To achieve a goal, having a great desire or a cherished dream is not enough. You also need to take the right actions in the required direction. Have situations ever happened to you when you gave up, didn’t finish any work to the end, or simply lost faith in yourself? If yes, it means that you did not have enough determination to achieve success in this or that business.

Purposefulness refers to a person’s desire for a specific result. This means that you need to move towards it step by step, without stopping or losing your way, even if you encounter obstacles. Experienced psychologists give recommendations on how to develop and strengthen determination so that actions towards achieving goals always have a positive result.

Certainty

When achieving something, a person must be clearly aware of what he wants to get as a result of his actions. Setting a goal is 50% of success. It is also important to imagine what steps the road to successful implementation of plans will consist of. You need to know what actions to take to make them as effective as possible.

Separation

If you dream of achieving something global, for example, earning a million or purchasing a luxurious country cottage, it is recommended to break this “big” goal into several small goals. It is also worth determining the sequence of achieving small goals. Experts say that it is easier to believe in the success of your project if you have not one global dream, but several less significant desires - its components.

Action plan

Before you start implementing your idea, develop a clear plan. It is best to record your further actions on paper, breaking them down point by point. This is a prerequisite without which success cannot be achieved. The ideal option is to draw up not only a general, but also a daily plan of events.

Tracking results

Pleasure from the process

When moving towards a goal, it is important to gain satisfaction from the process itself. The presence of such emotions. Even if your body is affected by fatigue after a day of work, you should still enjoy assessing and analyzing situations related to achieving your goal. If everything happens the other way around, most likely the target was chosen incorrectly.

Eliminating Fears

All fears that interfere with this process should be removed. For example, the most common fears when implementing ideas are such fears as unsuccessful completion of the project, lack of self-confidence, and fear of collapse. Any fears that live in the subconscious can completely block creative energy, which means that moving forward will be very problematic and almost meaningless.

Support

Everyone has moments of despair when they want to give up everything and run away from the problems that have piled up. Under the weight of failures, a large number of even the most brilliant and promising projects broke down. And what can we say about those who try by any means to achieve what they want! There are often obstacles in the way of such people. But they do not fall into despair and do not allow panic to take over their consciousness. That is why you should find an “outlet” that will be able to save you from despair in moments of weakness and apathy.

In conclusion, one more small piece of advice. When achieving your goal, it is useful to periodically read the autobiographical works of successful people, where they tell how they achieved the desired results. You will be able to follow their path to their dream from beginning to end, understanding what helped famous and successful individuals reach the pinnacle of success.

Determination is a personal trait that is characterized by a conscious, consistent, long-term, stable focus on a conditioned result, called a goal. Purposefulness in psychology is a person’s ability to formulate a task with certain characteristics, plan activities, perform actions according to the needs of the goal, overcoming resistance, internal and external. A purposeful person is someone who has developed a sense of purpose; accordingly, he is able to consciously plan activities and consistently carry them out until the goal is achieved.

What is determination?

Determination is a positive, individually and socially rewarded quality. It is listed in vacancies, wished for birthday people, and considered a valuable compliment. Despite the fact that this characteristic can be acquired, there are a fairly small number of people who can readily define themselves as a purposeful person and even fewer can back up the statement with real behavior.

Purposefulness is an integrative concept in psychology. The main spheres of psychological essence in it are will, but this also applies to character. We are not talking about limitations, but about ways to develop this quality and the scale of its influence on the individual. There are no objective restrictions in the development of determination; there are no “innately unmotivated” people, just as there are no those who received this quality as a genetic lottery.

A person’s determination is not an innate trait, therefore the lack of examples in generations does not matter, and there is no age, gender or cultural limiter in its development. This is an acquired trait that is developed through consistent actions. Denial of this trait in oneself is a betrayal of one’s essence, since there are no objective arguments in favor of the impossibility of developing this quality in a reasonable person. Everyone has experience of purposefulness and the naturalness of its manifestation. When a child learns to speak by forming a new word and then persistently repeating it, he is an example of determination. The formation of speech is a very complex process that requires the expenditure of large resources; the skill of correct speech requires a lot of effort; it is not so automatic that it develops on its own, as evidenced by physically healthy children with speech problems due to lack of training.

Personal determination is a skill that absolutely anyone can possess, and by refusing the right to develop it, he deprives himself of the source of realizing his dreams. Even with great innate talent, its realization requires going through a stage of persistent effort.

The definition of determination is associated with perseverance, perseverance, motivation, clarity of perception, and willpower.

Purpose and determination

Purposefulness is a quality that is prescribed based on the results of its implementation, and not allowed. You cannot be potentially, conditionally, passively purposeful. Only by achieving the set goals can an individual attribute this characteristic to himself. Similarly, if a person has achieved a certain goal, was purposeful for a certain period, then stopped the necessary actions, choosing passive behavior, purposefulness will weaken and after some time will not be a trait that can be declared. Without external manifestation, determination does not function.

Purposefulness is one of the key concepts in psychology concerning the emotional-volitional sphere. Examples of determination are also stories of realizing one’s nature. Determination is a psychological tool that is universal because it can be applied to any trait, dream, goal or desire. By developing determination, a person gains more and more strength and ability to influence ever larger and deeper layers of his life.

Purpose and determination are inseparable. If the goal is unattractive and does not inspire even at the stage of dreams, then it will be possible to ignite from it and direct strength only through a strong willpower, and then not for long. If the goal is extremely necessary, but does not have a response in the soul, you should consciously bring an emotional background into it. After all, if you need it so much, it means that there is something behind it that you dream about. Those. you can include it in the structure of a larger, attractive goal by making it a sub-item. The pleasure of achieving a large-scale goal is always slightly delayed; keeping this in mind, you can feel the meaning of the word “anticipation.”

In English, one of the spellings of the word purposefulness is the phrase “sense of purpose,” literally “the meaning of purpose.” And this is where you should start for yourself - why and for what purpose to spend a resource to achieve a goal. For example, you may be too lazy to do minimal exercise or go to the gym just “for your health,” but imagining your athletic body on the beach, in beautiful clothes at a celebration, or running a marathon will spur you on. Accordingly, the first step is to imagine the final goal, at least approximately. Over time, it may change and fade into the background, but now it should have an incentive meaning.

How to overcome laziness and develop determination?

Often called an obstacle to developing a sense of purpose. This is a conditional enemy within us, which we would like to overcome and become collected and purposeful.

Laziness can arise for a number of reasons, which can relate both to physical illness and internal contradictions with the goal. To understand yourself, you need to analyze the goal, its scale, scope, resource costs, including time.

Viktor Frankl, the creator of the psychotherapeutic direction “,” said that for better motivation, the goal should be a little more than achievable, being a little “beyond the horizon,” always a little unattainable dream. Then there will be a good stable level of motivation and prevention of “disappointment in achievement.” The man who went through the horrors of a concentration camp, driven by his goals, knew what he was talking about.

And develop a sense of purpose? Sometimes laziness masks not living up to your own expectations, when it seems that the goal bar is too high, but you honestly don’t want to admit it to yourself. To do this, the global goal should be divided into subgoals and the one that does not cause such stress should be taken as a guideline. Let the global one remain a dream, which allows for some unattainability at the moment. As you progress, the plan will be revised, and the steps and achievements already taken will strengthen confidence in the possibility of realizing your dream. Or it will become a sub-goal to a larger one.

Lack of motivation is often cited as a barrier, or rather, its decline during implementation or even at the planning stage. Motivation is part of the emotional sphere, the “fuel” of will. If you postpone implementation for a long time, engaging in long-term planning, emotional energy is spent, but there is no reinforcement with the result, motivation decreases. At the implementation stage, motivation decreases due to increased stress from the workload.

To level out this decline, you need to remind yourself of the results, as well as plan intermediate stages with a specific, desired result, so that the pleasure from what you receive reinforces your motivation. The best option is when such an exchange occurs constantly; for this, to achieve the goal, certain steps should be taken daily. Therefore, at the initial stage of the formation of this quality, it is worth starting with the formation of some kind of habit, when actions should be daily and every day there is positive reinforcement in the form of a “tick” for the action performed and the pleasure of self-overcoming. Moreover, it is more effective to create a new, useful one, rather than fight the old one, i.e. do not deprive yourself of anything that can increase stress, but add something necessary. Gradually, you need to make your tasks more difficult, since performing an overly easy task for a long time reduces pleasure, since it is no longer assessed as an achievement. A certain satisfaction will remain in the background, but to constantly maintain a tangible level, you need to step to the next level.

How to become a purposeful person?

Purpose and determination are concepts of the emotional-volitional sphere. It is no coincidence that emotions and will are considered together. In a sense, we can rephrase that a goal is an object of emotion. Imagining it, thinking about achievement and results, a person feeds himself with delayed emotions of pleasure and joy.

Purposefulness is the result of volitional efforts, coordinated and consistent behavior. Volitional effort is behavior in which a person acts under self-pressure, and emotions help him withstand this pressure, keeping in mind the result.

And to become a purposeful person, you need to integrate these concepts. Choose a goal that is desirable, inspires and performs consistent volitional actions. At the initial stages, the goal must be chosen, in which there is practically no doubt about achieving it and the actions necessary for implementation are perceived as insignificant. But the pleasure from implementation should be quite subjectively significant. The goal should be environmentally friendly, positive, and when planning, take into account personal resources as much as possible, and not be focused on others, i.e. as autonomous as possible for the individual.

Having completed this step, the goal bar will be raised, and the required actions will accordingly become more difficult. The factor of obtaining perceived satisfaction from the actions performed at a low level of development of the trait of purposefulness is of great importance; subsequently it will be more automatic, remaining an active link in the interaction. Completing the previous task will give you confidence in your strength to complete the next one, the skill will be strengthened in your own eyes, as well as in the eyes of others, the image of a purposeful person will be formed. A person may think that achievements are for others or at some stages become discouraged.

Examples of determination in other people can inspire your own activity. Studying biographies and success stories, admiring the perseverance and dedication of heroes, increases confidence in people's capabilities. And looking at them, we think about how to develop determination in ourselves.

How to develop determination?

Like any trait, determination is the habit of acting in accordance with the intended goal; it is a neural connection in the brain like a “beaten path”. With each subsequent “pass”, performing the required action, this happens with increasing ease, less and less conscious volitional effort is required. A person with good development of this skill no longer thinks about whether he can stick to the planned plan, since past experience reinforces confidence in his abilities.

From the outside, one gets the impression that as soon as he wants, he easily achieves results, determination is in his blood, but in reality this is the result of a well-practiced skill, just as it is not difficult for an athlete to run several kilometers, but for an untrained one, one kilometer seems insurmountable. Also, the pleasure that a person trained in purposefulness receives from the process is better and of higher quality, and his emotional-volitional integration works smoothly and as independently as possible from external circumstances, independently regulating and compensating the level of stress from volitional efforts.

When wondering how to develop sense of purpose, it is important to remember that human psychology is systemic and by following rules that seem unrelated to will, you can indirectly influence the development of sense of purpose.

Analyze what situations and words disturb everyday peace. The more hectic and distracted a person is, the fewer resources there will be for the right areas. We must remember that the emphasis is not on who is distracting, but why we ourselves are distracted. It is highly advisable to engage in any physical exercise, even if sports and appearance are not areas of interest. This helps to indirectly train will, patience, consistency on a daily basis, and also reduces excessive emotional lability. This will strengthen self-confidence, since it will constantly remind you of your ability to overcome reluctance and laziness. Exercise can be considered the very first step in developing a sense of purpose for any person.

Consider the reasons why necessary steps are delayed and remind yourself that this is your desire. Perhaps the goal is not so interesting, does not have a response. But if this is not the case, then the obstacles are solvable. Here it is important not to get hung up on the brain bubble of soul-searching, but to develop a conditioned reflex in yourself. If there is no doubt about the need for an action, first do it, and then think about why you didn’t want to, if it makes sense.

