Courage is a positive quality of a person, expressed in determination when performing actions associated with risk and danger. It is she who allows you to overcome fear and commit a desperate act. But not every person will find the strength and courage to overcome themselves and overcome their phobias. Many writers talk about how people cultivate courage.
So, in the story of M.A. Sholokhov’s “The Fate of Man” and the epic novel by L.N. Tolstoy's "War and Peace" the authors reveal a very important, in my opinion, problem of human moral choice.
In his work “The Fate of Man” M.A. Sholokhov tells the story of the fate of an ordinary soldier, Andrei Sokolov, who was forced to leave his home and go to the front. But the war spares no one. she tests him with fear and death, in the hope of breaking his fighting spirit.
Only a feeling of love for loved ones, country and life in general helps him overcome the harsh trials that befell him. In captivity, Andrei Sokolov shows incredible courage, refusing to obey the invaders. He does not give in to weakness, but maintains his composure, which impresses the German commandant, who sees him as a worthy opponent. Death looked him in the eye more than once, but he managed to remain a devoted person who did not lose his sense of kindness and mercy. Despite all the horrors that he had to endure, Andrei Sokolov remains faithful to his duty, to his Fatherland. The war could not break his character; it wounded, but did not kill his living soul. By maintaining his composure, Andrei Sokolov was able to cultivate courage without losing his humanity.
In the epic novel L.N. Tolstoy's "War and Peace" the author talks about Artillery Staff Captain Tushin, who, being a timid person, acquires remarkable determination in battle. In a dangerous moment, he decides to take command and responsibility for the soldiers. During the Battle of Shengraben, Tushin does not violate the order and remains on the battlefield with his subordinates. He knew that he could have died in battle, but the fear of death did not frighten him. Tushin cared not only about the lives of other soldiers, but also about the fate of his country. Responsibility for his comrades and his homeland helped him maintain steadfastness and courage during the battle.
M. Twain once said that courage is resistance to fear, not its absence. It's hard to disagree with this idea. As the experience of fiction shows, it is not the one who does not feel fear who is brave, but the one who overcomes his fear, curbs it and becomes stronger. This is why it is so important to cultivate courage.
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Bravery, courage, readiness to calmly accept and overcome difficulties - all these qualities are rightly admired by most children. How to cultivate these qualities in a child so that he is not afraid of hooligans in the yard, or angry dogs, or other possible dangers?
Fear is natural, but...
Fear is a completely normal feeling. It is the body’s natural defense mechanism against the emergence of potentially dangerous situations that can cause some damage to human health and life. It's dark outside - what if there are predators lurking there? There's a spider crawling nearby - could it bite? What these situations have in common is that fear motivates us to look for a way out, a solution to such a crisis. You can go around a dark alley along the illuminated road, brushing the spider aside. This is the great significance of fear. But people's reactions vary: fear of danger forces us to change behavior in order to avoid possible risks. And it’s completely different: if fear paralyzes a person, deprives him of his will, and turns into cowardice. And it is precisely these manifestations in the child’s character that need to be eradicated, courage, willpower and self-confidence must be instilled so that the baby can grow up to be a healthy, psychologically strong person. Then he will calmly perceive the challenges of the world around him - and instead of panic, look for a way out of a difficult situation.
You should not put pressure on a child if you see that he is sincerely afraid of something. You, the adult, know that he won’t bite because he walks on a leash and wears a muzzle. Are you aware that monsters under the bed only live in horror films? And you understand that meeting new children can bring a lot of positive emotions. But the baby is still afraid, all this is new, unknown, unusual for him - and therefore something that can be fraught with a certain danger. And if you decide to laugh at him, you will not push him to resolve his internal conflict. You shouldn’t think that hearing “coward, what are you afraid of”, the child will say “no, I’m not like that, I’m not afraid, I can handle it!” Of course, he can say something just to justify himself, but this will not change his feelings. And instead of really fighting fear, he will simply conclude: being afraid is shameful. And if so, I will continue to be afraid, but secretly (especially typical for). There is a similar reaction to comparing the baby with other children. “Look, your friend is not afraid of vaccinations, what about you?”, “What a smart girl on the playground: she was not afraid to climb on without her mother’s help - not like you...” - these phrases only aggravate the problem. After all, they make the baby feel bad, which can lead to the development of complexes and even neuroses.
