Why is a person aggressive? Psychology. What is aggression in psychology

We are all used to discussing male aggression and how to deal with it. Many are concerned about the problem of the growth of children's aggression in our difficult times. Do women really not show any aggression? Of course, this is not so, and women can also be quite aggressive, but they often justify their behavior by saying that it is self-defense from aggressive men, fatigue and an unfavorable external environment.

But female aggression is not always self-defense. Very often, women are led by their emotions and, instead of solving the problem, simply take out their anger on their husband or children. This leads to the formation of an unfavorable microclimate in the family and can destroy it, as well as become a source of psychological discomfort for children and a source of problems in future socialization.

Why does female aggression occur?

Usually the main cause, as well as the consequence, of female aggression is misunderstanding and powerlessness. If a woman feels that she cannot express herself, cannot solve the accumulated problems and does not have any support on the way to solving them, this can provoke an emotional explosion, an outbreak of aggression towards loved ones, for example, her husband or children.

Don’t think that this is something out of the ordinary - aggression is a normal reaction of the body, it activates forces and gives energy to solve problems, although not always in a constructive way. Often aggression helps to defend against a threat and overcome an obstacle, but only if its energy is directed in the right direction. But aggression can be a positive phenomenon only if it is aimed at solving a problem and has a short-term manifestation.

If aggression becomes a constant companion, and it begins to periodically “break down” on family members, this indicates that such aggression is unconstructive. Most likely, its cause is chronic fatigue. This is especially true for residents of megacities - constant noise, a busy pace of life, plus minor troubles in the family force a woman to constantly be captive of negative emotions, which periodically spill out on loved ones.

Another reason for female aggression, especially for women who are on maternity leave, is a lack of communication and opportunities for self-expression. A woman begins to feel like a service staff working for her child and husband, so she gradually accumulates a negative attitude towards them and sooner or later it can spill out.

Female aggression is the path to loneliness and self-destruction

The main difference between female aggression and male aggression is the absence of direct physical impact.. Men are more likely to act with physical force, while women are more likely to attack emotionally or verbally. Typically, women shout at children, shout at men, break dishes or home decoration less often, and physically beat them even less often.

At the same time, most women justify their aggression by unfair treatment of them, lack of money, attention or time. Very often, women use obscene language or phrases like “I would kill”, “I wish you would die”, etc. to express their feelings. This does not mean that she is ready to kill physically; rather, it is a sign of aggressive impotence.

A woman in this state is weak and vulnerable, because she cannot solve the problem and replaces its solution with an outburst of aggression. If a way to solve the problem that led to aggression is not found, such behavior can become habitual and gradually the woman herself, having become accustomed as much as possible to discomfort, begins to consider her life normal. Aggression becomes the norm of family life. Often children in such families also grow up to be aggressive.

What are the consequences of a woman’s constant aggression? There are many of them, and the first is problems in finding a life partner, since men feel the “aroma of aggression” on a subconscious level. The second is the appearance of wrinkles - “masks of aggression”. Third, problems with blood pressure and the cardiovascular system. Therefore, it is necessary to avoid the increase in female aggression by any means.

How to avoid an outburst of aggression

To avoid a surge of aggression, the woman herself needs to control her emotional state, because no one will understand her feelings better than she herself. If you feel that tension is increasing, immediately analyze the reasons for this increase. Remember, a person who is satisfied with life is not enraged by a dirty cup near the computer; if such little things begin to irritate you, you need to take care of your psychological comfort.

The first thing to do is take a break. Perhaps you just didn’t get enough sleep, you’re tired, you have a lot of work. There is no need to be afraid to tell someone about your condition; sometimes you just need to tell your loved ones about your fatigue and ask for help. In addition, you can try to give yourself a couple of pleasant sensations. Ask that no one disturb you in the evening, take a bath, have a treat, listen to music. You can also take any sedative.

If it seems to you that you cannot realize yourself, this is not a reason to lash out at your loved ones, this is a reason to analyze the reasons, look for new ways to realize your needs. If emotions run high, you need to give them an outlet. At the same time, it is important to remember that family members are not to blame, there is no need to make trouble, you need to find another outlet for emotions, you can run, beat a punching bag, knock out rugs, etc.

How to deal with aggression yourself

The inability to cope with one's own emotions is one of the most common reasons for visits to psychologists. But not all women can afford to spend time and money on visiting a specialist, so they try in every possible way to cope with the problem on their own. For such women, several tips have been developed to help put their emotions in order.

If you feel angry, you need to sit down and describe what makes you angry.. Most often, anger passes during the process of description, but if it does not pass, then the sheet with the description can be torn and thrown away, taking out the evil on it.

Another way to get rid of aggression is to be alone with nature and just relax a little.. You can go to the forest, sit in silence, or, on the contrary, shout out. If complaints have accumulated against a specific person, for example, a boss, then you can express everything in any form, shout and even kick snags, this will help get rid of most of the negativity.

If your husband causes aggression, you need to try to inform him about it as correctly as possible. Men are designed in such a way that they can simply not understand and not notice insults and hints, and then sincerely wonder why a woman is crying and screaming, and from where. Therefore, you need to learn to talk about everything, gently and civilly communicate your dissatisfaction to your husband and accept his comments just as calmly.