The best incentive for action should be pleasure from the process of achieving the goal. At the initial stages, you can formulate an abstract prize for perseverance, but upon receiving it, associate it with the action performed, forming a connection between the necessary action and pleasure. Positive reinforcement in habit formation works more effectively than negative reinforcement when there is punishment for non-compliance. A maximum of positive associations must be associated with the necessary activity; negative ones arise from unusual efforts, and an additional increase in them by stress from punishment can completely deprive one of motivation for the goal.

If your goals seem large-scale and your strengths seem small, you should start with small goals or subgoals. Let endurance be the goal, determination as the goal. This may seem like a petty and stupid task, but achieving the most global goal requires a sequence of small but systematic steps. There is also a “plateau” phenomenon, when some time the efforts do not bring results or the results are small. Most often, during this period, emotional inspiration is already reduced or depleted, and only the habit of daily work does not allow you to stop. What is also important here is the desire for the goal, reminding yourself why it all started, what pleasures it promises and what joy it brings. The larger the goal, the more complex the process in structure, but the principle is the same as when forming any everyday habit, which also requires determination.

When they entered our apartment, I heard a conversation: greetings were being exchanged. Through the glass door, our visitors had a clear view of the living room, seeing me stretched out on the sofa with my eyes closed. One of the guests said to my wife Robin: “Isn’t it nice to see Peter resting? I’ve never seen him in such a state before.”

My wife replied: “Believe it or not, he is not resting. Now he is probably working hard on something, he is active all the time.”

Later our guests asked: “Is it possible to be active all the time?” I answered loudly: “Yes!!”

When I traveled around the world and spoke with groups of people of different nationalities, I was often asked questions: “Where do I get my vitality?”, “How do I manage to inspire others?”, “How do I manage to constantly to be active?". It is true that determination and inspiration, or the lack thereof, strike each of us at times. As a rule, goal-orientation arises under the influence of external factors. For example, we may be driven by threat, fear, crisis, conflict, or love, hate, or anger. However, just as these factors can motivate us, they can also destroy us if they are uncontrolled and not managed through discipline and planning.

Is it possible to practically control motivation? I believe it is possible. Moreover, I believe that managing your motivation can become part of your daily activities and your personal quality.

Dr. John Edmund Haggay, to whom I dedicate this book, is for me an example of the most purposeful and active person of our time. Constantly in motion, he carefully and swiftly soars through life with the grace of a ballerina, in minimal fuss with maximum efficiency. His manners are always pleasant, his purpose is always clear, and his reactions, even in the most extraordinary situations, are always quick and accurate. Someone once said about John Haggay that after fifteen minutes spent with him, you feel like you can conquer the whole world.

Is this just self-hypnosis or selfish narcissism? Or maybe this is just arrogant talkativeness and boasting? No, I believe it is something much more. It is a lifestyle that exudes confidence and the ability to achieve your goal, whatever it may be, and inspires everyone around you in the creative and goal-oriented processes.

W. Clement Stone, the famous insurance tycoon, exudes this quality at 85 years of age. His life is a typical example of the rise from humble beginnings to the position to which he has attained. Millions of people are inspired by his example.

I hope that this book will give you a formula that will help you be purposeful and active all the time and propel you towards success that you thought was impossible to dream of. Re-read this book from time to time and as you go, emphasize and highlight for yourself those principles that speak to you in a special way. Let them become part of your personal qualities, acquire the force of habit and, through repetition, become deeply ingrained in your character.

At the end of life, each of us will look back in thought - at the time spent on this earth - in an attempt to understand and appreciate what we have lived. Most of us will have some regrets, and perhaps we will see areas in which we could have achieved more. But let's try. Let's try to find the strength and real motivation in order to achieve success. Try to “shoot the mark” by enjoying every moment of the life God has given you, accepting all the pros and cons that fate brings to you, and demonstrating to others “How to always be purposeful.”

Peter Daniels

Chapter 1

True motivation starts deep in the heart

Many people think that determination is an innate quality. Some people inherit it and others don't.

Just as it is true that some people are more outgoing, outgoing, and energetic than others, it is also true that determination, like other behavioral skills, can be learned.

I personally am an example of this. Basically, I'm an introvert. I would rather spend time alone or in a small circle than to share communication with masses of people or “lead a parade.” But to my disappointment, as I dug deep into the problems that needed solving and the opportunities that I couldn't afford to miss, I clearly realized that I would have to be proactive if I wanted to get some work done, constantly moving towards my goal.

Determination cannot be “caught” like a cold. Of course, you can be charged with enthusiasm by being in the company of a very inspired, purposeful and active person, but it will quickly “dissipate” if the essence of things is not clearly understood by you personally. Other people cannot think and act for you. Your personal motivation must come from deep within you. The first principle on the path to achieving goal-orientation, as in the process of changing any behavioral skills, is to: want to change and have a good reason for it.

Most people who talk to me during workshops or in person are desperate to be purposeful, but they don't have enough reasons to want change. Some people think that all they have to do is change some principles of behavior, and then everything will fall into place. But the point is completely different. When crises come and great troubles come, a real serious test begins in your life. It is in times like these that you reconsider everything you stand for and believe in. Everything once goes through real testing and refining. Only under great pressure can the deep motives of your heart be tested. At the moment of a real crisis, templates suddenly stop working, self-esteem evaporates somewhere, and memorized formulas are forgotten. This is why any life principles you stand on must be tested by fire in order to prove their worth.

Determination in its earliest stages is an act of discipline, and later you will understand that it should become your main quality. In fact, determination determines your lifestyle because it directly affects both your work and your leisure time. This is what will determine your direction in business and even politics. A purposeful person always finishes what he starts. His value system is the worthy challenge that motivates a person to achieve his goal. But this does not mean “at any cost” or “at any cost.” Quality and quantity increase interconnectedly.

Your new lifestyle, full of vitality, inspiration and determination, will act like a magnet on other people, attracting them as they want to be part of what you strive for. However, when inspiring others, take care that it does not drain your own energy and time and does not lead you to abandon your goals and principles.

First of all, you need to believe that you can change. The principles by which you live and which you firmly adhere to will not only give direction to your life, but they will also begin to change it.

One of my friends, being extremely shy, in an effort to change, consciously put himself in a situation through which his life was transformed forever. Allan was a boy from the countryside who, when he arrived on the university campus, found himself surrounded by bright and sociable young people. He constantly felt second-rate and lived in anticipation that one day everything would change on its own. But, of course, nothing happened.

As he reflected on his situation, he realized that he needed to change. He decided to become popular and active, but first he needed to develop a plan on how to achieve this. That's what he did.

First, Allan printed out something like business cards with his name, room number and other details. After that, he began to meet every car or bus bringing new students to college and help them with their things, showing them where everything was. He invited students to contact him if they needed any help in the future. Then he gave everyone their card.

The results were fantastic. Allan not only motivated himself to take action, but through a carefully developed plan he attracted the attention of literally hundreds of other students and subsequently became an indispensable assistant FOR THEM.

Why don't you decide today, right now, to learn and persevere in the principles and advice in this book? Rise to a high standard of living and achievement by becoming deeply motivated and active. Realize that motivation originates deep within you and true determination can only be achieved when it becomes part of your being. Notice those areas of your life that are full of negativism, criticism and suspicion, and let them be replaced with positive thoughts and actions, as well as praise and trust in others.

I was interested to discover that the Bible is simply full of optimism and wonderful promises. It was through this that my first love for personal purpose was born. As I continued to read, I was amazed at how, page after page, the expanses of real motivation were revealed to me. Jesus was a perfect example of this as He resolutely entered Jerusalem, steadfast in His mission to free mankind from the bondage of sin and open the way to the mystery of eternal life.

You can become an optimistic, positive, vital, purposeful and active person if you want to.

You can't impose it from the outside, it must be constantly produced inside. You will see changes immediately and very soon you will hear feedback that you have truly changed.

Commit to following the principles contained in subsequent chapters and watch as you begin to progress. This will help you gain confidence that you are not slipping back into old ways, but are actually moving forward with each new day. When analyzing your fruits, simply imagine what you would be like without them: dependent on others, apathetic, fatalistic, lazy, full of negativism, unimaginative, a failure, sad and disappointed. You must change all this to the exact opposite. After some time, you will find that you become a successful person, confident, energetic, enthusiastic, optimistic, positive, creative, determined and goal-oriented.

Principles

You can only progress with deep personal motivation.

Your motivation determines your lifestyle.

Your enthusiasm creates new relationships with others.

Your determination is your disciplined nature.

Your motivation is your best self.

Chapter 2

Set clear boundaries

I want to make it clear that I am not advocating limiting choice. But I advise you to make the right choices. Start by clearly defining your priority areas.

It is absolutely obvious that due to limitations in time, finances and energy, one person is not able to do everything necessary in this world. But don't let this limit your personal development.

So, you can't do everything, but you can do some! So why not make carefully considered choices within your capabilities and stick with them forever, or at least as long as you happen to be in certain Conditions?

You can't be goal-oriented if you want to do everything, be everywhere, and be aware of everything. Your forces must be distributed and directed in an orderly manner. The concentration of your thought processes and your ingenuity must also be carefully directed and follow your main goals. For example, I would passionately like to play music, but I cannot afford it because it would distract my thoughts, occupy my imagination, and take time and energy away from things that require my full attention.

Be selective and measure the degree of your employment with your capabilities, resources of time, finance, energy and imagination.

There is some truth in the saying that for anything to actually get done, entrust it to an active person. You can take on many tasks that seem very rewarding and rewarding and even bring you satisfaction and results. But the criterion for choice should be whether it coincides with what you have decided to devote your life to. Only then will you have sufficient motivation to do it.

I am constantly pursued by people and organizations who want to involve me in various wonderful and not so wonderful projects. But because I have goals in life (see next chapter) and I have defined the boundaries of my PERSONAL choices, I can easily and quickly assess whether what I am asked to do really coincides with what I have decided to devote my life to, and whether I have enough motivation to do it.

Why don't you make a list of those areas where you definitely don't intend to invest your life politically, socially, financially, morally, geographically or physically? Keep an orderly record and carefully date new entries as you discover more of these areas.

Several years ago, I compiled a list of people whom I had helped for twenty-five years and who had not responded to my help with gratitude or I had not seen evidence that it had helped them personally or anyone else. I thought about this list and one day I cut over seventy people from my life forever. I thought it was simply stupid to spend part of my life encouraging, uplifting, and financially supporting people who would never respond to your help. By continuing to help them, I will not be able to help those who truly strive to change and grow.

Now I have written criteria by which I choose where to invest my strength or help, and an established time frame within which I expect to receive results. I no longer waste my motivation on things that fall outside of these criteria and boundaries. I experienced a huge relief when I “crossed out” those seventy people from my life. This freed up new opportunities, time, resources and new enthusiasm for me to move towards my goals.

Once you've made a list of your priorities, where you're going to invest your life, beware of "subversion." It happens that during a social meeting or during a hurried phone call, you suddenly discover that you have planned something or agreed to some event that is not in your area of ​​​​priorities. You may not recognize this right away. But commitment to others also requires you to have driving motivational power, and it will have to come from somewhere. This way you “deprive” other areas that require your attention and reduce your productivity. If this happens, be very careful not to be caught in pseudo-rationalism, when you begin to subconsciously rationalize a task or obligation that goes beyond the boundaries you have set and undertaken, moving it into the area of ​​your priorities. Your subconscious mind will constantly deceive you if you do not seek truth, order and dedication within your clearly defined boundaries.

It is necessary to be careful and constantly examine the obligations and deeds undertaken in order to avoid intrusions into the area of ​​​​our priorities. In order to constantly have strength, drive and inspiration, it is necessary to regularly retest our boundaries by keeping an eye out for such “subversive activities”. By setting boundaries regularly and carefully, you value your life and the more you value it, the more accurate and selective you will become.

Clearly established boundaries will greatly relieve your burden and make your life easier. Decision-making processes will become much easier, there will be much less personal conflicts and difficulties. By knowing exactly what you want to do, you can live an enjoyable life. Your energy, your spiritual, mental and physical strength will be directed towards what you have chosen. Someone may not understand you, and someone will begin to envy you, but everyone will certainly notice your achievements and the spark of inspiration that will come from you.

