Each of us sometimes has to deal with human rudeness and listen to offensive words and expressions addressed to us. Some people have a tense atmosphere at home, while others are very unlucky at work, where a scandalous atmosphere prevails, ready at any moment to explode in a stream of abuse and insults. So how to respond to rudeness and rudeness?
Why do you need to respond to rudeness and not remain silent?
Psychologists have found that every aggressive act from the outside gives rise to auto-aggression in a normal person, which over time results in a depressed mood, decreased performance, low self-esteem, etc. This reaction of the body does not bring anything good with it, and, therefore, you need to learn how to effectively protect yourself from manifestations of foreign aggression and the correct reaction to it.
Reasons for rude behavior
One of the most common reasons for rude attacks on a person is his underdevelopment. Such people are much more likely to become victims of rudeness than strong and self-confident individuals. Boors and rude people have a fairly well-developed instinct and will never get involved with someone who can give them a worthy answer.
If in front of them is a person from a different category, then why not amuse yourself and say something rude to him. Most often, the following types of people are among the offended:
- highly cultured and brought up in old traditions;
- having low self-esteem;
- trying to avoid conflict situations;
- with a high sense of guilt;
- fearful of hurting and offending other people.
In this situation, the reaction to rudeness may be different, but first you should work on your own so as not to be a constant victim of poorly behaved citizens. Finding inner strength will forever get rid of outside aggression, because a strong person cannot be an object of attack.
Unfortunately, almost every person in everyday life is forced to deal with rudeness and rudeness. We hear a stream of swear words in response to the remark that our leg was crushed on public transport. The boss scolded us in a harsh verbal form for five minutes. One of our friends scolded us because you returned the debt to him two days later than due. There can be any number of similar situations. Of course, it is terribly offensive to hear offensive expressions addressed to you, especially when they are undeserved. I just want to say to my offender: “You’re a fool!” However, one should not be above this. Try to respond to an insult in a non-standard form, without obscenity or vulgarity.
“How to be rude beautifully?” - a question that really deserves separate analysis. Those who will forever be able to understand the answer to it will have the opportunity to not lose their dignity under any circumstances or life troubles.
So, let's move on to consider the question of how to be rude beautifully.
Rude, who is he?
As a rule, boors are people with an unbalanced psyche and which they want to improve by insulting others. Moreover, it doesn’t matter at all to them whether they are actually guilty. They just need to “take their anger out” on someone. It would seem, how can one be rude to such people in a beautiful way, since it is generally impossible to communicate with them? In fact, their potential victims simply cannot resist their onslaught. Why? Character traits just don't allow it. First of all, people with a heightened sense of duty cannot fight back a rude person. They always feel guilty, no matter what they do, so they are easy prey for a boor. Secondly, insecure people cannot adequately respond to an insult - their pride is so deeply hidden that they cannot come up with anything smarter than, in response to the curse of others, loudly shouting at them or using obscene language addressed to them.
This form of “intelligence” prevents them from adequately responding to their offender, and they try to avoid communication with him in principle. What should the above categories of people do when someone insults them? In this case, we recommend the following: learn to be rude beautifully - 1000 non-standard answers will help you give a worthy rebuff to the offender. That's all.
How to adequately respond to rudeness?
And yet, how to be rude beautifully? First of all, there is one important thing to understand: there is no need to stoop to the level of your abuser. Otherwise, you admit your failure in terms of culture of communication and education. So, let's be rude beautifully! Make your impudent interlocutor feel like a real idiot and fool in the eyes of others: in this case, his pride will be hurt, and you will become the winner in a verbal duel. Therefore, we are rude in a beautiful way so that he understands how pathetic he looks, pouring curses on your head. And for this you must show maximum erudition, intelligence and self-confidence.
What is beautiful rudeness? In simple terms, this is a joke veiled in a polite (cultural) phrase. There seems to be no obscenity in the words, and mocking intonations put the offender in a bad light. For example, you can get rid of an intrusive interlocutor with the phrase: “I can’t remember your name and please don’t help me with this!” or “Talk, talk... I always yawn when I'm interested!”
Simply put, we learn to be rude beautifully, period.
What do you need to remember?