And further it is very important to notice the positive. There is no need to dwell on the bad, scroll through grievances in your head and look for new reasons for them. It is important to notice the good, praise your husband and children for their actions, enjoy the little things, and soon you will notice that those around you begin to treat you more favorably and there are fewer reasons for aggression.

Aggression(from the Latin “attack”) - active or passive behavior aimed at causing physical or moral harm to oneself, another person, an animal, as well as causing damage or destruction to an inanimate object. But the psychology of aggressive behavior is much more subtle than it might seem at first glance.

Aggression seems natural, because it is an indicator animal began in man. Z. Freud, in particular, explained the phenomenon of aggressive behavior by the unconscious attraction of each person to death and destruction. But people are not only biological, but also social beings who are intelligent, cultured and civilized.

Why is reason and will not enough to pacify the impulse of aggression in oneself or in another person? Why is it that the more humane a society is and the more the ideas of “world peace” are preached in it, the more money is spent on armaments and improving the army, instead of improving the education and healthcare systems?

It would be logical to assume that, being born and raised in a cultural society, a person must learn to restrain instinctive aggression and transfer it into a constructive direction. However, everything is completely vice versa! Most scientists agree that aggression- the result of social learning.

Born an innocent and initially peaceful being, the baby studies act aggressively while looking at parents and other people. Not a single person from birth knows offensive words, psychologically painful techniques, or actions that cause suffering to others. People learn all this.

It is impossible to protect a child from learning aggression, because it is everywhere, it is not difficult to see it, you don’t even need to leave the house, just turn on the TV. It is impossible to completely isolate a child from society; this would mean depriving him of his life.

With intelligent parents who set an example of moral behavior, the child can also behave aggressively. After all, even knowing how one should behave, it is easier to choose the path of aggression, even though it is more primitive.

Aggressive behavior, as well as its opposite - passive behavior, is easier to implement than assertive behavior (non-violent, presupposing respect for the other person and oneself), because aggression does not require the application of significant mental energy and time.

Motives for aggressive behavior

The child quickly understands that aggressive behavior allows you to get what you want more efficiently and quickly; aggression helps to manipulate people, makes them fear, respect, and obey. Thus, you can earn respect among your peers by always helping them in difficult times, or you can force yourself to be respected (and in fact, feared) by once having a successful fight with one of them.

And in adults, the motives for aggressive behavior mostly remain the same: goal achievement or satisfaction of needs in power, prestige, respect and the achievement of other benefits.

All motives for aggressive behavior can be divided into groups:


The motives for aggressive behavior are not always understood. For example, one interlocutor asks another too difficult a question, assuming that he may not hear the correct answer, but does not realize that this is humiliating him and does not admit his hidden hostility.

The problem of aggression in society

Unfortunately, if parents show aggression towards a child, and he begins to act also towards others, then he will use the same violent methods towards himself when he grows up.

When external parental control is transformed into internal self-control, the adults begin to say those orders, threats, insults that the child heard to himself, and later to his children. Breaking this “vicious circle” is very, very difficult.

Psychologists predict that with an increase in the number of families where physical or psychological violence is observed (and there are already many), aggression will transform from an immoral phenomenon into norm of behavior.

If they did not believe in a child, did not notice their abilities and talents, he will grow up to be an insecure adult, an unsuccessful person in life; if he was humiliated, an inferiority complex will appear; if he was punished using brute physical force, with a high degree of probability, he will learn self-humiliation and self-flagellation (and not only figuratively, but also in the literal sense of the word).


Auto aggression
(aggression directed at oneself) is no less dangerous than that directed outward. TO forms auto-aggressions include:

  • food addiction, morbid overeating or starvation,
  • chemical dependence (drug addiction, substance abuse, alcoholism),
  • victim behavior (behavior of a “victim”, tendency to become a victim),
  • autistic behavior (withdrawal, isolation, self-restraint),
  • fanaticism (commitment to ideas (religious, national, political, sports) taken to the extreme),
  • extreme sports,
  • self-harm (cuts, hits, burns, etc.),
  • suicide.

Aggression as a personality quality

The habit of acting aggressively forms a special quality in a person – aggressiveness. Aggression and aggressiveness are not the same thing. Aggression is an action aggressiveness is a personality quality. Anyone can behave unknowingly aggressively, but only an aggressive person is capable of intentionally causing harm or pain to another person.

Aggressiveness- this is a readiness for aggression, as well as a tendency to perceive and interpret the actions of other people as hostile. The prerequisites for the development of aggressiveness lie in personality characteristics, attitudes, principles, worldview, but external reasons can also cause it.

It has been proven that situational factors independent of the individual such as noise, heat, stress, polluted air or lack of it increase the level of aggression. Even the kindest person in a stuffy transport crowded with people will feel discomfort, irritation, anger, rage.

The psychology of aggressive behavior is such that if aggressive behavior pattern at least once it turns out to be effective (for example, a person achieved his goal by using physical force), it will gain a foothold.

Aggressive people are usually punished in various ways. A kid who hits another child will be put in a corner on buckwheat, and an adult criminal who kills a person will be imprisoned.