Support and teach independence
The best policy in teaching courage is to help overcome childhood fears. First, tell your child everything described above: fear is a normal feeling that all people experience. And you should not be ashamed, but fight it. You can show your baby how his body helps him with this! When a person is afraid, his heart beat and breathing increase to speed up the movement of blood and oxygen to the organs. And thanks to this, the brain is more actively looking for ways out of the crisis, and the muscles are gathering strength in order to cope with the task set by the brain as quickly as possible: run, speed up, . Of course, physiology is difficult for a 2-3 year old child to understand. But he will remember the main thing: his body will come to his aid if he learns to control his fear - not to panic and freeze in the face of danger, but to find the willpower to eliminate it. Although, of course, there is little talk. And the most important thing you can do is to develop your child’s self-confidence. Find feasible tasks in other areas, praise him for significant achievements, develop his erudition through educational books or films, send him to some sports and creative section, play out various conflict situations in a quiet home environment in roles, encourage meeting other people - the more he will have accumulated successful experience in communicating with the outside world, the calmer he will perceive those moments that can cause fear.
A separate issue is the atmosphere in the family. Psychologists will confirm: children who observe a distortion in their environment are most often afraid. Moreover, the distortion can be different. Thus, it is hardly worth explaining how conflicts and quarrels between family members affect the child. Constantly observing screams and scandals is bad for the baby’s development: his anxiety increases, he becomes restless and fearful. Therefore, try to maintain a normal degree of relationships in the family and a single direction of education - and resolve difficult situations without a little witness... But another situation is no less dangerous: if there are no conflicts, and the child is given increased attention. Another kid accidentally pushed him in the yard, and you immediately get into a squabble with his parents, protecting the child? Do you immediately pull him back the first time you try to reach out to an outdoor cat, emphasizing that you might pick up fleas or that she will scratch you? This approach to education is not the best. After all, this is a classic one, where a child is protected so much that he either withdraws into himself and begins to be afraid of everything in the world (he hasn’t learned to solve problems without mom or dad), or he starts a rebellion and stops obeying even common sense requirements (and therefore about safety there is no question). Therefore, you are obliged to gradually, as he grows up, provide him with a certain degree of freedom, allow him to make mistakes and endure!
Help, protect, tell us about yourself
Try to maintain balance everywhere. On the one hand, your child must learn to cope with fears and be able to subjugate them. But, on the other hand, he should also feel: his parents are nearby and will always help if necessary. Remember: young children have minimal life experience! And that’s why they need support from you; explain why they shouldn’t be afraid. And sometimes words are not enough - and a decisive reaction on your part is needed. If you sit with your child until he falls asleep after a nightmare, if you stand up for him in a serious conflict with another child, if you hold him when he, overcoming his fear of heights, climbs a hill, he will understand the main thing: his parents protect him, if this really necessary. This means that he will be afraid less and less often.
Your behavior is generally one of the key factors in learning courage. After all, children look to their parents as role models. If a mother screams at the sight of a mouse, why would you expect anything different from a little girl? If dad cannot calmly and with dignity respond to a rude person on the street, falling into a stupor, then how can a son learn to cope with such situations? Remember: the child is watching you! Children under 2-3 years old do not distinguish between good and bad. For them, everything their parents do is an example that should be copied. Just don't overdo it - don't try to create the image of a fearless person. Did we say that fear is natural? Bring this to your child by personal example. Tell us how scared you were in this or that situation (no matter whether the child witnessed it or it happened a long time ago) and how you came out of it, overcoming your fear and subordinating it to your willpower. Explain that you were afraid of a specific danger, but figured out how to minimize the risk by insuring yourself against troubles - and now you can treat the incident with humor that you were afraid of it in vain. Such experience (as, by the way, examples from fairy tales and cartoons with a detailed analysis of their plot) is extremely useful for a child. If comparison with children can make one feel complex, then comparison with parents or favorite characters motivates them - the child always wants to be like them!
P.S. Be sure to teach your child to sense the boundaries of what is acceptable! Still, fear keeps us from taking unnecessary risks. And sometimes the smartest decision is to refuse a potentially dangerous development of the situation. Confidence in one’s abilities is good, but it should not be confused with self-confidence, because a person who overly believes in one’s abilities exposes himself and others to unjustified risks.