A final word of caution regarding your boundaries. You will find that, essentially, manifestations of “subversive activity” can be organized into two main groups:

1. Obligations that quietly and imperceptibly form until you suddenly wake up to find that you are already under their influence.

2. Commitments that look worthwhile or seem like a unique and profitable opportunity, but you have to compromise your conscience by lowering your guard and allowing it into your life, ignoring your sanity, your priorities and the tasks to which you have committed yourself.

Determination and deep motivation are your life force along the long path of achievement. Don't let these powers be stolen or wasted. Set clear boundaries and defend them conscientiously.

Principles

You cannot be purposeful, if you want to do “everything at once”, be selective.

Boundaries are not restrictions, but certainty in choice.

Do not allow intrusions into the area of ​​your priorities, this leads to a loss of driving force.

Keep your boundaries from being "subversive."

Chapter 3

Have long term goals

In my book "How to achieve life goals" I considered the initial condition - there must be goals in life. The constant stream of letters and phone calls I receive from all over the world suggests that the message has had the desired effect. Most people who achieve success in any area of ​​life always set long-term goals for themselves. This does not mean that they never have short-term goals. They, of course, establish them, but only as steps towards progress towards achieving the final goal.

A constantly goal-oriented person always has long-term goals, because they guarantee motivational consistency. If you are truly serious about developing a purposeful lifestyle, then it is time to take a serious look at your long-term goal program to gain stability and direction.

Neither psychologists nor researchers in the field of the human soul have ever been able to fully explain what exactly happens to us when we devote our lives to worthy goals. History is replete with examples of remarkable victories and achievements in all kinds of areas of life that occurred because someone was driven by such a force of motivation that is akin to only supernatural. But upon closer examination, you will see that this motivation was the product of a passionate desire for goals that stretched into the future.

By setting a long-term goal, you declare to your spirit, soul and body that all your strength is focused and focused on what you are going to achieve, and you do not intend to give up or give up. Serious dedication evokes a powerful motivational attitude within your being.

Many people live with hopes and dreams, expecting that maybe one day, somehow, these dreams will come true. Dedication to long-term goals turns thoughts and fantasies into dream-oriented thinking because it sees reality in action. If you only dream, then you are content with a world in which what is desired is accepted as reality. But dream-oriented thinking decisively tames reality through an active course of action.

A long-term goal catalyzes motivation within you every day of your life. Your entire consciousness is focused and directed towards a specific task, the driving force of your motivation is at its best, because there is always an open path and direction for it. Often I meet and talk with some very successful people. Interestingly, older people who have long since retired remain inspired and motivated due to their long-term commitment. And this happens among people of any social level.

I firmly believe that if you commit yourself absolutely and completely to a long-term goal and set a time frame, it can actually set the course of your biorhythms, improve your health and increase your life expectancy. Many people (especially men) who have been fired or retired and left without a worthy long-term Goal would not be long-lived.

My years of successful and active social activity are an indisputable example of this. Moving to a smaller home, giving up daily responsibilities and the need to make an effort are sure signs that life is coming to an end. This is a sad but true fact. However, we can set the course of our biorhythms not according to the norms of retirement age, but based on our dedication to such life goals that will only increase as you move through life, right up to the end of your days!

Here are the simple principles of the mechanism of action:

1. Be clear about your goals.

2. Think through your strategy.

3. Anticipate possible problems.

4. Consider your reserves.

5. Relate everything to a time frame.

6. Create a master plan to achieve your goal.

7. Do - do now (see my book “How to Achieve Life Goals”).

No one is able to lead a purposeful and active lifestyle if he does not receive satisfaction from it. Short-term goals give a surge of energy and desire only on the path to achieving them. But usually all this fades away after the prize has already been won. Long-term goals prolong satisfaction because on the way to a distant goal, secondary, more important achievements are periodically encountered. This forms an important internal part of the process of achieving a long-term goal.

Successful people are never satisfied with the present and do not stop at what has already been achieved. No, they “press forward” even when they seem to have reached the peak, and amaze us with an even higher achievement. What is their secret? Everything is actually very simple. Their satisfaction lies in being dissatisfied with present and past achievements, because more and better can always be done. I call it inspired dissatisfaction, and if used wisely and positively, it can yield powerful motivational power and success.

Make long-term goals part of your life's dedication and experience the passion and joy that constantly fills a purpose-driven and inspired life.

Principles

A life purpose provides motivational consistency.

Long-term goals lead to dedication. Long-term goals transform thoughts and fantasies into dream-oriented thinking.

Long-term goals can actually reset your biorhythms.

Chapter 4

Develop a positive mindset

Here's a simple principle for developing a positive mindset: Look back at all the fears and negativism in your past and notice how unhelpful they were. Could a more positive way of thinking change every situation for the better? In Christianity this is called faith. In fact, the Bible is very clear that “all things work together for good to those who love God...” (Romans 8:28).

Positive thinking as an act of faith brings hope and produces good results in any situation. A positive way of thinking is aimed at constructiveness and creation, while a negative way of thinking is aimed at destruction and anxiety.

Has this often happened to you? You have a good idea, you are dreaming, developing something and are inspired by new possibilities. But you share it with someone and only get a negative reaction from them. All your inspiration disappears somewhere!

How often, for example, in business meetings have you given the decisive choice to those whose opinions are directly opposite to yours, and how many dynamic thoughts, ideas and wonderful plans for the future have crashed against a brick wall of negativism? The power of negativism lies in the fact that it locks us into the bonds of fear of impending disaster, darkness and doom. His ultimate goal is to make us do nothing at all.

Have you ever noticed how negative behaviors control a situation? Phrases like “I’m absolutely not sure about everything about this idea,” “If we do this, it will cause real problems,” “It will cost us too much” paralyze us, although they are often not supported by facts. Isn't it true that everyone would like to be surrounded by people with positive thinking? But it turns out that it’s not easy to think positively on your own!

Thinking positively means using your creative energy to find a way to cope with a situation, rather than draining mental and emotional resources by worrying about how the situation is “handling you.” This means turning a problem into a solution to a problem. This means that you need to develop an ability that can be called "mental substitution."

Let me explain. For example, your mind is gnawed by some negative thought, depressing and suppressing you. IN This is the time you focus on what you don’t want to see happen. In other words, you are not concentrating on the solution, A on destruction. Substitution thinking changes this picture, but it requires an investment of effort and imagination.

Firstly, write down ten points of what you would like to see happen. This may seem like an incredibly difficult task. But if you use your imagination, you can do it. For example, you would rather spend time on the beach, visit your friends, go to the movies, have dinner at a nice restaurant, help someone in their needs, earn more money, and so on.

Write it down while you think about it. When you have finally got it down in writing, read these points out loud at least twenty times and then begin to solve your negative problems. Force yourself to think only about solutions to problems. If negative thoughts return, resist it and focus on the solution.

Secondly, When I feel overwhelmed by negative thoughts, I try to brainwash myself by reading life stories of people who have overcome incredible odds. By doing this, I can be charged with positivity, experiencing the fact that they not only managed to overcome it, but continued to win.

Third, I can “disperse” negativism by doing something that requires the concentration of all my mental and physical strength, such as walking on a hard-to-control horse. I found it quite relaxing and refreshing for the mind and body.

Another principle I use is to read aloud daily notes that clearly communicate who I am, my relationships, responsibilities, and life goals. By checking this “list of truths” every day, I maintain my positivism and high sense of purpose.

We need to be careful to develop a positive mindset and not allow our subconscious to lead us off course. Very often you may not feel purposeful and full of positivity, but if you take active action, your mind and soul will follow your action.

Someone somewhere has already conquered the heights that you are about to conquer. If they did it, who's to say you can't? The only real difference that makes people highly motivated and successful is their attitude in life. Yours life position determines your standard of living.

Strive to see the positive in every situation. By doing this, you will undoubtedly find opportunities to grow and gain experience and new knowledge.

Avoid phrases such as:

I'm not sure

I can't do this

This won't work

I may fail

This is problem

This will finally wear me down

Better use expressions like:

I'll find how

I can do it

It will work

I can do it

This is an opportunity for me

This will help me grow

Remember the principles regarding goals and priorities that were outlined in previous chapters. Consider each of the principles in this book to develop a practical pattern of behavior that you can apply in your daily life.

Principles

Believe me, most heights have already been conquered by someone, so why can’t you do the same?

Actively do something practically, and your soul will “dispel”.

Develop “mental substitution.” Check the “truth list” every day.

Don't let your subconscious lead you astray.

Chapter 5

Develop high personal standards

Consciously or not, each of us has established standards of decency and honesty in business and personal life. In other words, we have a pretty clear idea of ​​what fair dealing is and what is acceptable and what is not. In any situation, without much pain, we can quickly assess how decent a project and our participation in it are.

We rarely break our commitments in business or personal life. However, this is not really a true indicator of high personal standards.

If you find it difficult to stay motivated and inspired, take a hard look at your integrity standards. Look deeply at the root of your past and present commitments and answer the question: “Would I treat someone else with the same integrity as I treat myself?”

I guess we treat others with more dedication and more honesty than we treat ourselves! Why don't we treat ourselves with at least the same decency as we treat others?

One of the main reasons we fail to stay focused at all times is because we don't treat ourselves as honestly as we treat others.

A highly motivated person keeps commitments not only to others, but also to himself. That is why such people always look and speak with great confidence and achieve their goals again and again.

Try a little exercise. Find someone you can compare yourself to and who you deeply respect, whether he is alive or dead. Carefully examine what exactly admires you so much about this person. If he is no longer alive, read everything you can about his life and explore areas you admire.

If we are talking about someone alive, perhaps you can invite him to have lunch together and ask him questions that interest you.

Pay attention to his manners and, based on this, make sketches of what you can imitate him in. Choose specific positive aspects that you would like to develop in yourself, and practice them every day. In this way, you can develop the worthy and outstanding qualities that you see in others.

Why shouldn't you be someone you yourself can admire? There is no misconception about this. In fact, the Bible is quite clear that we should love others as we love ourselves.

But be very careful not to play games with the subconscious when you take on such commitments, especially when it comes to personal character traits and changing life habits. The moment you make a promise to yourself, you make a decision to change your position in life. Essentially, you are announcing to your entire being that you intend to do something that will require your full attention and assistance. But if you change your word on this commitment, then in fact, at the level of consciousness and subconsciousness, you are hindering all your abilities to complete the task, you are making them useless. What happens next? The next time you get excited about an opportunity and make a commitment, your subconscious mind will respond a little slower and with less enthusiasm than before. It’s as if your subconscious mind remembers previous broken obligations and believes that the new project may not be completed, and therefore there is no need to put in all your efforts.

If you constantly break commitments, you are almost completely tied up and cannot complete anything because success is not registered in your subconscious mind. There is practically nothing in the “promises kept” account, and therefore your inner self does not show any attempts to take action. This is why it is so difficult to inspire ourselves again, this is why the affirmations and declarations we make to ourselves are so necessary. They help us overcome this strong initial resistance and help us form a sense of purpose. Don't play these dangerous mind games that will hinder your motivation and success and keep you from becoming who you want to be.

If it helps you, make fewer promises to yourself, but keep them fully, even the smallest ones. It's not so stupid to start by making sure to put your shoes in the same place every night. Do this no matter how late you get home, no matter how you feel, day after day. This may seem crazy to you, but it will really raise your awareness of your personal standards of integrity. You will prove to yourself that you can fulfill a long-term commitment on a basic level.

Experiment in achieving other ideals, build your integrity. Then you will see the driving force of your motivation increase dramatically.

I am constantly asked how to inspire others. One young man in a youth support group asked me, “How can I inspire the youth I am supposed to lead?” I answered him: “Show them that you yourself are purposeful.” So many of us want to inspire and encourage others, but we don't lead by example.

In order to inspire others, we must have high personal standards and demonstrate motivation in our own lives. To develop our personal motivation, we must develop integrity through dedication and stability at the conscious and subconscious levels.