All methods of punishment are aimed at personality change, re-education, correction, but they are rarely effective. A person who has learned to respond blow to blow will not relearn how to act differently, no matter how long the sentence he is given, unless internal work is carried out on himself.

It is not easy to come to your senses on your own, without outside help and support. It is difficult to notice your shortcomings, especially if they help you survive, are useful and are habitual.

However, aggressive people need psychological correction of personality and behavior.

As a rule, all aggressors need formation:

  • adequate self-esteem,
  • self confidence,
  • mature outlook on life,
  • new behavior patterns.

The roots of aggressive behavior can be very deep, and psychological correction alone may not be enough. In this case, you need to contact a psychotherapist. If aggressive behavior is due to the development of any mental illness, the help of a psychiatrist will be required.

Aggression does not arise out of nowhere. Often it is interpersonal conflicts that are the cause of aggression. Provocation is the most common factor in outbreaks of aggression.

Aggression can arise even from the mere thought that another person has hostile intentions, regardless of whether there was a real reason for this or not.

Social causes of aggression

Among social reasons, one of the serious reasons for aggression are observers and instigators. Many people willingly obey when they are asked to publicly punish another person, even if the commands are given by persons who are not in authority. Bystanders have a significant influence on aggression if the aggressor thinks that his actions will be approved.

Carrying a weapon can manifest itself not only as a means of protection, but also as a stimulus to aggression.
The media and the demonstration of scenes of violence in the media also serve as a reason and a kind of “call” for violence.

External environment as a cause of aggression

High air temperatures increase the likelihood of irritation and aggressive behavior.

Other environmental influences on aggression include noise and crowding. In addition, in a polluted environment, such as excessive cigarette smoke or foul odors, aggressive reactions are also increased.

Personal qualities and innate tendency to aggression

Among the psychological characteristics that can provoke aggressive behavior are:
  • fear of public disapproval;
  • irritability;
  • tendency to see hostility in others;
  • tendency to feel shame rather than guilt in many situations.
Among people prone to aggression, there are often those who are committed to various prejudices, for example, racial prejudices.

Female and male aggression

There are some differences between men and women in the expression of aggression. Women view aggression more as a way to express anger and relieve stress due to the release of aggressive energy.

Men view aggression as a certain model of behavior that they resort to in order to obtain some kind of social or material reward.

Often aggression and irritability in women manifests itself during the menstrual cycle, the so-called premenstrual syndrome. Also, the cause of attacks of aggression in women can be hormonal changes in the body, during the period before and after childbirth, menopause, or taking hormonal medications.

Attacks of aggression in men can also be associated with changes in hormonal levels, for example, with an excess of the male hormone - testosterone, or during the period of male menopause - andropause.

In addition to hormonal causes of aggression in men and women, there are a number of psychological problems, including various addictions - alcoholism, drug addiction and nicotine addiction. It is known that regular use of harmful substances has a destructive effect on the human psyche.

Domestic conflicts often begin with small things: someone accidentally touched someone with a bag, a colleague “looked at him wrongly and said the wrong thing,” a saleswoman in a store was “not too kind,” a driver cut him off on the road, a random passer-by accidentally stepped on his foot and etc. Sometimes it all ends in a verbal altercation with the supposed “offender,” but it can also lead to more serious consequences. Why the level of aggression in society is growing and what to do about it, explains psychologist Maria Merkulova.

Normal reaction

Natalya Kozhina, AiF.ru: Maria, judging by the news reports, the level of domestic aggression in Russia is growing. What is the reason?

Maria Merkulova: Aggression is one type of reaction to stressful experiences. ASR (acute stress reactions) also include: motor activity, crying, nervous tremors, stupor. Essentially, this is a normal reaction to abnormal circumstances that happen to a person. And the so-called abnormal circumstances have become more and more frequent lately. Even just ten years ago the picture was completely different. The fast pace of life does not allow us to fully rest, we sleep little, eat food that is not able to replenish our strength, stand in traffic jams for hours - naturally, the body's resources are depleted, and a person begins to explode over trifles: someone stepped on their foot during rush hour , and he is ready to start a fight.

— But not everyone has such a fast pace of life, would you agree?

— Of course, but don’t forget also about the impact of the media, which creates an information field for millions of people. Now there are a huge number of channels, they compete with each other and try to become leaders with the help of aggressive news. But don’t feed most people bread, just let them see something like that. Let’s say you have problems at work, difficulties in your personal life, and then they show some story about a family conflict, where a husband beats his wife. It seems to a person with an unstable psyche that this is normal and that this is also possible.

“The media don’t say that this is normal, they rather state the fact of what happened.

- Of course, they don’t say, but a person may well think that everyone lives exactly according to this scenario. Some violent films sometimes lead to a similar effect: if you get involved in the process while watching and worry, the stress hormone cortisol is produced. Imagine, you watched a movie, then a crime report, went out onto the landing, and there the neighbors were sorting things out. All these events fit together like a puzzle and seem natural to you. In such conditions, children grow up with a distorted idea of ​​what is good and what is bad. Look at what teenagers do today: beat up teachers, bully each other, etc. Literally 20 years ago, if such things happened, they were isolated cases, but now they are often repeated.

"Rich" and "happy"

— Does the strong stratification of incomes of the population influence increased aggressiveness?