Tell us, how do you teach your child to be brave and courageous in dangerous, stressful situations?
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This matters a lot more than you probably realize.
If a teacher could look into your soul and heart and determine the depth of your aspirations, he could predict with almost complete certainty how quickly you will achieve success. If your aspirations are sluggish and weak, your achievements will take on the same character. But if you pursue your goal tenaciously, with the energy of a bulldog chasing a cat, then nothing in our galaxy can stop you.
Therefore, it is necessary to engage in self-education with great enthusiasm. Remember its benefits. Think about what it means to you to develop greater self-confidence and the ability to speak more persuasively in front of an audience. Think about what this could and should mean in terms of dollars and cents. Think about what it could mean for you socially, what friends you could make, think about the increase in your personal influence, about the possibility of you being able to occupy leadership positions. And it will get you into leadership positions faster than almost any other activity you can think of.
“No other ability,” said Chauncey M. Depew, “that a man can possess, will enable him to so quickly make a career and achieve recognition as the ability to speak well.”
Philip Armor said, when he had already made millions: “I would rather be a famous speaker than a famous capitalist.”
This is an achievement that almost every educated person strives for. After the death of Andrew Carnegie, a life plan was found in his papers, drawn up when he was thirty-three years old. At that time, he believed that within two years he would be able to earn fifty thousand dollars a year in income. Therefore, he intended to retire at the age of thirty-five, enter Oxford University, receive a systematic education and “pay special attention to public speaking.”
Think about the satisfaction, the joy this new ability will give you. The author of these lines has traveled much of the globe and acquired a wide and varied experience, but he can name few things that give satisfaction comparable to that which a man gets from speaking before an audience and inducing people to think as he thinks. This will give you a feeling of strength, a feeling of power. This will make you proud of your achievements. In this way, you will get ahead of other people and rise above them. There is a kind of magic in this, something unforgettably exciting. “Two minutes before the start of the speech,” one speaker admitted, “I am ready to allow myself to be flogged rather than speak, but two minutes before the end of the speech I am ready to allow myself to be shot rather than be silent.”
With any extra effort, some people become discouraged and leave the task unfinished, and therefore you must constantly think about what the acquisition of this art will give you; your desire for it must be ardent, white-hot. You must take up your studies with enthusiasm, and this will lead you to victory. Set aside one evening a week to read this book. In short, make it as easy as possible for yourself to move forward and make it difficult for yourself to retreat.
When Julius Caesar crossed the English Channel from Gaul and landed his legions in what is now England, what did he do to ensure the success of his troops? A very sensible thing: he ordered his soldiers to stop on the chalk cliffs of Dover; looking down from a height of two hundred feet above the sea, they saw red tongues of flame consuming all the ships in which they had arrived. They were in an enemy country, the last link with the continent had disappeared, the last means of retreat had been burned, and there was only one thing left for them to do: advance and win. That's exactly what they did.
Such was the spirit of the immortal Caesar. Why don't you embrace the same spirit in this war to eliminate ridiculous stage fright?
If a person has not thought about it, has not planned his speech in advance and does not know what he will say, he cannot feel confident in front of his audience. He will resemble a blind man leading another blind man. In this case, our speaker must inevitably be embarrassed, must feel guilty, must be ashamed of his negligence.
“I was elected to my state legislature in the fall of 1881,” writes Teddy Roosevelt in his Autobiography, “and found myself the youngest member of that body. As is the case with all young and inexperienced people, I found it extremely difficult to learn speak.
I benefited greatly from the advice of an old, experienced countryman, who quoted the Duke of Wellington, who himself, no doubt, quoted someone else's words. This advice is: "Only speak if you have something to say and you know it well. Speak up and sit down."
This “old, experienced fellow countryman” should have recommended to Roosevelt another way to overcome his anxiety. He should have added: “It will be easier for you to get rid of your embarrassment if you can do something in front of an audience, such as pick something up, write something on the board, point out a point on a map, move a table, "open a window, move some books or papers from place to place. Any physical action that has a specific purpose can help you feel more at ease."