Know how to react in the correct form to the “sharp” attacks of your loved ones and friends. If you are deliberately incited to quarrel, then resort to the following psychological methods of influence:
1) Trolling in a mild form. Regular participants in forums and chats are familiar with this term. Its essence is this: if they start rude to you, then we turn into an intellectual and pour daring words on your head like: “Your mind is like a steel trap that always slams shut when you try to find an answer!” or “As an outsider, what do you think about the human race?”
2) Question to question. We learn to be rude beautifully and, instead of answering a barb, we ask a counter question: “I can’t talk to you right now, tell me, where will you be in ten years?” or “You’ve lost your list, who should you be afraid of?”
3) Misunderstanding. In response to an attack, show with all your appearance that you did not understand your interlocutor: “Excuse me, what did you say? My ears are clogged today.”
4) Humor. This quality will save you in any life circumstances. You can always be rude to him beautifully. Phrases “Don’t make me angry, I have nowhere to hide the corpses!” Come on, I’m kidding, I’m kidding, there’s still room”, “Yes, girl, you won’t save the world with beauty”, “Go, lie down, preferably on the rails” - a clear confirmation of this.
5) Consent. Agree with what the abuser told you:
Don't jump in line, you bastard!
Yes, I’m like that, that’s why I jump in line. The absence of an argument seems to disarm the rude person, and he stops pestering you.
6) Allergies. When you hear an insult addressed to you, start coughing and sneezing, and then get ready to be rude in a beautiful way. The phrases “Sorry, but I’m allergic to verbal diarrhea”, “I start coughing when I realize that the human mind can outshine the light of a floor lamp” will come in handy.
7) Disappointment. You can cool down the ardor of the offender with your own disappointment in him: “I thought you were a man with a capital letter, but it turns out that you are just a man with a small letter,” “Intelligence like a shell.”
Do not position your rude interlocutor as “the embodiment of evil”, do not try to anger him even more, but try to eradicate his terrible vices in him.
How to be rude to friends in the correct form?
Of course, we should not forget that being rude to your family and friends is not only uncivilized, but also vile.
At the same time, circumstances often arise in which a friend or loved one expresses outright rudeness towards you. The reason for this behavior may lie in a simple attempt to assert oneself and prove one’s superiority. Such is human nature. Naturally, in this case too, we learn to be rude beautifully: there are 1000 non-standard responses to curses, slander and rudeness. Try to react calmly and even with a subtle smile to all barbs from loved ones. For example, “I don’t like boors. Why do I need competitors?”, “My treasure! Remember once and before sclerosis!” or “I would probably offend you, but I’m afraid that I still won’t be able to do better than Mother Nature.” These responses are ideal for attacks from relatives or friends. The main trump cards in communicating with them are positive sarcasm and
How to be rude to strangers in the correct form?
It often happens that you hear rudeness and abuse from people you barely know or even strangers. For example, a saleswoman in a supermarket was rude to you. Quite a common situation, isn't it? How to react to her barbs? Again, we learn to be rude beautifully.
Non-standard answers will discourage her from being rude to other customers. What can you say to a trade worker? You can react as follows: “It’s a pity that I’m too busy to cherish your complexes” or “I understand that you are trying to compensate for your mental deficiency by shouting?” If a stranger is rude to you on the street, we recommend giving the following answer: “I don’t care what you think about me...I don’t think about you at all!”
civil servants?
Today, employees of pension funds, city administrations and other government agencies are not too picky in their expressions when communicating with people. In this case, the technique called “learning to be rude beautifully” is not applicable. Phrases, witticisms and ironic statements are inappropriate and meaningless here. If you were rude at a government agency, then write a complaint to your superiors, and hypothetically you can imagine how garbage from a large bucket is poured onto your offender’s head - this will help calm your nerves after the insult.
Your reaction to the insult
What to do when you are inadvertently or deliberately offended verbally? The main thing is not to take the insult personally. You must understand that the insolent person was rude to you not because he had a hostile attitude towards you, but only because he was poorly brought up or was in a bad mood. In other words, your person has nothing to do with it. You should also take into account the fact that in most cases your abuser does his dirty work impulsively, because he is a hostage to his violent and irrepressible character.