- Of course, you constantly look at another, better life, and it seems that it is very close, you can do that too. But when a person tries once, twice, three times, but fails to achieve what he wants, he begins to get angry and show aggression.

Especially a lot of “rich” and “happy” people can be found on social networks, for example, on Instagram. Balanced, adult individuals understand that this is just a pretty picture, and it is not a fact that in real life everything is fine with a person. But teenagers and psychologically immature people do not realize this, which means they can potentially experience stress and, as a result, behave aggressively.

— Who else is at risk?

— People with an unstable nervous system. But here it is necessary to clarify that your reaction to stress is largely dictated by genes, although, of course, it can be leveled out by upbringing. Also at risk are people with chronic stress syndrome, for example, office workers. And people of any other professions who have “good” colleagues at work, unhealthy competition, conflicts. Naturally, sooner or later they will show aggression, perhaps not only towards others, but also towards themselves.

— It feels like no one is insured, or am I mistaken?

— Of course, you can’t run away from stress. But the question is not what is happening, but how we cope with a difficult situation. If you have a stable nervous system and are happy with life, you are unlikely to behave aggressively. People over the age of 35 are less susceptible to stress, because usually they have already acquired a profession, decided on what they love, their children have already grown up, have an established marriage, a circle of friends with whom they are comfortable, etc. This is a more or less settled life. They have no good reason to be aggressive towards others. But let's paint a different picture: a person wakes up every day thinking about a hated job, loans, problems with children, etc. He has a lot of reasons to “explode”, and it’s good if this state simply results in a verbal altercation with some person, but there may be a more tragic development of the situation.

thanks to parents

— What determines the level of aggression?

— There are three factors here: genetics, upbringing and environment. If a person lives in the outback, where it is absolutely normal to fight wall to wall, girls pull each other by the hair, naturally, he will behave accordingly, otherwise he will be considered a weakling, and he himself will become an object of aggression.

— Let’s say a person begins to notice increased aggressiveness in himself, and this lasts not a day, or two, but a month or more. What time period indicates that this is abnormal?

— If you have been constantly in an aggressive state for more than two months, then most likely something is going wrong and you need to contact a specialist. It is also very important to understand why you are on edge. Let’s say you’re going through a divorce, then the origins here are more or less clear, but when everything in your life seems good at first glance, and you want to quarrel with someone every day, it’s worth, again, turning to a psychologist.

— Is it necessary to suppress aggression?

— Suppression is harmful in principle, but if you do not suppress your desire, for example, to hit a woman in the subway who stepped on your foot, it will definitely not lead to anything good. Therefore, in this matter, I would recommend using common sense and simply not breaking the law. Aggression that does not harm you and others has a right to exist, just think, you will curse under your breath, the main thing is that no one gets hurt.

— And if you can’t curb aggression, where should you put it then?

- Sometimes it’s trite that you need to speak out among your surroundings, who will understand and support you, and not on the street, shocking strangers. If you know that you are aggressive, take up boxing or some martial arts.

— It always seemed to me that this was some kind of ineffective way...

— It’s a shame, look how many girls are now involved in MMA or other active sports. Believe me, this is not without reason, and it works.

Aggressive contact

— How to react to a stranger’s aggression?

— It is better not to enter into aggressive contact with strangers - you cannot know for sure what is in his pocket or bag. Perhaps there is a gun there, or the person will simply rush at you with his fists. There is no need to respond to provocation; try to either avoid communication or remain calm. If you do answer, then be aware that the aggressor may be stronger than you or be mentally ill, then there will be no demand from him.

— A typical situation: in transport some aggressive passenger pushed you, but you yourself are on edge. Is it possible to remain silent in such a situation and remain calm?

- If you want, then answer as much as you like. But it won’t just solve your problem, it won’t make it any easier. I repeat once again: aggression does not appear just like that, it is a reaction to some circumstances. When you are constantly annoyed by everything, you get irritated, you want to do something bad to someone, it means something is going wrong in your life. A harmonious person will not attack others with fists and obscenities. Aggression in response to abnormal circumstances can be explained, but if everything is fine and you want to yell at someone or hit someone, this has nothing to do with the norm.

— What helps to cope with stress and aggression?

— Often family and children can become a support. A family person is usually more stable and copes with stress easier. A healthy lifestyle, physical activity, proper nutrition, adequate rest and good sleep are also a great way. Let me remind you that men need to sleep at least 7-8 hours, women - 8-9. Lack of adequate sleep will absolutely increase your aggressiveness. Regular vacation is also needed; every three months a person must change his environment for the sake of his own health. If you don’t have the opportunity to rest for a long time, go away at least for the weekend, take a break from the usual course of life. Also, take vitamins, for example, the well-known fish oil, make up for the lack of sunlight and don’t forget about your hobbies.

Facts of violence in which harm is caused to specific individuals are called aggression. Every day a person either personally or hears from others about how they have been treated poorly.

If we talk about the moral side of this issue, then aggressive behavior is considered bad, evil, unacceptable. But why does a person allow himself to get angry and hurt himself or others?

What is Aggression?

