in sales professionals, but it affects people in a variety of professions, from journalists and public relations specialists to secretaries, lawyers, consultants and many other workers who have to receive and make calls as part of their job duties.

Telephobia can even prevent you from getting a job if a job candidate panics at the thought of a telephone interview.

Sometimes managers have to adapt to the habits of their employees.

Molly Irani is the Director of Hospitality at Chai Pani Restaurant Group, which owns restaurants in Asheville, North Carolina and Atlanta, Georgia.

She says the company employs 180 people, but Irani can count the number of people who answer her call on one hand.

She says she's gotten used to texting employees, many of whom are under 35.

Illustration copyright Thinkstock Image caption The call may take you by surprise. What if two phones ring at once?

Irani understands his colleagues' dislike of the phone. A call can take you by surprise when you are simply not ready to talk to anyone.

She says things have changed, and her younger employees can avoid the awkward situations that arise on the phone thanks to numerous alternative means of communication.

“Many of us have experienced this hostility, but we had no choice but to overcome it,” says Irani. “We have acquired this skill, but the new generation does not have to do it.”

Five ways to cope with telephobia

Think about the worst case scenario - usually things are not as bad as you think.
Think about why you need a call - to inform a client or get important information?
Think in advance about how you will start and end the conversation - ending a conversation gracefully is often the hardest thing to do.
To practice, start with small calls that don't involve major risks - for example, calling a food delivery service.
Remember that no one expects you to be perfect in everything.

“I’m afraid to talk on the phone” - if this phrase is familiar to you, then this article is what you were looking for. You will learn for what reasons such a phobia may develop. You will learn valuable tips on how to cope with such fears.

Causes

There is a reason why a woman or man is afraid to call or communicate with strangers on the phone. The appearance of such fear is influenced by a number of factors. We will look at the main ones.

Fear that the interlocutor will begin to speak negatively and be rude.
Self-doubt, fear that you won’t be able to formulate your thoughts correctly.
Lack of ability to maintain the thread of a conversation. Characteristic at .
Problem of communication in the absence of visual contact.
Having negative experiences in the past. For example, a difficult conversation took place earlier, the person was rude, threatened or abandoned via a phone call.
Lack of practice. A person may be afraid because this type of communication has rarely occurred.
A person is afraid to call about work because he is very worried. It's hard to maintain communication when you don't see how the other person reacts to your words. And this is sometimes very important when applying for a new place. In addition, you may experience great fear that you will not be able to make the right impression on your employer over the phone. There is also a risk that the applicant will become confused and will not be able to answer the questions asked correctly.

Possible difficulties

In the modern world, the inability to talk on the phone significantly worsens the quality of life. Let's look at what exactly awaits you by avoiding such communication.

Business opportunities are significantly reduced.
Missing vital calls.
A constant feeling of anxiety when your mobile phone rings causes persistent stress.

Conversation rules

When talking on the phone, you need to maintain the correct intonation. It is she who conveys your mood.
Avoid the habit of interrupting your interlocutor. Try to match his speaking speed.
If they called you at the wrong time, don’t be afraid to say so, ask to call back after a certain time.
If you didn’t hear something during the conversation or misunderstood it, it’s better to ask again. Especially if the call was for work.
If you accidentally dropped a call or accidentally hung up during a call, don’t be afraid to call back, apologize and continue the conversation.

What to do

First of all, you need to determine what exactly scares you when you dial a phone number.
Determine the benefit of being able to talk without face-to-face contact.
Even an aggressive conversation should not upset you if you are talking with a stranger. This is his problem, since he is so ill-mannered. Realize that you won’t have to talk to him anymore, don’t take his statements to heart.
If you have a business conversation and you are worried that you will forget something or say the wrong thing, then prepare the text of the speech in advance.
Don’t forget to start the conversation with a greeting, followed by prepared questions, and then a farewell with wishes for a good day.
You can take care of creating certain phrases that will help in cases where you are caught by an unexpected question. This way you can stall for time.
You can practice your speech before the call. For example, talk with your mobile phone turned off.
Alternatively, in order to give yourself confidence, you can record your speech on a voice recorder. Then listen to it, make sure everything sounds correct and beautiful. If necessary, correct it.
Before you call, have a piece of paper and pen ready in case you have to write something down.