As has already been emphasized, insulting or uttering a curse word against someone is a certain way of self-affirmation, a demonstration of one’s “I,” a manifestation of egocentrism, which the offender lacks in everyday life, since he leads the life of a “little mouse.”
What to do first?
When a stranger lashes out at you, the best way out of the situation is to ignore the offender. Just try not to notice his presence, and after a while he will be distracted from your person. However, this technique does not always work. Then we learn to be rude beautifully. “You will open your mouth at the dentist” - this is your reaction to the slander of a rude person.
If the employer offended you with words
Many, having heard offensive expressions from their boss, try to ignore them. “What can you do, they can fire you if you say something against it!” - people will say. In fact, you need to learn to defend your interests as an employee and not allow management to throw accusations left and right. Believe me, no one will fire you for having dignity and your own point of view when it comes to unfair accusations.
If a loved one is offended by words
When you are insulted by a loved one, the most correct solution to the problem is to show your cards and have a heart-to-heart talk with him in a calm atmosphere. In 99% of cases, it is possible to determine the true cause of the disagreement.
Let's learn how to be rude beautifully or how to politely put people in their place!
How to answer without losing your temper and without stooping to the level of your interlocutor?
1. To talk with you on the same level, I need to lie down!..
2. I don’t know what you eat for breakfast, but it really works! Intelligence tends to zero!
3. Just don’t take the headphones out of your ears. God forbid you chill your brain from the inside with a draft.
4. Should I see a psychologist? No, of course, thank you very much for your good advice, but you shouldn’t compare everyone to yourself.
5. You will open your mouth at the dentist.
6. To shock me, you will have to say something smart.
7. One more beep from your platform and your teeth will move.
8. So that you celebrate your wedding at McDonald's.
9. If I had the pleasure of communicating with bitches, I would have had a dog long ago.
10. Mind like a shell.
11. Looking at you, I begin to understand that nothing human is alien to God. He has a great sense of humor.
12. Talk, talk... I always yawn when I'm interested!
13. You would decorate the world with your absence, before I took sin on my soul!
14. The only positive quality you have is the Rh factor.
15. I live opposite the cemetery. If you show off, you will live opposite me.
16. Is it you that everyone loves? Oh, well, yes, love is evil...
17. So that you could cover yourself with a teaspoon in the bathhouse!
18. -Girl, are you bored? -Not by that much…
19. Your right to your own opinion does not oblige me to listen to nonsense.
20. -You can’t put “thank you” in your pocket.
- you will carry it in your hands!!!
21. Hey, you little rose! The tulip is out of here, otherwise you’ll turn gray like a dahlia!
22. I came to you with greetings, with an iron and a gun
24. It is better to be silent intelligently than to speak stupidly
25. Is this a bunch of words, or do I need to think about it?
26. Sorry for not living up to your stereotypes.
27. In some heads thoughts come to die
28. Him: Shall we go to you or shall we go to me?
She: At the same time. You - to yourself, and I - to myself.
29. Has the verbal oil well dried up?
30. Madhouse on the road, psychos in nature!
31. What are you watching? Are you in a museum or something? Now I’ll arrange a cultural event for you in two acts without intermission! If I give you a slap, your head will fly off
32. What do you think, that if you yell at me louder, I will listen more quietly?
33. Now you can take your glasses home from me. In different pockets.
34. Your style of speech reminds me of the market talk of the distant nineties at the end of the last century.
35. And don't laugh! Laughing for no reason is a sign that a person is either an idiot or a pretty girl. If you want to convince me of the latter, first shave.
How to respond in specific situations. Examples!
- Agree with offensive you person. Classic:
- Yes, you are a complete fool and an idiot!
- Yes. I have a certificate too! Do you think it’s very smart to prove something to a fool?
- You're just a fool!
- Agree! This is because you constantly have to talk to fools.
– I’m not satisfied with your answers!
– What questions, such answers!
– Yes, I’m smarter than all of you combined!
- Certainly! After all, you are crazy. I wish I had a watchman for this shed...
2. Take a statement directed at you to the point of absurdity:
- Hey, slow down!
– I can’t, there must be only one brake. (It’s impossible, our pair already has one brake!)
- What are you doing?
- I'm doing it in my pants.