What is aggression? There are many opinions about what aggression is. Some say that aggression is an instinctive reaction and manifestation of a person. Others argue that aggression is caused by frustration - the desire to discharge. Still others point out that aggression is a social phenomenon when a person learns it from others or is influenced by negative past experiences.

In psychology, aggression is understood as destructive behavior in which a person causes physical harm or creates psychological discomfort to other people. Psychiatry views aggression as a person’s desire to protect himself from an unpleasant and traumatic situation. Aggression is also understood as a way of self-affirmation.

Aggressive behavior is considered to be directed towards a living object. However, the psychological help website claims that smashing dishes or walls can soon develop into violence against living beings. Aggression is often equated with rage, anger or anger. However, an aggressive person does not always experience emotions. There are cold-blooded people who become aggressive under the influence of their prejudices, beliefs or views.

What reasons push a person to such behavior? Anger can be directed both at other people and at oneself. The reasons may be different, as well as the forms of manifestation of aggression. Each case is individual. Psychologists note something else: it is important to be able to cope with one’s own aggression, which manifests itself in every person. If someone needs help, they can get it. This is what a psychological help site does, a site where a person can not only read useful information, but also work through his negative aspects, which often interfere with building favorable relationships with others.

Display of aggression

Aggression manifests itself in different ways. Depending on the goal that is achieved by aggressive actions and the methods of the actions committed, aggression can be benign and malignant:

  1. Benign aggression refers to courage, courage, ambition, perseverance, and bravery.
  2. Malignant aggression refers to violence, rudeness, and cruelty.

Every living creature is aggressive. Every organism contains genes that allow it to show aggression for the sake of survival, to save itself from death. Thus, there is defensive aggression, which occurs at the moment of danger. All living beings have it. When a living organism is in danger, it becomes decisive, runs away, attacks, and defends itself.

In contrast to this aggression, there is a destructive one, which is inherent only to humans. It has no meaning or purpose. It arises only on the basis of the emotions, feelings, thoughts of a person who simply did not like something.

There is another manifestation of aggression – pseudo-aggression. It occurs in situations where a person must make every effort to achieve a goal. For example, during competition, athletes become aggressive to give themselves energy and motivation.

A special manifestation of aggression, which is inherent in all living beings, is the desire to survive. When there is not enough food, there is no intimacy, there is no protection, then the body becomes aggressive. Everything is aimed at survival, which often involves infringement of the boundaries and freedom of other living beings.

Anyone can become aggressive. Often the strong provoke the weak, who then also look for weaker individuals in order to take it out on them. There is no defense against aggression. In everyone it manifests itself as a reaction to an external stimulus. Both the one who caused it and the one who simply came into contact can become a victim of aggression.

The manifestation of aggression is an expression of dissatisfaction and dissatisfaction. It can be either open, when a person knocks on the table or constantly nags, or hidden - periodic nagging.

Types of aggression

As we consider aggression, we can distinguish its types:

  • Physical, when force is used and specific harm is caused to the body.
  • Indirect, when irritation is expressed towards another person.
  • Resistance to established laws and morals.
  • Verbal, when a person verbally shows aggression: screams, threatens, blackmails, etc.
  • Envy, hatred, resentment for unfulfilled dreams.
  • Suspicion, which manifests itself in distrust of persons when it seems that they are planning something bad.
  • Feelings of guilt that arise from the thought that a person is bad.
  • Direct – spreading gossip.
  • Directed (there is a goal) and disordered (random passers-by become victims).
  • Active or passive (“putting spokes in the wheels”).
  • Auto-aggression is hatred towards oneself.
  • Heteroaggression – anger is directed towards others: violence, threats, murder, etc.
  • Instrumental, when aggression is used as a method of achieving a goal.
  • Reactive, when it manifests itself as a reaction to some external stimulus.
  • Spontaneous, when it manifests itself without good reason. Often occurs as a consequence of internal phenomena, for example, mental illness.
  • Motivational (targeted), which is done consciously for the purpose of intentionally causing damage and pain.
  • Expressive when it manifests itself in facial expressions, gestures, and a person’s voice. His words and actions do not express aggression, but his body position and tone of voice indicate otherwise.

It's human nature to get angry. And the most important question that worries everyone who has become a victim of someone else’s aggression is why they yelled at him, beat him up, etc.? Everyone is concerned about the reasons for aggressive behavior, especially if the aggressor has not explained anything. And how different aggression can be has already been discussed.

Causes of aggression

There are many reasons for aggressive behavior. Aggression can be different and happens in different situations, so you often need to look at the complex of everything that happens in order to understand the motives of a person’s actions.

  1. Substance abuse (alcohol, drugs, etc.). Under the influence of drugs, a person cannot adequately respond to a specific situation.
  2. Personal problems that are associated with dissatisfaction in personal relationships, intimacy, loneliness, etc. Any mention of this problem causes a negative reaction.
  3. Mental traumas of childhood. Developed neurosis against the background of dysfunctional relationships with parents.
  4. Authoritarian and strict education that develops internal aggression.
  5. Watching films and programs where the topic of violence is actively discussed.
  6. Inadequate rest, overwork.

Aggression may be a symptom of a serious illness that is often associated with damage to the brain:

  • Schizophrenia.
  • Encephalitis.
  • Neurasthenia.
  • Meningitis.
  • Epileptoid psychopathy, etc.