Hold yourself to high personal standards. Treat your honesty as your very best friend that you can trust. Always treat it with sincerity and commitment, and it will bring you motivation and success.

Principles

Hold yourself to high personal standards.

Be someone you can admire.

Don't play dangerous games with your subconscious.

Follow through on even the smallest commitments.

Treat yourself like your best friend.

Chapter 6

Choose your friends carefully

Having friends is a wonderful privilege. Investing your life in close, worthy, loyal friends is probably one of the most worthwhile investments.

It may come as a surprise that comments on the topic of friendship are included in a book about how to be consistently purposeful. Then, first of all, let me give a negative illustration. If your friends are always criticizing, complaining, oppressed, negative, suspicious, dishonest, and constantly badgering you, will it affect your life? I assume that after a certain period of time you will become like them. Just as misery loves company and thrives on hopelessness and despondency, so optimism, honesty and trust thrive among their own kind.

Approach the selection of your friends carefully, with prudence and avoid communicating with those who are unresponsive and negative. Regardless of your occupation, avoid being the dominant figure in your social circle, the spiritual leader and the inspirer of the masses at all costs. Always strive to develop your relationships in a way that stimulates your individual growth and increases your motivation.

To some, choosing friends according to a certain pattern may seem like cold calculation, but if you think about it and consider this process in detail, you will recognize that it is wise.

First, a friend must be honest on all sides. I don't mean blameless by any means, but I do expect honesty in both personal and business relationships. There should be no place near you for a “friend” who tells you lies or half-truths. Honesty means frank and open discussions with sensitivity and understanding to the situation and the other person's point of view. I have real problems with people who cheat on their spouses. I believe that a person who is capable of breaking, for whatever reason, obligations in such a close relationship, is also capable of breaking any other obligation.

Friends are those for whom “yes” means “yes” and “no” means “no” in any situation and without further ado.

Secondly, develop a sense of humor. I like to know that I am able to find reasons to laugh and that those whom I regard as friends are also able to genuinely laugh, not only at me, but at themselves. If you look at everything in life gloomily and with deadly seriousness, then life will not become more colorful.

Of course, it is important to be successful and goal-oriented, but It will be much better if at the same time you do not lose the ability to enjoy life.

I remember how many times we found ourselves backed up against the wall and thinking there was no way out. But as soon as someone saw something funny in this situation, everyone burst into laughter. This restored and refreshed us, giving us strength to continue.

Kindness and humor help you see the best in others. These two qualities are extremely important, and those who possess them are much easier to collaborate with.

Thirdly, choose “high-flying birds”. I'm talking about those whose minds "accommodate empires." Not in the sense of the desire to conquer and possess, but in the sense of the ability to manage them in a way that inspires, teaches and motivates others to reach their peaks.

“High-flying birds” are always encouraging, always aiming upward, constantly thinking about ways to achieve their goals and are always able to see perspectives that others do not see.

“High-flying birds” are dreamers who know how to see their dreams through the prism of everyday reality.

Usually they are extremely demanding, first of all, of themselves, intolerant of laziness and petty dreams. They are productive, efficient and persistent.

Friendship with “high-flying birds” helps maintain the standards of your own life, encourages you to resist stagnation and not relax.

Fourth, be generous. I know many rich people around the world who have acquired their wealth through honest and hard work, but cannot share it with others. They can lend a car, a boat, a beach house, or anything else for temporary use, but only if they they will return it back. It is unthinkable for them to give it away forever.

Such people are spiritually poor because they have not learned the truth that giving brings deep joy and blessing. Generosity influences our inner self, allowing us to fully enjoy life.

I have never met a person who was truly successful in any field who was not generous, happy, and respected by his friends and family.

In the end, you see that my criteria for friendship are simple but effective: (1) honesty, (2) sense of humor, (3) high flying, (4) generosity.

Possessing these qualities, you yourself will be a great friend, and many will want to join your circle of friends. Try to make friends from different walks of life, and the diversity of their activities and characteristics will enrich you.

Sometimes I travel to the Australian wilderness by car, plane, or even on horseback or camel to enjoy the company of certain people. I have never found any living conditions unacceptable to me. The Apostle Paul said, “I have learned to be content regardless of circumstances” (Philippians 4:11). The ability to adapt to any social level will allow us to move to places where we can see life differently or learn to respect others and understand their problems.

Having recently visited the wilderness with several friends, I watched with interest how these “high-ranking persons” slept on the ground, endured unbearable heat and eat with one hand while shooing away flies with the other. In my opinion, you can really compare a person with others by how well he copes with difficult situations. Choose your friends wisely. They will raise the standards of your life and increase your sense of purpose.

Principles

Don't try to be the most outstanding person in your social circle, develop the quality of your relationships.

Choose your friends according to the standards of (1) honesty, (2) sense of humor, (3) "flying altitude", (4) generosity.

Make friends in all social strata.

Chapter 7

Live according to your own schedule

They say that water does not flow under a lying stone.

But many of us are waiting for each other and waiting for the development of events for all eternity! We are always controlled by those who are late. We have to constantly adjust our time boundaries to suit other people, and in the process we ignore or give up our right to follow your own time requirements.

It's almost impossible to stay motivated all the time while living according to other people's time zones. In fact, by allowing ourselves to become a slave to other people in this regard, we guarantee ourselves a mediocre life.

I think you had the opportunity to watch the scene of a family leaving for nature waiting for the last person to get into the car. Some people live, consciously or not, under the influence of an entire system that controls! lyrates others simply because of their constant tardiness!

Many business projects start from scratch, with all parties pitching in with equal rates, market forecasts, and budgets. Then it turns out that some group constantly needs more time to complete the project. In the process, everyone who diligently tried to fit into the required deadlines is delayed.

How then can a person remain motivated all the time, living in a world filled with delays, disappointments and broken promises? The answer lies in living according to your own schedule. This is achieved by creating a personal lifestyle based on efficiency and integrity.

This should show through your actions and communications. Show others that you have certain principles by which you work, and these principles cannot be violated. For example, how long do you wait for the person who made an appointment with you? 15 minutes, 30 minutes, one hour? What is your personal time frame? I will never wait for anyone more than 10-15 minutes, unless I am told in advance

it is known that that person may have good reasons for this. If I wait longer, I will be disrespectful to someone else who has an appointment and is on time. It's very rude to be late for a meeting, and waiting is very bad for your motivation. If you allow others to control your time and say nothing about it, you are enslaving yourself and blocking the flow of motivation.

Some people say that they never have enough time. However, there are 60 minutes in one hour, no matter who you are or where you live. The only thing that matters is how we use it.

How often do you let someone interrupt your day over little things, and then at the end of the day you don't know where all your time went? If you feel like you don't have enough time, you need to realize that you have all the time you can get.

It is time, not money, that is your greatest value, and during your life it cannot be redeemed or expanded.

Who wouldn't want to give everything they have to extend their time on earth? And yet we handle the gift of time unwisely because we use it poorly. We waste it as if it were the cheapest and most insignificant commodity imaginable.

Respect what your life consists of and manage your time so that comfort to do everything you need and want.

I was recently asked to take part in a project spanning the globe. He would occupy my time for a period of five years. Of course, the project was worthwhile and would certainly help many people. But at the age of 55 they are asking me to sacrifice maybe 20% of my potential working life. Such conditions were not particularly attractive. I had much bigger dreams and much different time frames that were of much greater value to me.

Time should be treated as your private property. Only you can hold it or release it for others. As the owner of such a powerful and valuable resource, you must allocate it wisely and skillfully. Control over your time has a significant impact on your motivation, as it makes you the captain of your ship. The course and speed of its movement depends on you.

Make a list of principles that apply to your time and let it be a valuable guide for your progress and prosperity.

It's amazing to me how often people who spare money for charity literally throw away their lives by wasting their time. There seems to be no relationship between values ​​and time spent in charitable work, but this is not the case. Let me explain.

If you help a charity for eight hours on Sunday and it makes very little money, is that time worth less than eight hours spent on vacation? And further, would you work for a commercial organization and get paid the same as you would for a day of dedicating your time to charity? Of course not.

If you want to help a charity during the day, then find the best paying job and give it back your salary! Then relax from the realization that you were not deceitful in allocating your time.

Long tea parties, long lunches, aimless walking around the office, talking too much, receiving late visits and simply wasting time are thieves in your life and limit your motivation. Also avoid situations where others place their time limits on you. Follow this diligently and you will be well rewarded.

When you work according to your own schedule, you respect your own time principles, you have the knowledge, responsibility and security that stimulate motivation and confidence. Working on such a schedule also creates incredible reserves of energy. This happens because you cut out the unnecessary and find that you have more time to work and greater concentration.

How frustrated you would be if you were constantly trying to fit into other people's schedules or developing a system of temporary values ​​for your life, sticking to them, but not devoting time to the people you love. A system of temporary values ​​will not be complete unless it includes other people - this is another of life's greatest investments. Only by treating other people with love and understanding can we treat our own needs in the same way.

Live on your own schedule to gain energy, get more done, be more effective and prosperous. By doing this, you will realize that it is almost impossible not to be motivated all the time.

Principles

Don't let other people's schedules control you.

Remember that time is your greatest asset.

Respect what makes up your own life.

Leave time for others too.

Remember: you have all the time you need.

Chapter 8

Minimize dependence on people

When I meet dignitaries from around the world, I am often amazed at how many people travel with them, how many people depend on them. It seems that once someone becomes important and famous, he needs to be surrounded by people, and this gives him confidence and protects him from the troubles of this world.

While in some areas it is necessary to have assistants and assistants, sometimes it seems to me that we exaggerate this to the point that it becomes almost impossible to survive without all these additional people. In the end, you become dependent on them, and they become dependent on you. As a result, this entire structure grows and feeds on itself. Everything turns into a bunch of administrative workers and committees, which, together with a special hierarchy, eliminates or reduces personal and corporate motivation.

People are surprised when I come to their country for two or three weeks with a medium-sized briefcase and a small bag of things. I have found that not only is it convenient and necessary to take the bare minimum with me when traveling, but also that by taking only hand luggage with me, I don’t have to wander around the airport waiting for luggage and can stick to a fairly precise trip plan.

Constant motivation contributes to the formation of principles in many areas of life, and they do not necessarily relate to any particular business.

To keep myself in check, every 12 months I go through my wardrobe and get rid of everything I don't wear. I have very few personal belongings and need very little to keep my business going.

I remember very well those early days of the real estate business when I worked from home and my office consisted of one room, a telephone and a toilet. How simple, but nevertheless how effective it all seemed as a percentage of the money I earned with such a small staff. No telecom operator, no secretaries, no public relations staff or other people "making the business successful."

It's not that I wasn't successful. On the contrary, I was successful by all criteria. I made and banked more money than organizations ten times my size. But all this was done with expediency and efficiency along with dignity and planning.

Of course, things are very different today, but at times I still turn to those early lessons and experiences because the power of personal motivation is maximized and distractions have been minimized.

I'm sure you've all played the game where 20 people take turns passing information to each other. By the twentieth person, this information reaches almost unrecognizable. This is why, in order to be well motivated, you need to minimize your dependence on people. I'm not suggesting firing the entire staff and going back to basics - a team of one. Not at all, but I propose to carefully reconsider our dependence on people and our demands on them.

I'm constantly amazed at how often someone's secretary will call me and then ask me to wait by the phone. While I'm waiting by the phone, the person who called me starts talking on the phone to someone else, which means I have to wait until he's free and we can talk about our business. I always try to shorten this by calling directly, responding directly to the person asking, and encouraging direct communication and minimizing dependence on people.

I carry a two-year calendar in my wallet so I can give feedback on my travel and employment plans wherever I am. This speeds up and facilitates the process of doing business. The simple fact is that the fewer people involved in a discussion, the less confusion and greater efficiency.

Let's not confuse big business with a lot of people. Consider the following situation. A few years ago I was asked to take part in a government project to increase the number of small businesses in Australia. I agreed with pleasure, knowing well that small business is the foundation of any country, and that it is from small businesses that large enterprises grow.

