Quiz why are you single female version. Test: Are you prone to loneliness?

68 children aged from 12 to 18 years took part in this experiment. They voluntarily agreed to participate and spend 8 hours alone. At the same time, the children were forbidden to use all kinds of communication means: TV, computer, mobile phone and others. At the same time, they had full access to a number of other entertainments: they could read, play musical instruments, write, do handicrafts, go for walks, play games, and the like.

The leader of the experiment was a family psychologist. Her goal was to prove her own working hypothesis. It was that modern children, although they devote too much time to entertainment, are completely unable to occupy themselves on their own, and also know nothing about their own inner world.

According to the rules of this experiment, the children had to come to the next experiment and carefully talk about how these 8 hours passed. During the experiment, children had to carefully record all their own actions, as well as feelings and their own thoughts. The children were told that if anyone experienced excessive anxiety or severe tension, as well as unpleasant discomfort, the participants were to immediately interrupt the test, note the time it stopped and describe the reason.

Many will ask: what's wrong with that? At first glance, a study on loneliness may seem quite harmless. The psychology specialist also thought incorrectly. She thought that this experiment was absolutely safe. The results of the experiment were so unexpected and shocking that no one could even imagine. Of all 68 schoolchildren, only three were able to complete the study: 2 boys and one girl.

Other participants ended the experiment for various reasons: 5 began to feel the most severe so-called “panic attacks.” Three were visited by thoughts of suicide. 27 participants experienced symptoms such as hot flashes, sweating, hair-raising sensations, nausea, sharp abdominal pain, dizziness, and so on. Almost every participant experienced feelings of anxiety and fear.

The participants’ initial interest in the experiment and anticipation of novelty disappeared after 1–2 hours. Of all the participants, only 10 began to experience some anxiety after 3 or more hours spent completely alone.

The girl, who was able to complete the study, sent the supervisor a diary in which she carefully described her own condition for the entire 8 hours. After reading it, the psychologist’s hair began to move. For ethical reasons, the diary was not subject to publication. However, it became known what the young people who participated in the experiment tried to occupy themselves with:

Many simply looked out the window or wandered aimlessly around the apartment;

Drew or attempted to draw;

Engaged in physical exercises or exercised on simulators;

They filled out a diary, entering their own thoughts, or simply wrote letters on paper;

Cooked food or ate food;

We did schoolwork, taking into account the fact that it was vacation during the experiment, the children began to do their homework out of desperation;

We tried to put together puzzles;

Spent time with pets;

We took a shower;

1 boy played the flute, many played the guitar or piano;

One girl spent her time embroidering;

Another girl was praying;

The boy walked around the city on foot TWENTY km;

Many wrote poetry;

We were cleaning the apartment;

Many went outside, going to cafes, bars or shopping centers. According to the rules of the experiment, it was impossible to contact anyone, but these participants probably decided that salespeople didn’t count;

1 guy went to an amusement park and rode for 3 hours. It ended with him starting to vomit;

1 boy decided to spend time at the zoo;

The girl went to the Museum of Political History;

The guy rode around the city on trolleybuses and buses for 5 hours;

Each participant had a desire to fall asleep at some point, but this was not successful for anyone. As they wrote, “bad” thoughts began to visit them. After the children interrupted the study, 20 immediately used their mobile phones to call their friends, 5 immediately went to visit friends, FOURTEEN of them used the Internet and visited social networks, 3 called their parents.

Other participants immediately began playing or watching TV. In addition, almost every teenager turned on music. It is worth noting that immediately after the interruption of the psychological experience, all unpleasant symptoms disappeared for all participants.

After some time, 63 former participants agreed that the study was not only interesting, but also very useful, especially for the purpose of self-knowledge. 6 decided to carry out the experiment on their own, and reported that, although not the first time, they nevertheless completed it successfully.

When the participants analyzed their own state during the experiment, it turned out that 51 of them used such combinations of words as: “withdrawal syndrome”, “it turns out that I cannot live without ...”, “dependence”, “withdrawal” and the like. Absolutely everyone admitted that they were extremely surprised by these thoughts that visited them during the experiment, but they were unable to concentrate on them, since their general condition had worsened.

Here's what the children who successfully completed the study on loneliness did:

One guy was analyzing and organizing his collections. And after that he began to replant indoor plants;

Another boy spent 8 hours building a model of a sailing ship, stopping only to eat and walk the dog.

It should be noted that not one of them experienced any negative emotions, nor did they have any thoughts.

Agree, there is something to think about...

Today I invite you to take a short test: Tendency to loneliness. It will help you understand how sociable you are or, on the contrary, prone to solitude.