Public influence should not be excluded. Religious movements, propaganda, racial hatred, morality, images of politicians or strong personalities who are aggressive develop a similar quality in observers.

Often people who cause harm refer to a bad mood or even a mental disorder. In fact, only 12% of all aggressive people are mentally ill. Other individuals show their negative emotions as a result of an incorrect reaction to what is happening, as well as a lack of self-control.

Aggression is noted as a person’s dissatisfaction with life in general or a specific case in particular. Accordingly, the main reason is dissatisfaction, which a person does not eliminate through favorable actions.

Verbal aggression

Almost everyone has encountered this form of aggression. Verbal aggression is the most common and obvious. Firstly, the tone of the speaker’s voice changes: he starts shouting, raises his voice, and makes it ruder. Secondly, the context of what is being said changes.

Psychologists have noted many forms of verbal aggression. In everyday life, a person encounters the following manifestations:

  1. Insults, threats, blackmail.
  2. Slander, spreading gossip.
  3. Silence in response to a person’s questions, refusal to communicate, ignoring cues.
  4. Refusing to defend another person who is being criticized.

The question still remains whether silence is a way of aggression. There is no clear answer here. It all depends on the reasons for the silence of the person who performs this action. If silence occurs with accompanying aggressive emotions, anger, and reluctance to speak because it can be rude, then we are talking about verbal aggression of a passive nature. However, if a person is silent because he did not hear or is not interested in the topic of the conversation, therefore he wants to transfer it to another topic, remains calm and in a friendly mood, then there is no question of any aggression.

Due to the social system and morality, which punishes anyone who shows physical aggression, people are forced to use the only way to express it - words. Open aggression is expressed in specific threats, insults and humiliation of the personality of another. Hidden aggression manifests itself through persecution and pressure on a person, for example, by spreading gossip. Although these types of verbal aggression are unacceptable, a person is not deprived of freedom for them. That's why people continue to use this form as a way of communicating with those with whom they are dissatisfied.

Speech aggression

Let us dwell directly on the verbal form of manifestation of aggression, which is the most common in society. Speech aggression manifests itself in curses, negative assessments (criticism), offensive words, obscene speech, mocking intonation, crude irony, indecent allusions, and a raised voice.

What the aggressor does causes irritation and indignation. Aggression of both the first and second interlocutor arises on the basis of negative emotions that arise immediately or after some time. Some people immediately say what outrages them, others only after a while begin to show their aggression in various ways towards those who humiliated or insulted them.

Often, verbal aggression is a consequence of a person’s hostility towards a certain group of people. For example, low social status can provoke an individual’s hostile attitude towards those with whom he communicates. Such a confrontation is possible both in an ascending hierarchy and in a descending one. For example, hidden aggression is often manifested by subordinates towards the boss and by the boss towards subordinates. Subordinates often feel jealous of the leadership's high position, as well as its commanding tone. A boss may hate his subordinates because he considers them stupid, weak, inferior creatures.

Rarely, the causes of speech aggression are upbringing, mental characteristics, or a breakdown.

Undoubtedly, society is considering the issue of not only extinguishing negative emotions when they arise, but also preventing conflicts with people who show anger. It should be understood that sometimes aggression is acceptable because it helps achieve certain goals, such as suppressing the enemy. However, this method should not be used as a universal one.

Approaches to aggression

Scientists from various fields of science are considering approaches to aggression. For each representative it means something different. The normative approach perceives aggression as destructive behavior that does not correspond to the moral and ethical standards of society. The criminal approach also considers aggression as an act of unlawful behavior that is aimed at causing physical and moral harm to a living object.

  • The depth psychological approach perceives aggressive behavior as instinctive, inherent in all living beings.
  • The goal-directed approach perceives aggression as a goal-directed action. From the point of view of achieving goals, evolution, adaptation, appropriation of important resources, dominance.
  • Schwab and Koeroglow view aggressive behavior as a person’s desire to establish the integrity of his life. When it is violated, a person becomes aggressive.
  • Kaufma views aggression as a way of acquiring resources necessary for life, which is dictated by the natural need for survival.
  • Erich Fromm viewed aggressive behavior as a desire to dominate and dominate living beings.
  • Wilson characterized the aggressive nature of a person as the desire to eliminate the actions of another subject who, by his actions, infringes on his freedom or genetic survival.
  • Matsumoto noted aggression as an act that causes pain and physical or mental harm to another individual.
  • Shcherbina characterized verbal aggression as a verbal manifestation of feelings, intentions and desires towards another person.
  • Cognitive theory considers aggression as a way of learning to contact a person with external factors.
  • Other theories combine the above concepts to understand the nature of aggressive behavior.

Forms of aggression

Erich Fromm identified the following forms of aggression:

  • Reactive. When a person realizes that his freedom, life, dignity or property is in danger, he becomes aggressive. Here he can defend himself, take revenge, be jealous, envy, be disappointed, etc.
  • Archaic bloodlust.
  • Gaming. Sometimes a person just wants to show his dexterity and skills. It is at this moment that he can resort to malicious jokes, mockery, and sarcasm. There is no hatred or anger here. A person is simply playing at something that may irritate his interlocutor.
  • Compensatory (malignant). It is a manifestation of destructiveness, violence, cruelty, which helps a person make his life complete, not boring, and fulfilling.