The conference hall was well equipped; at the end of it there was a presidium where a group of specialists was located. They thanked me for coming, and then the theme of the meeting was announced: “How can we develop and support small businesses in our country.”

Before the organizers asked me a question, I asked them to give me a definition of a small business so that we could work on the basis of common agreement and come to a practical solution. The question seemed to stun them, because they had never thought about the definition of “small business”!

After some time, the conference participants reached an agreement that a small business is an enterprise of up to 20 people. I shook my head, saying that this definition was incorrect. Then they asked about my definition of small business, to which I replied: “General Motors.” They thought I was joking and reminded me of the thousands of people who work for the auto industry giant. I reminded them that big business means big profits, not a lot of people. I told them that last year, despite the modesty of my business, I made more than General Motors, because they had losses! If they continued to move in that direction, they would have no business or people left at all.

Most people make the same mistake and associate big business with a lot of people. Typically, highly motivated entrepreneurs have only a few people reporting to them. I know a billionaire who runs his business with his wife at home, a part-time secretary, and an answering machine.

Don't be fooled into expanding your staff just for the sake of having more people on the payroll. Better look for highly effective and reliable people whom you can hire and manage a lot through them. But if possible, manage everything yourself.

I have a friend who runs a very successful and worldwide business. He has a very interesting system for minimizing dependence on people. He spends one day a year, from breakfast until late evening, individually with each of the six chief managers. They have breakfast together, and my friend asks in what areas and under what circumstances each of them thinks he has failed at his job over the past twelve months. He also asks how they needed to work to achieve their common goals.

My friend is always sincere, his warm and encouraging attitude encourages an honest answer. They spend the entire morning discussing each problem area.

After lunch, the employee usually asks my friend, “In what area do you think I have let you down or could have done better over the past year?”

These relationships of mutual creation and assistance continue until late at night, and they allow my friend to remain in the leadership of such a large organization for over 25 years.

What is the main idea of ​​this entire chapter? It certainly isn't about shrinking your dreams or the scale of your enterprise. The point is to reassess the way you do business and look for areas where you have over-staffed so much that efficiency has diminished.

Take stock and keep it simple. Let there be clarity on all levels, maintain relationships with those who have the answers or whose “yes” are always “yes”. In the process, you will find your motivation to increase.

Principles

Examine yourself for dependence on people.

Look for profit, not scale.

Keep in touch with the few who rule the many.

Connect with those who have the answers.

Chapter 9

Always maintain self-control

If you are going to become a goal-oriented person, you must always maintain self-control.

I'm not talking about dominating the lives of others, I'm talking about the principle of controlling your own destiny. We are talking about the constant confidence that you are in control and therefore you can change. It also means that others have no control over you.

Maintaining constant self-control can become a way of life with its own principles and directions, although this is easier said than done. Control does not mean keeping everything under control or never trusting anyone or allowing others to participate. This means establishing principles of direction that allow the initiative to develop within predetermined limits.

I often remember how Aristotle Onassis climbed onto the ships being built for him in the middle of the night, dressed in overalls and with a torch in his hand. The Greek tycoon double-checked everything himself so that the next day he could ask important questions to the shipbuilders.

He didn't build ships, but as a buyer and owner he never lost perspective - he knew that keeps the situation under control and if any accident or difficulty occurs, he will know about it.

Control means following your plan and schedule, power and leadership over your own life.

Dr. Robert Schuller said, “Never give up your leadership,” because leadership of your life and control of your destiny is our sacred and holy responsibility before God.

Dr. John Haggay once told me, “As long as God gives me breath and my name is on the letterhead, I must exercise the control given to me.” Both of these people experienced first-hand the severity and tedium of control, but this did not dampen their enthusiasm and strength. On the contrary, it sharpened motivation and experience.

Staying at the helm means paying close attention to contracts, partnerships, laws and small details. If you don't do this, you will notice that someone or some organization is leading you down a path that you do not want to go down.

Taking control means looking to the future and expecting events, carefully preparing for them. This does not mean explaining what you think happened after the event! If you give control of your life to someone else, to the whims of circumstances or events, then you are guaranteed a low level of motivation and dedication. Your dedication to your own plans becomes much greater and more certain when control is in your hands. Dedication to someone else's plan under the control of someone else will be at a very low level.

Be very careful about changing markets or directions that could take control away from you. A seemingly slow accumulation of events can cover you completely, and without you even noticing it, an unexpected change in circumstances will take you by surprise.

In my book" How to overcome a big crisis" I I talk about the need for financial reserves, friends and time and how not to lose control in times of crisis. I would like to recommend that these guidelines and reserves become a way of life for you. This will help increase your self-control.

Stay the course, check your steps, apply a set of proven principles of control, and the result will be peace of mind, progress and prosperity.

Then what's wrong with following someone else's plan and becoming a small part of a big picture rather than the main part of a small thing? Are there problems with motivation then? Actually, no, but only as long as you maintain control over your part of the work. Keeping things under control does not mean controlling absolutely everything. But that means have control over what you commit yourself to.

For example, if you are given control of a project with an agreed upon budget, but you have no authority to hire and fire people, then you obviously have no control. If you are empowered to see something through to completion but constantly have to ask permission to move forward, or you are given responsibilities that do not belong to you without the right to refuse, then you have no control.

Also remember, if you want someone to be motivated, then you must be willing, within agreed limits, to hand over responsibility to allow people to grow and expand. I have been delegating responsibility for many years, carefully setting guidelines, and to this day I do not remember people being left unmotivated. This has always expanded their capabilities.

Motivation has many components. One of the most important components of motivation factors is always maintain control in your hands. With the control factor comes complete dedication to yourself, and if you have that dedication, you have the best opportunity for motivation.

Principles

Control is the ability to make changes (at any time).

Control is the lack of ability for other people to manipulate you.

Control is following the agreed plan

Control is power.

Chapter 10

Take full personal responsibility

The first manifestation of maturity is taking full responsibility for yourself and your actions.

We can expect constant motivation from ourselves if we only take responsibility for our good or bad behavior. How can we expect others to trust us if we are unable or unwilling to accept full personal responsibility? If we want people to see us as reliable and trust us with their well-being, then we cannot allow others to take our responsibility.

My office reminds me of Mecca, where people come for help. They entrusted their money to someone or some organization, and it disappeared. There was no responsibility in that situation.

Many times I ask the question: “Have you asked this person to show you a list of his achievements?” The answer is always: “No.” Why do we constantly trust people or organizations without verifying the degree of their responsibility?

I think part of the answer is that we expect someone else to be more responsible than ourselves. From time to time there may be reasons for difficulties or even disasters, but you need to remain determined and correct the situation, saving what you can. Then full responsibility will be recognized.

If the Bible and the Christian Church teach anything, it is personal responsibility. We are responsible for what we do or are a part of, and one day we will give an account for it to God.

If God holds us responsible enough to accept salvation through Jesus Christ, then how can we act differently towards ourselves and others?

Taking full personal responsibility includes the level of our motivation - how we develop and maintain.

What CDs and books on motivation does our library contain? How often do we listen or read them? Do we emphasize these principles as we read and apply them to our lives? How much time a year do we devote to developing motivation? On average, a person spends much less time per year studying materials on motivation than he spends on cutting hair, and then wonders why he is not successful!

W. Clement Stone told me that to have a constant sense of purpose, you need to go alone every day and plan your life, stimulating motivation. He also says that approval, internalized or expressed out loud before making a sale or presentation, creates a motivational focus that helps you move forward and overcome rejection.

It is sometimes said that most businessmen and private entrepreneurs have their office windows overlooking a busy part of the street, because they want to see how something moves on its own without having to push it!

If we believe that motivation is the key to success and achievement, then we should pay more attention to it by taking responsibility and developing our sense of purpose. Consider spending at least 5% from your income for good books, seminars, CDs, DVDs and other information about motivation. Moreover, try inviting someone you admire to dinner. Be creative but responsible.

In his book "How to be happy even if you are rich" I focus on a formula for summarizing each day so that at the end of the day I can evaluate how my day went and in which areas I need to put more effort. Instead of simply judging your day as good, bad, awesome, mediocre, etc., why not develop a formula for evaluating each day that significantly increases your level of focus and action?

Taking full responsibility for your determination, you need to pay attention to your health and study your metabolism. I believe that highly motivated people, without exception, are energetic and active, even if they are limited by some kind of physical disability. Actually, you can increase your mental motivation through its manifestation in physical actions, just as it is difficult to remain physically passive while having a high level of mental motivation.

Many people suffer from low levels of commitment because they try to copy someone else's motivational patterns, such as going to bed late or waking up early, without taking into account their own personal needs. I have often noticed that some people who are trying to achieve a purposeful lifestyle are already exhausted and need more rest or sleep than others.

High levels of motivation have nothing to do with being flashy, talking loudly, and being super active. Many goal-oriented people are quiet and reserved, but their work always gets done. And in general, this is not an Olympic competition for endurance and activity, but rather an incentive to achieve and successfully reveal your full potential, which can be achieved in many different ways.

One final aspect about taking responsibility for your personal purpose involves agreeing to face situations, people, obstacles, challenges and rejections, even if you would rather not!

If you take responsibility for yourself, you can become responsible for others, and their trust in you will be justified.

Principles

If you can't be responsible for yourself, how can others trust you?

Responsibility means confrontation.

The key to Christian teaching is personal responsibility.

Total responsibility is a measurement of your achievements.

Chapter 11

Let determination become a habit.

Established habits are difficult to break. If this is applied in a positive way, the habit becomes a tool for achieving a sense of purpose.

A habit is the automatic execution of something. Such, for example, are our habits of drinking, shaving, and using the toilet.

The ability to make goal-orientation an automatic habit will make it easier for you to find motivation in the future.

I remember coming home alone one day and looking around. I saw garbage, threads, scattered clothes, pieces of paper, bags and everything else that was scattered by me. I was amazed to realize the truth that in my business and social life I can be organized and able to maintain order, but when I fall here, on my private territory, in my personal life, I slip into habitual dependencies , into sloppiness and irresponsibility. I really lived and thought that they would constantly clean up after me, and this actually happened.

I felt so ashamed of this that when my wife Robina came home, I sat her down on a chair (I didn’t want her to fall from surprise) and told her that as long as I was alive, she would no longer have to fold everything again and put everything away after me. . She really didn't have to do that anymore.

How did this happen? I have changed in the same way that you can change. I have developed what is called by force of habit, and it was formed as follows.

For several weeks after I made my promise to Robina, everything was fine, until one morning I arrived at my office, which at that time took me about an hour to get to. As I was about to walk in the door, I suddenly remembered that I had left my pajama bottoms lying on the bathroom floor. And here is the key that triggers the main principle: never allow exceptions to the rules.

Instead of going into my office then, I walked all the way back home to put my pajamas in the laundry basket. Of course, Robina said that it would be enough to just call her and she would understand everything. But in doing so I would be breaking my promise and the principle of building the power of habit. Of course, that day I had problems rearranging my daily routine, and I had to apologize to my clients. But I stuck to my decision to change and turn the problem into a useful skill through consistency.

To this day, I no longer leave behind a mess or things scattered around, because I have developed for myself a constant system of adjustment, which is called a habit and which works automatically, on its own.

It's simple, isn't it? Yes, simple and very effective. Why don't you start building the power of habit like I did? Purpose and activity can become an integral part of your life, being developed as a habit that you can have throughout your life.

If you don't stick to your decision, you're setting your subconscious mind to expect failure and get what you expect.

So, practically: make a list of bad habits that you would like to change so that you can develop good habits instead. Be careful and do not allow exceptions to the rules.

Think carefully and identify for yourself those skills that will confidently and accurately work to achieve the desired results. Don't get carried away by habits that look good and necessary, but are of little use for creating what you strive for.

A little about useful habits that will create your life.

1. Never be late.

2. Do what is most important and productive first.

3. In every important discussion, identify the key points for yourself.

4. Search, establish and explore the real target.

5. Finish what you start as quickly as practical.

6. In all circumstances, remain calm and objective.

7. Constantly update your thinking.

By changing your old habits and developing the skills listed above, as well as other skills aimed at creating a purposeful and successful lifestyle, you can literally change your entire life. Once a good habit has been formed, it is as difficult to break as any bad habit.