– Why are you scamming me now?
– And now who do you consider yourself to be, a bee or a rabbit?
3. Turn a negative statement into a positive one:
- You are a horse!
– If it weren’t for the suckers, where would you be now?
- There are only idiots around!
– Is it unusual for you to feel smart?
– What kind of phone is being grabbed when I’m talking to you?!
– I also prefer to talk to smart people!
4. Press the person “too weakly.” After all, no one likes to feel like a weakling:
– You’re dancing somehow crappy..
– I’m not dancing, I’m just moving my legs so you don’t crush me... (And you know how great I am at cross-stitching!)
-What are you babbling about?
- It’s strange, but others like my speech... Don’t you have a sense of beauty, or have hearing problems?
– Are you pretending to be smart?
– Do you have problems communicating with smart people?
5. What do you want?
- Well, why are you quiet?
– Did you already want to get to the surgeon’s table by this time?
- Well, who is brave here?
“You talk to me like that, as if your subscription to the emergency room is disappearing.”
– You are a simple housewife!
– Would you like me to be a currency prostitute?
We need to fight rudeness! If, when you are rude, you want to cry, then the interlocutor has achieved his goal. I have asserted myself at your expense and been strengthened by a considerable share of your energy! Do not encourage this behavior under any circumstances!
When faced with rudeness, you always want to respond to the offender. In a fit of anger, we often do not control our feelings and emotions. This can cause a number of negative consequences. The simplest outcome of them is a quarrel, and the most negative is a fight. But, you must admit, to suffer yourself and humiliate yourself to assault just because your interlocutor is in a bad mood is, at the very least, stupid.
The most correct thing in such a situation is to answer the offender calmly and confidently, but in such a way as to put the boor in his place. To do this tactfully, without spending extra effort and energy, there are special preparations - daring phrases.
Who is this boor?
This is an aggressor who attacks and violates your personal boundaries. He tries to hurt the most painful places and at the same time avoid revenge. Scientific information indicates that such a person is, in fact, a pitiful person with low self-esteem who wants to assert himself at the expense of those who have been offended or ridiculed by him. Here's what you need to know when faced with a boor. Understand and forgive, or even take pity on an insignificant person, or respond with a witty phrase, smiling good-naturedly (not sarcasticly!).
Examples of situations when anger cannot be contained
A decent-looking person who is a boor can be found today at every step. Often the most common places where it is located are the following:
1. Trading platforms. The favorite place of a bored, angry person is, of course, a market or a supermarket. In some cases, a pharmacy is popular. Firstly, you can go there as an excursion and be outraged to your heart's content, studying the prices on the shelves. Secondly, hanging out in the crowd is also a nice thing for them. And all this, of course, is accompanied by unpleasant comments addressed to passers-by. By the way, store sellers also like to be rude.
2. Public transport. The favorite place of all boors is the crowd. And where else can you enjoy disturbances as much as in the crush of traffic during rush hour? There you pushed, here - you. And as a result, for example, we have a heatedly screaming woman who throws out her anger at everyone who tries to argue with her. And God forbid you surpass her in this honed skill.
3. Clinic. A government agency, where you always have to wait in line, also knows daring people. This could be an impudent person who will try to skip the line. But then he will receive a good verbal thrashing from the people waiting in line, among whom boors may also be hiding.
4. Places of study. Adolescence is famous for the “painful” growing up of children. How is it shown? Impudent phrases addressed to teachers, bickering in lessons at school, lyceums. Teenagers cannot give an objective assessment of what is happening. It seems to them that they already know everything, and adults are a little behind them. Unfortunately, rudeness and impudent phrases in the lessons of high school students are quite commonplace. The teacher can put the student in his place, gaining authority in his eyes, or not pay attention to what he “outgrows” by itself.
Daring phrases and expressions: examples
- And it’s true that we are all interested in speculating on topics that don’t concern us at all.
- You shouldn't expect any good from a person who is difficult to cheer up.
- I know that crooks achieve success, but not because of their own intelligence, as they believe, but because of the gullible people around them. And to lie, you don’t need intelligence. Working honestly is a skill.
- I’m terribly embarrassed to tell you this, but I’m not at all interested in how I look in your eyes, forgive me. I look great in mine, and that's enough.