Test Tendency to loneliness

Instructions: Carefully read the twelve questions presented below and choose the answer option that seems most suitable to you by placing a sign next to it. Try not to think too long, because this is not an exam! Probably every person at least once in his life wanted to be alone with himself. But there are completely different categories of people. For some, loneliness is the best vacation, since it is at this time that you can analyze important events and delve into your own soul. In some cases, such people are very shy and socially awkward, especially around strangers.

There are also people who simply need to be in company always and everywhere. Representatives of this group feel like fish out of water at noisy parties or events, even if there are strangers around them. But they endure loneliness and their own company very hard. Boredom, frustration, and sometimes depression appear.

	Statements
	I'm unhappy doing so many things alone
	I have no one to talk to
	I can't bear to be so lonely
	I miss communication
	I feel like no one understands me
	I find myself waiting for people to call, write to me
	There's no one I can turn to
	I'm not close to anyone anymore
	Those around me do not share my interests and ideas
	I feel abandoned
	I am unable to open up and communicate with those around me
	I feel completely alone
	My social relationships and connections are superficial
	I'm dying for company
	Nobody really knows me well
	I feel isolated from others
	I'm miserable being such an outcast
	I have trouble making friends
	I feel excluded and isolated by others
	People around me, but not with me

Processing, the key to the loneliness test.

The number of each answer option is counted.
The sum of the answers “often” is multiplied by 3, “sometimes” by 2, “rarely” by 1 and “never” by 0.
The results obtained are added up. The maximum possible loneliness score is 60 points.

Interpretation

a high degree of loneliness is indicated by scores from 40 to 60,

from 20 to 40 points - average level of loneliness,

from 0 to 20 points - low level of loneliness.

Feelings associated with loneliness

Factor analysis of the emotional states of a lonely person

despair	depression	unbearable boredom	self-deprecation
Despair		Impatience	Feeling of one's own unattractiveness
	Depression		worthlessness
Helplessness	Devastation	Desire for change	Feeling of one's own stupidity
Frightened	Isolation	Stiffness	Shyness
Losing hope	Self pity	Irritability	Insecurity
Abandonment	Melancholy	Inability to pull yourself together	Alienation
Vulnerability	Longing for a specific person

Factor analysis of the causes of loneliness

freedom from attachments	alienation	privacy	forced isolation	change of place
Absence of spouse	I feel like a black sheep	“I come home to an empty house”	Home attachment	Staying away from home
Lack of partner	Misunderstanding from others	"Abandoned by everyone"	Bedridden	New place of work or study
Severance of relationship with spouse, with your loved one	worthlessness		Lack of funds	Moving or moving too frequently
	Lack of close friends			Frequent travel

Factor analysis of reactions to loneliness

sad passivity	active solitude	burning money	social contact
	I study or work	Spending money	I'm calling a friend
		Shopping	I'm going to visit someone
I sit and think	I listen to music
I don't do anything	I'm doing exercises
I overeat
I take tranquilizers	Doing what I love
Watching TV	I go to the cinema
I drink or I pass out	I'm reading I play music

People have been trying to avoid or get used to loneliness for centuries. The one who disagreed cursed loneliness, the one who resigned himself did not notice, the wise one enjoyed it. Loneliness existed, and that means it is necessary.

Early psychological studies of loneliness focused on the individual's self-perception of the condition. Rogers viewed loneliness as the alienation of the individual from his true inner feelings. He believed that, striving for recognition and love, people often show themselves from the outside and therefore become alienated from themselves. Whitehorn echoed this view: “Some significant discrepancy between the sense of self and the reaction to the self of others gives rise to and aggravates the feeling of loneliness; this process can become a vicious cycle of loneliness and alienation.”

Thus, Rogers and Whitehorn believe that loneliness is caused by the individual's perception of dissonance between the true self and how others see the self.

Few studies have tested this idea. Eddy hypothesized that loneliness is associated with a discrepancy between three aspects of self-perception: the individual's self-perception (actual self), the individual's ideal self, and the individual's idea of ​​how others see her (reflected self).

Often, low self-esteem is a set of opinions and behaviors that interfere with the establishment or maintenance of satisfactory social relationships. People with low self-esteem interpret social interactions in a self-deprecating way. They are more likely to attribute failures in communication to internal, self-blaming factors. People who don't rate themselves highly expect that others also consider them worthless. Such people react more sharply to calls for communication and refusal to communicate. Overall, low self-esteem is often embodied in an interrelated set of self-deprecating cognitions and behaviors that distort social competence, putting people at risk of loneliness.

You can feel lonely alone, in a crowd of people, and even next to your loved one. The solution to the problem of loneliness is that it is necessary to determine what kind of communication and with whom is missing, what information and what impressions are missing, and it is this deficiency that needs to be filled.

How lonely are you?.. Loneliness test. Method of subjective feeling of loneliness by D. Russell and M. Ferguson.