If you want to develop a new skill or change an old habit, start with something small. The amount of effort, discipline and care that will need to be applied may be much greater than you first thought, because you will have to make changes to the established situation and cultivate what is unusual for you.

Don't give up if you don't succeed at first! Start again, again and again until the old habit is repressed and the new one becomes part of your character.

Exercise is the easiest habit to form because it can be a consistent time at the beginning or end of the day. However, remember that exercise only serves to keep you in good shape to do your job. But that's not the very way you can do your job.

Strive to develop those habits that will contribute to your progress towards your goals and create in you the qualities to accomplish what you want.

The habit of living purposefully will be formed in you in the same way as other useful habits. And one day someone will come up to you and ask: “You are constantly active and purposeful, how do you manage to do this?”

Principles

Build the power of habit and bring useful skills to automaticity.

Never allow exceptions to the rules.

Objectively consider the skills you want to make a habit.

Don't give up: try again, again and again.

Chapter 12

Strive for something more

If you follow, you will notice that the great people of the world strive for great things and they have very deep and far-reaching plans for who they are and what their role in this life is. Winston Churchill said: "We are all worms, but I see myself as a firefly (shining worm)."

To always be purposeful, you need to have big prospects and long-term visions for the future and put your whole self into it. Many of us, using imagination and thinking, can create any carefree dream. But it takes deep dedication to bring a great, magnificent idea to life. Mahatma Gandhi, Martin Luther, Hudson Taylor, Henry Ford, Roger Bannister and many others paved the way by creating examples for us to follow. They showed us how this can be achieved.

World changers have big dreams and big ideals, but also persistence with dedication to getting the job done. I have never met a person with big dreams, moving towards their fulfillment, who would waste his time on petty, frivolous actions or aimless chatter. This does not mean, however, that such people do not have a sense of humor. On the contrary, they usually have a very good sense of humor, but they do not live frivolously or superficially.

One day I was sitting in a cafe with my son Graham, and we watched the parade passing by from the window. I remember Graham saying that it would be fair to assume that every person passing by is busy thinking about buying a new car, paying for school, paying off a house, going on vacation or preparing for retirement.

I noticed that the goals and desires of the founders of empires, no matter what lower stage of life they started from, were radically different at a completely different level. This is because they are dedicated to a grand idea that captures their thinking and, paving the way to the goal, gives them instructions on what to eat and drink, when to sleep and work. In this process, ordinary things that cause other people to suffer are simply resolved as trifles. These things are not taken into account because of the insignificant place they occupy in the overall plan.

If you want to always remain goal-oriented, you need that “big idea.” It will become the basis of your motivation.

I guess it's difficult for one person to convey or offer great purpose and direction to another. However, I believe that there are simple but effective principles that can be followed.

First of all, I believe that consistency is essential to the effectiveness of any great undertaking. If today someone does something that tomorrow will turn out to be outdated and unnecessary, then doubts arise as to whether it is worth devoting his life to this matter. Constancy leaves a reference point and a foothold for those who can go even further.

Doing something transitory does not mean doing something that will not fall apart into separate parts. In science, mathematics, medicine, education, industry, politics, religion and many other areas, perhaps this will contribute to the development or creation of new discoveries. This challenging task will help present and future generations take another step forward. Columbus, Galileo, Newton, Einstein, Churchill, Billy Graham and others each did something transitory in their respective fields that changed the course of history.

The second principle is that a big idea should have maximum impact. Sometimes this requires little, sometimes much. In any case, the size of this action is felt on a global scale. Sometimes it’s simply amazing how a grandiose idea can multiply and grow so much over time that it surpasses its author himself and becomes someone else’s dream.

The third and final principle is that a big idea must influence people, and for this it must be useful to them. No one would really want anything less than helping others.

With benefits for others expressed in practical and plausible terms, you will gain the strength and motivation to do your work and achieve your dreams.

As you create and achieve your life purpose, staying close and accountable to God's purposes will help you stay on track. I consider biblical principles and my commitment to Jesus Christ to be the guiding factor, the surest guard against arrogance, the source of strength, and the standard of ethics in any situation.

There will be times of disappointment, frustration and seeming hopelessness. But in fact, you will reaffirm your lofty idea again and again. When you feel insignificant, it will give you strength, and when you feel broken, it will lift you up. When your thoughts start to get confused, she will give you clarity and set you on the path.

Let your motivation match your dreams.

Principles

Commit yourself to a big idea.

A great idea has permanence.

A great idea has maximum impact.

A great idea benefits others.

Chapter 13

Always look to the future

When I wrote this book, I was 55 years old. I know for sure that meeting people in my age group undermines my sense of purpose.

People over 50, and sometimes much younger, often talk about the past, glorifying it and exaggerating its achievements.

I saw the times of the Great Depression and World War II, a time when there were no refrigerators, jet planes, air conditioners, microwave ovens, penicillin, heart transplants and many other things that we take for granted today. existing.

I have been a victim of diphtheria and lack of opportunity and personally experienced poverty,

polio and other troubles of life.

I believe that while we want to always be purposeful, even though we learn from the lessons of the past, we need to focus on the future because that is where we will always live.

There is a saying: “Nothing is as permanent as change.” Understanding this, we must take a close look at our attitude towards change. Of course, there are things that should never change - fundamental mental principles. For example, absolute biblical principles are immutable and final. Changes may result from the practical application of the principles.

Why don't we then accept change as inevitable and welcome it? At the same time, we must adhere to absolute principles and apply them within the framework of these changes. Welcoming change means changing our perceptions. They will come not as an enemy, but as a friend. We will see them as a challenge or a potential opportunity.

When you embrace change, it places you in the top percentage of successful people because you are not limited by the “status quo” and are not tied down by trying to stop progress. You may even be able to help plan the change, because many things will change over the next few years.

Why not create or program these changes yourself and be at the forefront, paving the way, implementing the strategy? When we invite change and participate in the process, it gives us a consistency in motivation that can last throughout our lives.

Just imagine - choosing a field of activity and dedicating yourself for life to being one step ahead of changes in this field. The motivation that will result from this - and will be required for this - will work like a machine, stimulating others and driving revolution in many fields of practical application throughout the world.

Being on the front line of change imposes certain responsibilities that must be fulfilled. It means putting something into action ahead of time and preparing the way for it.

I am by no means talking about creating change for the sake of change. I argue that we need to throw out everything old and introduce newness. But I believe that the inevitability of change can bring advantage and progress, and resistance is only to keep everything unshakable, meaningless and even destructive.

The point is to understand that change will come and there is no need to be afraid of it. You need to expect them and benefit from them. Some

change does bring with it; false alarms when old and tried and tested methods are used again.

Our focus in this book is on expecting and using change to improve and protect our lives. As a result, we have positive motivation and become part of these changes, whatever they may be.

Having no fears or apprehensions about a changing world will allow you to dispassionately explore potential benefits or problems before they consume you. All highly motivated entrepreneurs plan, talk and focus on the future because the history of the greatest human success has not yet been written, and the greatest achievements for now belong to the future. Thus, each new generation has the power in its hands to correct the mistakes of the previous generation and improve the next.

Very rarely does long-term motivation arise because has already happened more often - because must happen or may happen. For long-term goals that require a future focus, changes can be planned to adapt to circumstances and time frames. This provides benefits both personal and physical. Direct the gaze of those who are with you or work for you to the future - and you will see how they light up.

It is impossible to encourage a young person to look for a new job without providing him with future prospects. Thus, to increase and prolong your own motivation, you need to look to the future with plans, optimism and objectivity.

Principles

Welcome change.

Plan for change.

Manage change.

Do not go beyond the limits of unchanging principles.

Chapter 14

Inspire others

When you hear about disappointments, make a phone call, send the person a book, invite them to lunch. By encouraging and inspiring others, you will inevitably inspire yourself.

I have several books specifically for such cases. When I hear that people are facing problems, I send them a gift and sign it with words of motivation that should get their engine going again and let them know that someone cares about them. This shows that someone is interested enough in communicating with them - and in a very fruitful way. I do this for people I have never met and may never meet, but their response has always been recognition of the great effect it has always had.

If you go through life inspiring others more and more with your sense of purpose, you will notice that people are automatically drawn to you. This happens because even your presence serves as a huge vital stimulus for them.

When I speak, I meet a lot of people who want to tell me about their struggles and accomplishments, expecting and hoping that somehow I will approve of their actions, encourage them, or offer some fresh advice that will help raise their arrows. barometer of motivation.

Since it is impossible to communicate and inspire every person, always try to give them a word that will stimulate:

1. Approve of their intentions (if you agree).

2. Assure them of your confidence in their future.

Many times in my life I have been helped and motivated by others who have blessed me with the right words and encouragement. Like a sponge, I absorbed this water.

Sam Heyburn in Brisbane, Australia, is such a person. He rarely leaves someone without words of inspiration about how valuable that person is. It encourages you to achieve great things.

Dr. John Haggay, to whom this book is dedicated, did so much (without realizing it, I believe) for those he met and worked with, inspiring them with his good-natured determination.

Motivation is especially valuable when it is conveyed in the area of ​​leadership. Some use a position of power to control and manipulate, but this is an absolutely selfish, dominating and destructive way of influencing people. Inspiring by allowing others to share or fully embrace the glory and the challenge is a very good way to impart the gift of purpose. Giving other people the opportunity to participate and plan provides a level of motivation and inspiration.

Many will read this book and hopefully pass on this message to others. However, there will be those who will not benefit themselves at all. But just imagine, if this brings you success, what kind of world we would live in if all people had positive motivation. Maintenance of your car would be carried out immediately and, most likely, at half the price. Your phone bill would be half as much because people would call back right away. Your debtors would pay on time, and your creditors wouldn't have to re-send the bill! Reliability and positive dedication would become a characteristic of any business. Your positive attitude towards store assistants, newspaper delivery boys, garage workers, secretaries and many others will help make the world a more purposeful place.

Here are some simple principles on how to inspire others with your sense of purpose:

1. Never respond to a negative remark with reproach or criticism.- Always answer positively. For example, when someone says, “Isn't it a terrible day?”, respond with, “Well, it will allow some people to stay home and get things done.”

If they say to you, “Johnsy is a liar and a deceiver,” then answer: “You are an educated person. What could you do to help him change?”

2. Never agree with a person if he refers to bad habits as his lot in life.- encourage him to change,

suggesting methods and schedules, benefits and reasons for change.

3. If someone says you can't do something, offer them ten dollars in exchange for one reason why it won't work.

4. Be against negativism and passivity- challenge speech cliches and passivity, offer positive alternatives and ideas for success. Be bold but empathetic and promote the need for motivation as a powerful antidote to unemployment, failure, dissatisfaction and mediocrity.

Your lifestyle should definitely demonstrate your statements. Of course, there are those who talk about motivation and behave like they are in a show, but they rarely have the fruits of this in their own lives. There is always this trap where you talk about it, read books, listen to tapes and jump around like an orangutan, not producing goods and increasing debt.

Don’t deceive yourself and others by always daydreaming and not taking any action. Moreover, do not expect others to follow your principles and statements without personally experiencing any real results.

Good results speak for themselves - the better the results, the less need to say anything. Remove the burden of passivity from your friend by achieving success after success in the right and moral way. Share with others simple and profound principles that are already working successfully.

Once a month, why not email people you know with words of encouragement and principles that have helped and inspired you, that have worked in your life? Your influence on others will return to you in full, and on one of those bad days, on some “hard Monday”, you will receive a call or send a card with the words of inspiration that you need most, and will help you recharge your motivation for a long time.

Principles

Talk about the principles of determination.

Conquer negativism and passivity with positive suggestions and personal involvement.

Remember, the encouragement you give others will come back to you when you need it most.

Chapter 15

Be grateful, not critical

To stay motivated all the time, you need to have a certain mindset that allows ideas to flow freely, be open and disciplined.