There was a time in my life when I was worried about how and what to say on the phone. When I was expecting an important call, I almost jumped from nervous tension when the call came. In addition to the fear of being misunderstood or saying the wrong thing, I was upset by the lack of visual contact with the interlocutor. Working on myself helped me cope with my worries.

To avoid the thought “I’m afraid to call people,” you need to practice as often as possible.

To make it easier for you, start by calling relatives, then move on to friends. When you have to make an important business conversation on the phone, you won’t be afraid anymore.
If you have difficulty speaking because you can’t see your interlocutor, you can mentally imagine what he looks like. Alternatively, you can talk on the phone in front of a mirror.
When you are about to make a call, smile. Of course, no one will see you, but this way you will be able to relax and the tension will subside.
If you have had a traumatic conversation in the past, you need to realize that not every conversation will end this way. Perhaps this will never happen again in my entire life. And if it happens, not necessarily during a telephone conversation, maybe during a personal conversation. There is no need to be afraid to live. And if it is very difficult to control yourself and survive a past trauma, then you should turn to a specialist for qualified help.
If, while dialing a phone number, you are too tense and feel serious anxiety, you can practice self-hypnosis. Your task is to convince yourself that you are not afraid of anything, try to relax, close your eyes, breathe deeply, imagine how confidently you are talking to your interlocutor without seeing him.
Before making a call, make sure that there are no distractions. Make sure children do not enter the room, turn off the TV.
Prepare yourself in advance for the fact that the answer at the other end of the line may not be the person you are calling or even an answering machine. Think about what you need to say.
It is recommended to drink a small amount of water before the call. Excitement may cause your throat to become dry.
Before calling, clear your throat and say something out loud. Make sure your voice sounds correct and not hoarse from nerves.
Don't think that you are the only one who is nervous when making a call. It is possible that the interlocutor is also worried.

Now you know what to do if you are worried about the problem “I’m afraid to call on the phone.” Try to find strength within yourself and overcome your fear. You must understand that in the modern world you cannot do without this method of communication. If the problem lies in previous stress, then consulting a psychologist will be better.

It’s even surprising that in our advanced technological age there are strangely many individuals who eschew telephone communication. To come to the other end of the city for a conversation, to write a hundred letters in small handwriting, to send a snow-white carrier pigeon with valuable information - people are willing to endure serious inconvenience just to avoid talking on the phone. To say that such a feature does not contribute to a productive business or personal life is to say nothing.

They helped us:

Lyudmila Boldyreva
Psychologist, coach

Antonina Dudareva
Psychologist

Maria Razbash
Psychologist, leading trainer at the A. Sviyash Center for Positive Psychology

According to psychologists, there may be several reasons for dislike of telephone communication: fear of hearing something negative addressed to oneself and encountering banal rudeness; lack of confidence in one’s own ability to formulate thoughts clearly and clearly; difficulties with the ability to concentrate on details and maintain the thread of a conversation - the latter is characteristic of people with attention deficit disorder.

A narrowed, compared to others, information channel of communication between people also makes a negative contribution - in simple terms, the lack of visual contact. “When making a phone call, there are only words, voice, intonation, but there are no other usual (often unconscious, but no less necessary for a person) sources of information,” says psychologist Antonina Dudareva. “The main one is visual: we can’t see the reaction, we can’t use eye contact, facial expressions and pantomime, either ours or our interlocutor’s, so we get nervous.”

What to do: First, ask yourself a couple of questions: “What am I afraid of when I need to dial a number?” and “What is useful in such calls?” The answers should help neutralize the fear. Are you afraid that you will be rude? So what if you have never seen the person on the other end of the line and are unlikely to ever meet it? What's the worst thing that will happen if you call a client or partner with an offer?, but will you listen to the refusal? That's right - well, the mood will deteriorate a little, that's all. Think not only about yourself, but also about those around you: what if the information you want to convey is exactly what they need now? And you are hesitating!

The second stage - you will have to cope with anxiety. In order not to be nervous and not to stumble during an important call, such as a business call, prepare for it in advance.