A person who becomes aggressive has the following characteristics:

  1. Sensitivity, vulnerability, acute experience of discomfort.
  2. Impulsiveness.
  3. Absent-mindedness, which leads to emotional aggressiveness, and thoughtfulness, which provokes instrumental aggressiveness.
  4. Hostile interpretation of what is happening.

A person is not able to completely get rid of his aggression, because sometimes it is useful and necessary. It is here that he allows himself to show his nature. Only a person who knows how to control his emotions (without suppressing them) is able to live fully. Aggression only rarely becomes constructive compared to those episodes when it is used in full force.

Teenage aggression

Quite often, psychologists note aggression in childhood. It becomes very bright during adolescence. It is this stage that becomes the most emotional. Teenage aggression can manifest itself towards anyone: peers, parents, animals, younger children. A common cause of aggression is self-affirmation. Showing strength in an aggressive manner seems to be a sign of greatness and power.

Adolescent aggression is a deliberate action aimed at causing harm. Remaining frequent are cases where three parties are involved:

  1. The aggressor is a teenager himself.
  2. The victim is the person at whom the teenager’s aggression is directed.
  3. Spectators are people who can become bystanders or provocateurs that cause aggression in a teenager. They do not participate in the process of manifestation of aggression, but only observe what the aggressor and his victim do.

Teenagers of different genders show aggression in the following ways:

  • The boys tease, trip, fight, and kick.
  • Girls boycott, gossip, and get offended.

The location and age of the aggressor does not matter, since this emotion manifests itself at any time from an early age.

Psychologists explain teenage aggression by the changes that occur during puberty. A former child who has not yet become an adult is afraid of the future, is not ready for responsibility and independence, and does not know how to control his emotional experiences. Relationships with parents, as well as the influence of the media, play a significant role here.

Here are the following types of aggressive teenagers:

  1. Hyperactive, who grew up in a family where everything was allowed to him.
  2. Touchy, characterized by vulnerability and irritability.
  3. Oppositional defiant, who demonstratively opposes people whom he does not consider his authority.
  4. Aggressive-fearful, in which fears and suspicion are manifested.
  5. Aggressively insensitive, who does not have sympathy or empathy.

Male aggression

Men are often the benchmarks of aggression. It seems that women should not be as aggressive as men. However, this feeling is common to everyone. Male aggression often manifests itself in open form. At the same time, the stronger sex does not experience feelings of guilt and anxiety. For them, this emotion is a kind of companion that helps them achieve goals and form a special model of behavior.

Scientists have put forward a theory that male aggression is a genetic factor. In all centuries, men had to conquer territories and lands, wage wars, protect their families, etc. At the same time, representatives of the weaker sex note this quality, which manifests itself in dominance and leadership, as attractive to them.

A modern man has many reasons why aggression manifests itself in him:

  • Dissatisfaction with one's social and financial situation.
  • Lack of culture of behavior.
  • Lack of self-confidence.
  • Lack of other forms of manifestation of one’s independence and strength.

In the current situation, when a man is required to be financially wealthy and successful, while there are practically no opportunities to achieve these statuses, the stronger sex has a high level of anxiety. Every time society reminds a man in various ways of how untenable he is. This is often reinforced by an unsettled personal life or lack of sexual relationships with women.

Men are trained to keep their experiences to themselves. However, aggression comes out, which is a consequence of unsettled life. It is difficult for a man to use all his capabilities in a world where he should be cultured and friendly, since anger and rage are often punished.

Women's aggression

Aggression is often associated with masculine behavior. However, women are also prone to dissatisfaction, which simply manifests itself in slightly different forms. Being a weaker creature than a man, a woman tries to express her aggression a little softly. If the victim seems strong or equal in strength, then the woman's aggression is moderate. If we are talking about a child at whom aggression is directed, then the woman may not restrain herself.

Being a more emotional and social creature, a woman is prone to displaying soft or hidden aggression. Women become more aggressive in old age. Psychologists associate this with dementia and negative character deterioration. At the same time, a woman’s satisfaction with her own life remains important. If she is dissatisfied, unhappy, then her internal tension increases.

Often a woman’s aggressiveness is associated with internal tension and emotional outbursts. A woman, no less than a man, is subject to various restrictions and obligations. She must start a family and give birth to children, always be beautiful and kind. If a woman does not have good reasons for kindness, a man for starting a family and having children, or physiological data for achieving beauty, this significantly oppresses her.

The cause of female aggression is often:

  • Hormonal imbalance.
  • Mental disorders.
  • Childhood traumas, hostility towards mother.
  • Negative experiences with contacts with the opposite sex.

A woman is made dependent on a man from childhood. She must be “married.” And when relationships with the opposite sex do not work out, which is common in modern society, this causes internal tension and dissatisfaction.

Aggression in older people

The most unpleasant and sometimes incomprehensible phenomenon is aggression in older people. Children are raised to “respect their elders” because they are smarter and wiser. Their knowledge helps the world become a better place. However, older people are practically no different from their younger counterparts. Aggression by older people becomes a weak quality that does not inspire respect.