The only thing that distinguishes those who growing, from those who slows down, is a grateful attitude.

When you criticize and complain about everything, it hinders your correction and growth, it dries up your enthusiasm, which is so necessary for achieving success.

Criticism is not only destructive and offensive to others, it also has a huge destructive effect on the person from whom it comes (see my book "How to be happy even if you are rich" chapter 10).

The Bible says that all things work together for good to those who love God (see Romans 8:28). When, instead of being offended and critical, we are grateful for what we have, we do not waste energy. This describes an incredibly powerful principle.

In an interview with W. Clement Stone in "Chicago Tribune" the reporter, pushing him to speak negatively, mentioned some things in his life that would be painful and disappointing to other people. But W. Clement Stone reminded him of his life philosophy: “In every adversity there is a seed or equivalent of greater gain.” So, from deplorable situations he extracts benefit and receives it, because he is looking.

Many years ago, when I had lost everything and was starting a new business, a friend came to me. He was surprised to see my persistence. He said that he expected to see me devastated and unhappy, not busy looking for a new business.

A friend asked me: “How can you continue to persist? Hasn’t this disappointment stopped you?”

I replied, “After recently taking responsibility for my situation and dealing with my own stupidity and the situation I was in, I realized that the only person who can fix everything is myself. In fact, I now have

more experience and therefore the second attempt will be much easier for me" (see my book "How to overcome a big crisis").

When you are grateful for your health, strength, opportunities and abilities, it allows you to stay ahead and increases your sense of purpose to the maximum level. Our essence consists of how we accepted and used the circumstances we encountered. To give up while we are still breathing is to accept absolute defeat, and this actually means the death of the spirit.

The gentle, confident acceptance and encouragement that results from a grateful attitude acts as encouragement to others and gives you the self-respect you need. Stroll through your city's magnificent libraries, art centers and botanical gardens and taste their beauty and inspiration. Realize that you, as a tax-paying citizen, have helped create such a fine example of dignity and value. In the process, your attitude of gratitude will increase and take your dreams to a higher level.

Gratitude in the midst of adversity increases motivation. But remember that it is just as difficult to be grateful in times of triumphant success, which can absorb energy and weaken desires, leaving you apathetic and tired.

Create a formula that reminds you of the good things happening in your life and use it as a catalyst to get your engine running again and maintain top speed.

Make sure that your grateful attitude does not become a support, leaning against which you would say: “Well, now I’m successful and I can slow down or stop.”

An attitude of gratitude brings with it certain obligations regarding those things that still need to be done. Wake up every day with anticipation of what wonders and surprises the day has in store for you and how you can grow from the day's experiences. To raise your level of determination, think about what still needs to be done and use today's opportunities as evidence of what can be achieved in the future.

Over many years of working in business, lecturing and motivating others, I have discovered some very interesting principles that seem to confirm that gratitude is inspiring. Those who are always looking around with suspicion rarely develop a clear, goal-oriented attitude. This mainly happens because they are constantly looking for and developing mistrust and suspicion, expecting that that's how it will happen!

Suspecting people are constantly bound by this mistrust and have never actually allowed their abilities to succeed. By doing this, they limit themselves and cannot remain fully focused at all times.

Greed is perhaps the greatest obstacle to determination - although it can and very often motivates people to action. The result is alienation, powerlessness and ultimate corruption.

A philanthropic philosophy or value system that benefits both others and oneself always leads to a fulfilled life, a dynamic and continuous sense of purpose.

Moreover, gratitude for success other people introduces bonds of friendship that in return create a climate in which positive inspiration flourishes (see: Philippians 2:3,4).

In fact, most people perceive the success of others as a threat to themselves, so when they meet those who are grateful for the success of others, they may find it difficult to believe it.

Taking genuine pleasure in the achievements of others - especially if it is your rival - is one of the most joyful forms of inspiration.

Principles

There is always a bright side to things. You can change any situation if you change yourself.

There is no love in criticism; gratitude exudes love.

Beware of suspicion and greed - two enemies of philanthropic purpose.

Be grateful for other people's success.

Chapter 16

Permanently remove anything that hinders your sense of purpose.

We all have this nasty habit of avoiding doing what we should be doing. We constantly do something useless, stupid or even destructive, and then we become confused, frustrated and waste time in despair. I had one such extremely negative habit, and it constantly depressed me and destroyed my self-esteem. It seemed that I was powerless to control or somehow get rid of it. But one day, while on a trip abroad, I got stuck at one of the Los Angeles airports due to snow drift. It was clear from everything that my flight was taking an additional 12 hours. I was upset and a little angry, because this put a lot of stress on my future plans, and I couldn’t figure out what I was going to do at the airport for those 12 hours. Robina was not with me, I was alone. I also didn't have any of my friends with me to talk to. I was thousands of miles from home.

I began to wander back and forth like a lion in a cage, and suddenly I realized that I was actually presented with a great opportunity. I found myself here alone, protected from everything that could disturb me, and I had enough time at my personal disposal during which I could do so many useful things. Is this why I go, for example, to the public library in my city in order to think, study, plan and reflect? Here I found myself in the same conditions, but at the same time I had much more time than I had been able to devote to this for many years.

Delight began to fill me. This was the moment when the biggest internal obstacle on my path to a purposeful and successful life began to crumble. I knew him too well, and it was not difficult to recognize what was happening to me. I started to move forward.

I dug deeper and deeper into my subconscious and wrote furiously in my notebook. I examined my usual excuses, petty reasons, and false rationalism. I carefully delved into each point until I dug out the true roots and causes of this terrible internal problem that was holding me back from successfully moving through life. I continued to research, delve, and reason for the next nine hours and found an answer that provided me with an antidote to my problem for the rest of my life.

The antidote I found and the principles I was able to apply to many situations gave me a new understanding, a way to manage my life and continue to stay in it for as long as I needed.

So - a challenge for you. Why don't you tame the biggest internal obstacle holding you back on the path to success? Turn your face to it, break it down, get to the bottom of it, explore it, keep asking yourself why, why, why, writing down the answers and measuring them not by how reasonable or even practical they sound, but with truth and reality. Once you have discovered the reasons why you are doing or not doing what you should be doing, continue to persevere with the antidote until you get it. The value that I have acquired through this search, I am ready to share with you. You will be able to erase forever what has bound you with disappointment, guilt and mediocrity.

Of course, there are also other internal obstacles and problems that you encounter from time to time. They may not look that big, but they are constantly annoying, and you really want to defeat them. Since such negative internal factors usually create negative situations in themselves, and this is repeated periodically, then why not promise yourself that any problematic situation that has occurred at least twice already needs to be seriously dealt with and eradicated?eel

Find a formula for dealing with what appears to be a recurring problem. By doing this, you will be able to remove from your life those obstacles that are holding back your motivational growth from within.

Beware of the habit of doing everything sloppy. Even if you rationalize your actions, you will still end up disappointed.

The main thing that has helped me and other highly motivated people is the ability to automate minimal daily responsibilities. These basic things should be reduced to the level of routine daily routine, and not plan every new day.

I suppose that you would still like to know what was my main internal barrier that was holding me back. It's simple. Why, when I have to do several

big or small things, do I do some and not others? Why did I allow some things to grow into a big problem, although I knew in advance that this was probably what would happen? Why would I do such a stupid thing as take only two trousers from my closet to have them cleaned when I knew for sure that three needed to be cleaned? Why did I allow certain things that were potentially dangerous for my business, although I foresaw and knew this? Why could I throw information out of my head that could help me? Why? Why? Why? In some cases the reason could be that I was upset about something, in others the reasons turned out to be more serious, but one way or another All they were, without exception, stupid.

As I scrutinized it all that day at LAX, I was looking not for a probable or convenient-looking cause for these situations, but for the real root cause. And this is what it was: consciously or unconsciously, rationally or not, brazenly or humanely, I chose what to do, simply proving my right to say “no!” I tried to preserve the right of free choice that God gave to man at his creation.

God never gave man the mind of a robot, He gave us free will, allowing us to be His image and likeness. I actually spent a long time proving to myself that I actually have this right to choose. And in the process, strangely enough, I made the wrong choices. So, if we are not attentive, even good things can serve as internal obstacles for us on the path to purposefulness.

Principles

Wrap problems into techniques for overcoming them.

Eradicate those internal obstacles that make themselves felt again and again.

Let your daily chores become automatic.

Don't look for convenient-looking or probable causes of internal obstacles - look for their real roots.

Chapter 17

Look for mentors

I think we have all been in such a situation when, having studied the assembly instructions, we tried to assemble a product purchased at a computer store or supermarket. We followed all the instructions, as it seemed to us, to the last letter, but we could not complete the work properly.

I remember spending many hours putting one thing together only to end up running out of pieces and having extra bolts! So I went back to the store to look at this completed product and immediately saw my mistakes. I was able to quickly retrace my steps, correct mistakes, and put the thing back together. And here it is - the final product.

I had a friend who was building a model airplane and he couldn't do it, even when he followed the instructions. But after seeing an identical model, he was able to quickly complete the task.

The same thing happens with motivation and people, because even reading books, listening to tapes and studying various manuals is not enough until we we won't meet someone, we don’t study his style and manners, and then everything falls into place.

This is not to say that books, CDs and manuals are useless. On the contrary, if you do not study them diligently, you will not understand the principles. If you do not understand the principles, then when you see them in action, you will not recognize them, you will not understand how they work.

Many of us need mentors - role models, people who have developed and tested principles over many years and have shown the results of it. Mentors are important because they are living proof that the complex and sometimes seemingly impossible can be done and done very well.

I find mentors by reading biographies, and this takes up most of my reading time to this day. I try to vividly imagine myself next to the person described in the biography. I identify myself with what I read, and in some incomprehensible way I manage to penetrate the story and become a part of it, as if to experience all its ups and downs and, having such involvement, learn from the experience studied.

Mentors in books are often presented in very dramatic ways, making them seem much larger than they are in real life. This usually presents us with a tremendous challenge to reach new and unexpected heights in our determination and resilience.

I discovered something interesting - people who become famous for their achievements are less great in real life. Sometimes I even noticed that they are quite naive in some areas. But when I got to know them better, I saw their ability to motivate.

I have no doubt that when we see a model in practical action or explore personal experiences and lifestyles through the written page, we can expand our own way of thinking and strive for our personal level of achievement.

Why not choose mentors in different fields to broaden your outlook on life?

I also choose my mentors from those who have died, and by reading and learning all I can about them, I can create a pattern of principles that have been forgotten or rarely used. By doing this, I enjoy discovering some benefits and apply them to many life situations.

There is some kind of magic hidden in those mentors who have already died. There is something akin to famous artists and sculptors. After their death, their achievements are fully visible

Whatever your situation and goals, you need explore a working model in real life or in a written book. You will see that others have been through good and bad, experienced ups and downs and still survived. Usually, having an extraordinary sense of purpose, they reach the understanding that nothing can break them. They are always ready to act at the first sign of a challenge.

If you are in a difficult situation and need inspiration, think about your mentors. What would they do? What would they tell you? What would you answer them? Imagine what effect it would have on you if you suddenly found yourself in their presence?

My greatest mentor is Jesus Christ, who I believe has given us all the greatest legacy of service, sacrifice, and victory for the benefit of all.

Principles

Mentors show us a model at work.

Mentors reaffirm principles.

Mentors inspire us to never back down from a challenge.

Mentors teach us the secrets of determination.

Chapter 18

Let the incentive become your integral part

We all work based on incentives. Everyone knows that without stimulus we quickly get tired and our energy dissipates. Incentives can be different: prestige, power, wealth, location, compassion, love, hatred, leadership. They can be material or spiritual.

Whatever it is your incentive, it should be of interest to you personally.

In fact, speaking of determination, I cannot remember a single incident in my life that did not involve some kind of benefit for myself or other people. People always have some motives, something drives them, and it will be so as long as humanity exists.

We are all driven to action by some cause, be it secular, military, political, religious or commercial. History confirms this fact.