Write the text of the conversation. Start with a greeting, list all the questions that need to be asked and points that need to be clarified, and end with a goodbye.
Come up with a few help phrases - with the help of them you will stall for time if you need to answer an unexpected question.
Practice your speech a couple of times, turn off all extraneous thoughts and dial the number. When they answer “Hello” at the other end of the line, there will be nowhere to retreat.

As an additional support, you can use a voice recorder: record the upcoming conversation on it, listen to it several times, adjust your speech if necessary, and, making sure that you clearly express your thoughts, dial the number. Yes, and don’t forget to visualize the image of the person on the other end of the line - this will help in overcoming fear.

“The universal recipe in such a situation is: take it and do it,” says psychologist Antonina Dudareva. - AND The more often you practice telephone conversations, the easier they will be for you.. I saw a poster with the name of a concert - dial the number indicated on it and find out all the information about the event, even if you are not very interested. If you need to buy something, call several stores and compare conditions. In general, look for “safe” practices to overcome your fear of talking on the phone.” And you won’t even notice how a business call will become a means of solving your problems, rather than creating them.

For a new business consultant, making phone calls is a new thing. Our brain is designed in such a way that at the level of instinct it protects the owner from everything unknown and includes fears. Fear of talking about yourself and offering business is normal. What we are afraid of seems prohibitively difficult, and what is difficult we put off until later and do not do.

Like at school, remember? Lessons later, prepare for exams later. Undone work accumulates, the conscience gnaws, the strength of intention weakens... The business ends. I won’t tell you how to correctly write a script and make a call. I will share my secrets on how to stop being afraid to make calls. The mentor says that I do it well. Everything is very simple.

Think of calls like this: “I want” - “I can” - “I act” - “I receive”

Let's see how it works? One day, a colleague gave me a magnet with a wonderful cup of coffee on it and the inscription “I can’t be stopped if I can start.” We need to take the first step. Phew... that word is needed again. Who needs? I need. What for? I don't need it, I'm afraid to call. Instead of “I want”, “I must” was imprinted in the subconscious from childhood. And who needs a child not to go where he shouldn’t? A child and a citizen must be obedient, and what he wants is of no interest to anyone. But that’s what interests you! What are your dreams? What about the goals? When the goal is through “I want”, you get drive and buzz, and the person is realized. The biggest problem. Same with calls.

Before making calls again, take 1 minute to remember your “I want” and say it

Do you really want change? Or will it work as before? Friends, believe that you are not the person you used to think of yourself as. Every person is a diamond whose light is meant to shine on the world. Sit down to make calls only with this mindset to yourself. You are unique. The second setting is that you clearly understand what you want and remember this always when you pick up your phone. Remember about the carrot on the fishing rod in front of the donkey? And that’s it, the donkey wants a carrot and runs. If you want it, then others want it too, all that’s left is to find each other. “I want” is sorted out.

Let's deal with "I can"

If we were at a training session now, and I asked you (I was once asked): “Raise your hand, who thinks that they cannot manage the Gazprom company?” Would you pick it up or not? I picked it up. It's about our limiting beliefs. Limiting beliefs are thoughts that hinder our actions. They are like a cage that we have driven ourselves into and can no longer escape. Can. We change our worldview. Unfortunately, they are also from previous life experiences.

Since childhood, we are taught to see only disadvantages in a world of pros. Change the limiting beliefs “No one needs this” to the supportive ones “People are looking for opportunities and therefore are waiting for my call.” Find your limiting beliefs, think about them carefully, change them and write them down. The results of this work will surprise you. You will be in excellent resource condition. Calls will no longer be a problem, because further actions become conscious and aimed at making your dreams come true. Don't hesitate for a minute, act.

Now about “Acting”

There is a third secret here and it is to love the process. Everyone has hobbies or hobbies, some like to skate, some like to swim, sew, spend time with a child, or whatever, we are all different. I like running. Why are we doing this? We love to do this, at these moments we are happy. It is when we are looking for our key people that we move our business. The business is moving, there is a result, and we are happy.

Do you want to be happy? Take action. When you are getting ready for a long time, return to “I want” and “I can”, and also, before calling using a script, just call a good person (friend, colleague, loved one) and just start talking, end the conversation with a smile and start making calls with a smile business. Do it, get results, and you will feel good!