- What is the level of development, so are the interests.
- You are so low in communication that, frankly, you are not even visible on the horizon.
- Please continue. When you say things like that, I feel so smart.
- Sorry, but you smell a bad odor coming from your mouth.
- Maybe I can bring you another drum?
- With such tirades you can only stand in the corner.
- If you are angry, then you yourself know that you are wrong.
- In this case, your emotions are not identified with the conclusions of your thinking.
- If you don't like me, I allow you to go underground.
Sassy phrases for girls
If a girl does not want to communicate with a guy, but cannot get rid of his pestering, or vice versa, she is struggling with his rudeness, perhaps she should use some phrases.
For example:
- Your time in my life is over. Hand in your pass and head out.
- If you fell in love with me, it's your mistake, all you can achieve is my smile.
- Dear, you are right - there have never been people like you, there are no more and there is no need.
- What I should do, I know, it’s written in the Constitution. The rest is up to me as I want.
- I'm doing great, so I have nothing to please you with.
- Aren't you the one who starred in the movie "Clowns"?
- I'm not picky, just the best is enough for me.
What about the guys?
Not only girls suffer from annoying boors. Let's look at some sassy phrases for guys. They can use these statements in response to the rudeness of their peers:
- You're not beautiful enough to be rude to me.
- If you say that, then most likely you have a spare jaw in your pocket.
- Kiss me on the run, I'm standing behind a tree.
- You may be the most beautiful girl in our area, but I’m also interested in communicating with smart people.
So, the first foundation has been laid. Now you know how to respond to rudeness. But under no circumstances should you parry these statements in front of an innocent person. Otherwise you will find yourself in the role of a boor.
Any person has encountered manifestations of rudeness and rudeness of other people at least once in his life. Swearing can really ruin your mood. It is important to remember that any similar situation with rudeness can be played out in such a way as to remain in the black: you should learn how to be rude correctly. There are certain tips and techniques, united under the common slogan “learning to be rude beautifully.”
People who are rude to another person have low self-esteem and an unstable psychological state, which causes a decrease in proper energy. Communication helps to replenish its level, and the conversation should be emotional, “accusatory”.
Many people notice that rude people are capable of being rude to certain people. For a rude person, it is important that the victim cannot fight back. Usually rudeness is addressed to those people who:
- non-conflict nature;
- heightened sense of guilt;
- lack of confidence;
- psychological compliance, weakness.
Aggressive people feel such qualities subconsciously, so they choose the recipient of insults from this category. Non-conflict people need to understand how to learn to be rude in order to protect themselves from unjustified rudeness.
The response to rudeness should be beautiful so that the offender cannot come up with an answer to it instantly. This makes him feel stupid and stop attacking, and the defending person does not descend to rudeness, which automatically puts him morally one step higher.
He will show himself to be witty, erudite, cultured, self-confident - this is the basis of how to be rude beautifully and emerge victorious from any verbal skirmish.
How to respond to rudeness
There are several techniques for communicating with rude people in order to be rude beautifully. These methods can silence a boor, feeling the inconsistency of his judgments:
- Politeness - you need to calmly communicate with the person swearing, showing maximum politeness and loyalty - offenders do not expect patience in response to shouting, which knocks them out of the initial direction.
- Boringness is triggered when communicating online, where rudeness constantly happens. This is how the administration works - the moderators calmly describe each of the participant’s violations, and do not argue (“you have five grammatical errors in this message and three punctuation errors in the previous one - before writing, learn to write correctly”).
- Shock can unsettle the offender for a long time. Sharp phrases are used that are not directly related to the topic of the dialogue, but cause the desired reaction. It is better to prepare a few caustic universal remarks in advance. Similar phrases work well (these examples of rudeness are common in the “learning to be rude beautifully” methods):
“What do you think about humanity as a member of another species?”;
“Probably the only thing positive about you is the Rh factor”;
“Speak, speak. I always yawn when I'm interested."
- An agreement with a boor helps to quickly end the conflict. The boor expects a quarrel and altercation after the curse he has expressed, and if the person agrees with the statement and does not continue the conversation, the offender will get confused and stop the attacks. In such cases, in order to be rude beautifully, they say: “Yes, yes, I completely agree with you. Yes, I have terrible style!