The reason for the aggressiveness of older people is a change in life as a result of social degradation. When a person retires, he loses his previous activity. Here memory decreases, health deteriorates, and the meaning of life is lost. An elderly person feels forgotten, unwanted, lonely. If this is reinforced by a poor existence and lack of interests and hobbies, then the elderly person either becomes depressed or becomes aggressive.

We can call aggression by older people a way of communicating with others, a method of attracting attention to themselves. Here are the following forms of aggression:

  1. Grumpiness.
  2. Irritability.
  3. Opposition to everything new.
  4. Protest attitude.
  5. Groundless accusations and insults.
  6. High propensity for conflicts.

The main problem of older people is loneliness, especially after the death of one of the spouses. If children do not pay much attention to the elderly person, then he feels acute loneliness.

Degeneration or infection of brain cells also affects behavior changes at any age. Since these phenomena mostly occur in old age, doctors first rule out brain diseases as the cause of aggression.

Husband's aggression

In love relationships, the most discussed topic is the aggressiveness of husbands. Because women express their despotism differently, flamboyant displays of male aggression become commonplace. The causes of conflicts and quarrels in the family are:

  1. Unequal distribution of responsibilities.
  2. Dissatisfaction with intimate relationships.
  3. Different understandings of the rights and responsibilities of spouses.
  4. Not meeting your needs in relationships.
  5. Unequal contribution of both parties to the relationship.
  6. Lack of significance and value of a person as a partner.
  7. Financial difficulties.
  8. Inability to solve all emerging problems, their accumulation and periodic disputes because of them.

Many problems can cause aggression in a husband, but the most important are social status, financial wealth and sexual satisfaction. If a man is not satisfied in all plans, then he habitually looks for someone to blame - his wife. She is not sexy enough to want, does not inspire him to make money, does not become his support, etc.

A dissatisfied and insecure man begins to find fault, quarrel, point, and command a woman. In this way he tries to normalize his inferior life. If we analyze the situation, it turns out that aggression in husbands arises on the basis of their complexes and inadequacy, and not because of their wives.

The mistake women with aggressive husbands make is that they try to improve the relationship. It is the husbands who must correct the situation, not the women. Here wives make the following mistakes:

  • They talk about their hopes and fears, which further convinces their husbands that they are weak.
  • They share their plans, which gives their husbands another reason to criticize them.
  • They share their successes, expecting their husbands to rejoice at them.
  • They try to find common topics for conversation, but are faced with silence and coldness.

Treatment of aggression

The treatment of aggression does not mean medicinal elimination of the problem, but psychological one. Only in rare cases are tranquilizers and antidepressants used, which can calm the nervous system. However, a person will never completely get rid of aggressive behavior. Therefore, the treatment of aggression means developing skills to control it and understand the current situation.

If aggression is directed at you, you must understand that you are not obliged to tolerate attacks. Even if we are talking about your husband/wife or children, you still remain a person who has the right to be treated with kindness and care. The situation becomes especially painful when it comes to aggressive behavior of parents towards children. This is a situation in which the victim is almost never able to resist the pressure.

No one is obliged to endure other people's attacks. Therefore, if you become the object of someone’s aggression, you can safely fight back by any means. If you yourself are an aggressor, then this problem is yours personally. Here it is necessary to carry out exercises to eliminate one’s own aggressiveness.

Firstly, the causes of the aggression should be recognized. Nothing happens for nothing. Even mentally ill people have reasons to be aggressive. What moment was the trigger that made you feel angry? After realizing the cause of your negative emotions, you should take steps to change your attitude towards the situation.

The second point is that the reason must be devalued or eliminated. If you need to change your personal attitude towards a situation, then you should do it; If you need to solve a problem (for example, eliminate dissatisfaction), then you should make an effort and be patient.

You should not fight your own aggression, but understand the reasons for its occurrence, since eliminating these reasons allows you to cope with any negative emotions.

Forecast

The result of any emotion is a certain event that becomes decisive. Anything can be a predictor of the consequences of aggression:

  1. Losing connections with good people.
  2. Divorce or separation from a loved one.
  3. Dismissal from work.
  4. Unsettled life.
  5. Lack of support from important people.
  6. Lack of understanding.
  7. Loneliness, etc.

In some cases, the question even arises about the life expectancy of the person who enters into conflict. When physical violence occurs in the family or in the company of hooligans, it can result in death.

If a person does not try to control his aggressive impulses, he will face various negative consequences. His environment will consist only of people who should not be trusted. Only an aggressive person can be close to the same aggressor.

The consequences of controlling one's own aggression can be successful. Firstly, a person will not spoil relationships with those who are dear to him. I really want to throw out my emotions and show my character. However, if you understand what the consequences may be, it is better to prevent an undesirable outcome.

Secondly, a person can channel aggression into a constructive direction. You cannot get rid of this emotion, but you can subjugate it. For example, aggression is good when a person is dissatisfied with an unachieved goal. In this case, he wants to make every effort to realize his plans.

If a person cannot cope with his aggression on his own, then he should consult a psychologist. He will help you find the right answers to your questions, as well as develop a behavior strategy that will help you pacify aggression and take the right actions in the right situations.