Many years ago I was in a broken state. I failed in business for the third time - things looked worse than bad. Then I needed some kind of incentive that would motivate me, although everything seemed doomed. I saw these stimuli clearly in my mind day after day and worked on them valiantly and consciously. In the process, my thoughts, style and behavior rose to the level where I was already looking at what will happen, and not for that what's happening. The effect was amazing. One of my incentives was to buy a gold Rolls-Royce with cash for my fiftieth birthday.

At times, the reality of some incentives seemed almost funny when every day I had to grab hold of life and fight the problems that haunted me. But I persisted, believing that my persistence would produce the electricity that would make the engine work, and it helped.

Before my fiftieth birthday, I had a gold Rolls-Royce, bought for cash, and this happened not as a pleasant surprise, but as a matter of course. Many of my other personal altruistic incentives were also achieved.

If you want to be goal-oriented at all times, if you take your life seriously and want to win, then why don't you create your own incentive system?

Any system of creating incentives should take the form of a program to achieve goals. It must have a clearly defined time frame and sufficient clarity. These incentives should not take the place of your main life goals, they must fit into their framework. They should constantly serve you as a scale and measure, like a school magazine.

What's interesting to me is that as soon as one goal is achieved, a new and fresh motivation immediately appears. This stimulates our thinking and pushes us to new plans and incentives. No one will do something for a long time without receiving reward. The Bible clearly says, “Give, and it will be given to you” (Luke 6:38).

Don't feel selfish or unworthy. Sit down and write a program of personal incentives for yourself and those you love, and the needle on your motivation barometer will jump up.

Divide your goals into weeks and months, and then into longer periods.

Your children, your staff, your partners can be motivated by incentives that provide for their needs. These goals will be their incentive to take the desired actions. Why not have your own reward system that works as soon as the result appears?

Many years ago, our entire family had a simple short-term goal: as soon as I sold a couple of properties in a week, we would all go to the Australian countryside, live in tents, ride horses. Sometimes we just stayed overnight, and sometimes for two or three days. But this was the goal that we all knew about. Every evening, coming home, they asked me: “Well, did everything work out?”

Motivation itself needs motivation! A clear ethical set of initiatives can help achieve this.

Principles

Incentives work for others - why shouldn't they work for you?

Make a list of incentives that meet your own needs and the needs of others.

Spread your incentives across the short, medium and long term and this will give you a consistently high level of motivational power.

Use incentives to motivate your motivation!

Conclusion

I tried to present on the pages of this book what has been tried and proven in practice, which has inspired me and thousands of other people of various professions in many countries around the world.

I hope that you will find in this book the key that will help you ignite the fire, inspire you to strive for great achievements for the benefit of yourself and others. This will serve as confirmation of God's greatness and goodness towards you. Yes, it is possible to always be purposeful - if you want it.

Life is not an exam, we do not have to report on our work and achievements. The only person who definitely needs to know what you are striving for and how you are progressing is yourself. If you don't like floating at the mercy of the waves, learn to set goals and achieve them.

Unfortunately, most people live, . They go to work, relax after work in front of the TV, have a fun or not so much weekend. Sometimes they get sick, sad, have some desires and dreams. Some of them are carried out or come true by chance, but most of them are not. And then to the question “Dreams, dreams, where is your sweetness?” (from A. S. Pushkin’s poem The Awakening) the answer comes to mind: “The dreams are gone, the disgusting remains!” or “Winter has come, old age has appeared.” And the word “dream” is often used together with the words “fruitless”, “empty”, “impossible”, “reckless”.

In congratulations to friends and relatives, we wish them fulfillment of wishes and “dreams come true,” but we should wish for them. A person who lives aimlessly can be compared to a ship that has lost control. No one knows how the journey will end, with salvation or death, whether the weather will be calm or the ship will be caught in a storm that will break it against the rocks, or run aground. The Roman philosopher compared people living aimlessly to a blade of grass floating along a river to wherever the waves take it.

Having goals in life means giving it direction. The one who achieves them is the master of his own destiny, and this raises his self-esteem, gives him a surge of strength and energy to move forward.

Dreams do not oblige you to anything. But if we want them to come true, we need to turn them into goals and strive to achieve them - become goal-oriented. American author and management expert Zig Ziglar said that “Most people who want to achieve a dream and fail do so not because of a lack of ability, but because of a lack of determination.”

Perhaps to someone such a character trait as was passed on with genes. Perhaps children of purposeful parents will grow up to be purposeful. But what should others do who don’t want to go with the flow in this life? American psychologist Orison Marden derived his formula for achieving a goal: “... this is the certainty of the goal, knowledge of what a person wants, and a burning desire to achieve it.”

"I see a purpose, but I do not see obstacles!"!

1. To become goal-oriented, you need to define your personal goals.

This is already half the success. But for many people, setting goals is a difficult task. When asked about their goals, they answer in a confused and vague manner. The classic of American literature, W. Irving, generally believed that most people live guided by their desires, and only “high minds” are capable of setting goals.

So, if we intend to change our life, if we want to manage it, play a major role in it, we need to answer several questions in writing.

The questions are:

1. What do I want to achieve before I die?
2. What to possess?
3. What kind of housing would you like to have?
4. Where would you like to visit?
5. What people would you like to meet in person?
6. How much would you like to earn?

For each question you need to give detailed, detailed answers (except for the last one, which requires an unambiguous answer). For example, meet with David Beckham, Guy Ritchie, etc. Build a country house in the Provence style and describe in detail how we see this house. Or maybe we dream of a city apartment in a house built in the 19th century - what do we imagine it to be? Or do we want to visit the annual carnival in Venice?

The questions are not difficult, and even pleasant, but they require concentration. The experiment showed that out of 10 people who received homework during the training to answer them, only one completed it. How can people want to change and become purposeful if they don’t bother to write down their goals in detail? Most of them are happy to plan their weddings, thinking through the details, but do not consider it important to plan their lives! They will find a hundred reasons not to do this.

Detailed answers to the questions listed above play another role: while thinking about them, we can come to the conclusion that some goal is “not ours”, and we can easily cross it off our list of desires.

The process of defining and forming goals is called goal setting. This term is especially popular in trainings and courses for managers.

1. The question about your main goal must be answered quickly - within 30 seconds. What we think about during this time will be the main thing for us;
2. Answer the question: if we knew that we had no more than six months to live, what would we want to do during this time?

Another experiment demonstrates the undoubted benefits of goals written down on paper: graduates of one of the respected universities were asked which of them had clearly written goals for the future. There were only 3% of these. A few years later, sociologists returned to the fate of these young people, and it turned out that it was those who had detailed goals who achieved greater success and material wealth than others.

2. We create a tree of goals, or break large goals into small ones

For example, we are planning to buy a house - this will be our main goal. From it we draw branches with subgoals. What do we need to? Solve financial issues. How can we do this so as not to drag out this pleasure for years? Find a job that will pay more. But for this we need to master another programming language, learn English, etc. In order for us to have the strength to withstand the workload, we must take care of our health. For this purpose, we can sign up for yoga classes, swimming, etc. It’s also a good idea to think about proper rest, which means planning a trip to the mountains, to the sea, or somewhere else.

We break all subgoals into even smaller ones. For example, when planning a vacation, we book tickets, a hotel, and buy beach items. As a result, we should get a kind of tree called a “goal tree”.

3. We specify the deadlines

“Tomorrow, tomorrow, not today, all lazy people say,” says a German proverb. If we draw up a tree of goals, but do not decide on the deadlines, then they will remain unfulfilled. “Tomorrow”, “from Monday”, “from next month”, “from the new year”, “someday” - achieving goals will take years or they will not be realized at all due to missed deadlines!

4. We do visualization

In short, we can say that it is a mental representation of the desired goal as if we had already achieved it. Before practicing visualization, it is worth mastering muscle relaxation, proposed by the American doctor E. Jacobson - it will help relieve emotional and muscle tension that prevents you from focusing on visualization.

In addition, pictures and photographs with objects of our desires depicted on them or reminiscent of them, which can be hung in a visible place, will intensify our actions.

5. We constantly monitor the situation as we approach the goal

It is not enough to determine the deadlines for completing tasks on the way to the goal; we also need to monitor how well we meet them. Therefore, do not forget to check your plans at least once a week.

6. Use the SMART method

The name was given by the first letters of the words specific, measurable, attainable, realistic, timed, which respectively means specific, measurable, achievable, realistic, correlated with time.

Achieving a goal directly depends on how well it meets these five characteristics. For example, if we set ourselves the goal of earning money for a new car in a month, then it will be doomed to failure in advance, unless, of course, we accidentally win the lottery. The goal of quickly losing 20 kg without compromising your health will be equally unrealistic.

Setting goals that are unattainable means dooming yourself to failure in advance.

7. We don’t tell anyone about our goals.

Except maybe for the people we trust. Sometimes it is advised, on the contrary, to involve as many people as possible in your plans. This should supposedly be an incentive to carry them out - who would want to be branded as a windbag!

But there is another danger here: they will ironically tell us something like “well, well, let’s see what you can do,” “if you were going to fly high, it will hurt to fall.” And the spark in us will go out, our hands will give up, and we will not have enough strength to move towards the goal. You can only initiate your plans into someone who says: “I believe in you!”

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To begin with, I would like to recall an episode from the wonderful film, “Moscow Doesn’t Believe in Tears.” Remember how the head of a light industry enterprise instructs his subordinates: “I don’t ask why it didn’t work out, I ask what was done to make it work?” Wonderful words that reflect the very essence of the issue of setting goals and achieving goals.

Each person always has two options for building and developing his life, establishing himself in society:

1. “Lying on the couch,” complaining about careless managers and the financial crisis, while finding a lot of excuses for their inactivity.
2. Correctly set tasks and goals, and find options for achieving them and successfully solving them.

It’s not enough to just set yourself a goal to achieve something. This needs to be done correctly. Correct goal setting means at least 50% of the final result will be successful.


Don't build castles in the air. Unfulfilled dreams will remain unfulfilled. The goal must be real, tangible. You can, of course, set the goal of delivering a “star from the sky,” and for the rest of your life complain about the imperfection of technology and the stalling of scientific and technological progress, which do not allow you to fulfill your dream.

Once again, the goal must be realistic! This is a prerequisite for success!

Determine for yourself one big, main, final goal. Write it at the top of a blank piece of paper, titled "How to Achieve Your Goal." Now, using a bulleted list, add intermediate, less global goals below, as necessary stages - steps to achieve the main one.


The ideal option would be to indicate opposite each step the ways, means and deadlines for achieving the goals.

Hang your action plan above your desk, above your bed, and ultimately, on the inside of the bathroom door... The main thing is that he catches your eye as often as possible. And cross out intermediate steps as you complete them.

And further. Visualize tasks and goals. Imagine and speak them. It’s not for nothing that it was said that first there were THOUGHT and WORD, and only then DEED! The laws of the universe have not been canceled.

So, the task has been set. Methods and means are defined. The list of main and intermediate goals is before your eyes.

But this is still not enough. This may sound like a pun, but to achieve your goal you need to become goal-oriented. How to achieve this?


There is nothing tricky about this issue. The main thing is movement and communication, “water will not flow under a lying stone.”

Perform, one by one, all the necessary actions to achieve the task. Don't sit idly by. Make it a habit at the end of each day to ask yourself, “What did you do today to achieve your goal?” And let you be ashamed if nothing happens.

Communicate, achieve, meet the right people. The main thing is to move, don’t stand still. Don't put off necessary things until later. Just start following the steps, and you will see how daily, routine work will become a habit and begin to bear pleasant fruits.

Yes, in principle, everything has already been said. Let's simply structure the above stages of achieving the goal:

• Statement of the task broken down into stages.
• Visualization and voice of actions and goals.
• Determination, movement, communication, completing tasks.
• Analysis of the work done and adjustment of the planned stages, if necessary.
• Celebration as each milestone in the strategic plan is achieved.

Yes, the last point is not a typo. Mark, celebrate the end of each stage of your actions towards achieving the final, global goal.


In fact, this is a fairly important element of your determination.