- Reducing the significance of an event almost always helps. It is important not to view the offender as sharp and evil, exceeding his real qualities and putting him above himself. It is better to present his rudeness as something harmless and small, which should be treated condescendingly: “don’t be upset - many people don’t shine with talents.”
- Ignoring is a universal way of responding to rudeness. It is worth remaining silent if the boor poses a real danger to health. Silence can be beautiful if the boorish attitude is clearly incompetent and stupid. There are subtleties here - the person defending himself should not look angrily at the offender after this: this creates the appearance that the rudeness has hurt.
How best to respond to rudeness
There is a significant difference between the rudeness of well-known people and random strangers - the answers must be adequate. General recommendations for the person answering:
- remain completely calm and friendly;
- be lenient and gentle;
- respond with a sense of humor, but without anger.
How to respond to the rudeness of strangers and distant people
When communicating with strangers, it is important to remain polite, since it is sometimes inappropriate to be rude to them, but of course everything depends on the circumstances.
If rudeness manifests itself in communication with employees of government, medical and social departments, it is better not to make cutting remarks and ironic phrases. This can have consequences for the person to whom the rudeness was expressed. It’s better to write a letter of complaint addressed to a superior person, organization, or simply threaten the boor: “if you don’t stop insulting me, I will write a complaint about your work.”
There is no point in overtly insulting employers or people on whom anything meaningful to the humiliated person may depend. In these cases, you need to maintain your own opinion, gently but convincingly proving it using weighty arguments. Rudeness is inappropriate here: calmness and confidence in your opinion will look much more beautiful.
If people working in the service sector are rude, you can make an ironic remark to them, pointing out in response that they are behaving incorrectly. It is important here not to succumb to provocation. Good phrases:
- “You talk, you talk. Maybe you’ll finally say something smart!”;
- “Isn’t the zoo closed for the night?”;
- “You try to compensate for the deficit of the mind with noise, don’t you?”;
- “Alas, I don’t have time to humor your complexes.”
How to respond to rudeness from friends and relatives
When quarreling with relatives and friends, the best thing is to try to talk calmly and resolve the conflict without irony or mutual accusation.
Rudeness addressed to loved ones sounds ugly. But his statement is sometimes impossible to avoid: some people may uncontrollably try to humiliate a loved one by showing superiority, or say rude things out of jealousy.
The best defense will be an attack. It is necessary to respond without anger, but with humor to the rudeness of a loved one - “definitely, your intellect can outshine the light of a lamp.”
With friends, it is acceptable to use more sarcastic and humorous phrases. They will help to reflect the barb of the boor and at the same time evoke recognition and respect from those who heard the conversation. Do not pretend that you are offended by any of your opponent’s phrases, do not react too emotionally. Speak as if in jest, but at the same time make it clear to the person that you are not going to tolerate conversations in such a tone. The examples “teeth are not hair, they will fall out and will not grow back”, “my sunshine! Remember once and before sclerosis!
This is the peculiarity of how to learn to be beautifully rude to close friends, but at the same time not quarrel with them for the rest of your life.
In quarrels involving representatives of the opposite sex, it is always difficult to respond to rudeness, since there is a belief that boys should not be rude to women, and girls should not respond to men’s rudeness. The need for a caustic response from a girl may arise when a young man offers his company too persistently or is openly rude. We're rude to the guys:
- “Wasn’t it you who starred in the movie “Clowns”?”;
- “Darling, you’re right – I’ve never had anyone like you, I don’t have any more and I don’t need any more”;
- Why do you think that I want to make an idiot out of you? It is not necessary. Everything has been done a long time ago!”
But it is important to understand that if in front of you is an inadequate person who poses a threat, then it is better to remain silent and pass by. You also need to be able to distinguish between a simple attempt to get acquainted and rudeness, otherwise you will look like a rude person.
The ability to be rude beautifully is the art of mastery of words, combined with a sense of humor and tact. In order to emerge victorious from a situation where the offender is rude, you need to feel what is appropriate to say and what is not. Rudeness is both an attempt to offend another person and a powerful weapon that, when used skillfully, helps defend against unfounded attacks from other people.