True, it is not always easy to find a reason for such actions, but here is some advice. Use it if you can, but only use it the first few times; baby doesn't cling to chairs after he's learned to walk.
One of the most famous psychologists America has produced, Professor William James, wrote:
“Action seems to follow feeling, but in fact action and feeling are combined: by controlling action, which is under the more direct control of the will, we can indirectly control feeling, which is not under that control.
So, an excellent conscious way to gain cheerfulness, if your true cheerfulness has been lost, is to sit cheerfully, act and speak as if you were already imbued with cheerfulness. If this behavior does not make you feel cheerful, then nothing else will help you in this case.
Therefore, to feel courageous, act as if you were really courageous, exert all your will for this purpose, and the attack of fear will, in all likelihood, be replaced by a surge of courage."
Take Professor James' advice. To develop courage in front of an audience, act as if you already have that courage. It goes without saying that if you are not prepared, then no amount of action will help. But if you know what you're going to talk about, stand up and take a deep breath.
Breathe deeply for thirty seconds before you face the audience. The increased flow of oxygen will invigorate you and give you courage. The famous tenor Jean de Reschke said that if you have such a breath, then you “can sit on it” and the excitement will disappear.
At all times, in all countries, people have always admired courage, so no matter how hard your heart beats, step forward boldly, stand calmly and carry yourself as if you are pleased.
Stand up straight to your full height, look straight into the eyes of your listeners and start speaking as confidently as if they all owe you money. Imagine this to be the case. Imagine that they are here to ask you to postpone the payment deadline. This will give a psychological effect that is beneficial for you.
There is no need to nervously button and unbutton buttons on your jacket, finger beads in your hands, or make fussy movements with your hands.
If you can't stop yourself from making nervous movements, hold your hands behind your back and move your fingers without anyone seeing, or wiggle your toes.
As a general rule, it's not good for a speaker to hide behind furniture, but during your first speeches, if you stand behind a table or chair and hold on tightly to it or clutch a coin in your hand, it may give you a little courage.
How did Teddy Roosevelt develop his characteristic courage and self-control? Was he naturally endowed with a bold, daring spirit?
Not at all. “Since I was quite sickly and clumsy as a child,” he admits in his “Autobiography,” “in my youth I was at first nervous and did not believe in my prowess. I had to persistently and painfully exercise not only my body, but also my soul and spirit ".
Luckily, he told us how he achieved this transformation.
“As a child,” he writes, “I was strongly impressed by an episode from one of Marryat’s books. There, the captain of a small English warship explains to the hero how to become fearless. He says that at first almost every person experiences fear when entering into battle, but one must so to control oneself as to carry oneself as if there was nothing to be afraid of. After a while the goal is achieved, and a person actually becomes fearless only because he carries himself fearlessly (I am telling this in my own words, and not in Marryat’s ).
I began to follow this theory. In the beginning, I was afraid of a number of things, from grizzly bears to skittish horses to cutthroats. But I acted as if I was not afraid, and gradually I really stopped being afraid.
Most people can do the same if they want."
And you, if you want, can achieve the same. “In war,” said Marshal Foch, “the best way of defense is to attack.” So go on the offensive against your fears! Meet them halfway, fight them, defeat them with courage at every opportunity!
Imagine you are a messenger who must deliver a message. We do not pay special attention to the messenger; we are interested in the contents of the telegram. It's all in the message. Focus your attention on it. Keep it in your heart. Know him like the back of your hand. Believe in him. And then speak with conviction and determination.
Do this, and the chances are ten to one that you will soon become master of the situation and control yourself.
The last thing we need to mention here is by far the most important. Even if you forget everything you've read so far, remember this: The first (and last) sure-fire way to build confidence in speaking is to talk as much as possible. In essence, it all ultimately comes down to one basic point - you have to practice, practice, practice. This is a sine qua non
“Any beginner,” warns Roosevelt, “may be subject to an attack of “buck fever.” This is a state of extreme nervous excitement, which has nothing to do with timidity. It can occur in someone who has to speak in front of a large audience for the first time, as well as in someone who sees a deer for the first time on a hunt or participates in a battle. A person needs not courage, but self-control, composure. And this can only be acquired through constant practice.
He must, through constant self-control, learn to completely control his nerves. This is largely a matter of habit, constant effort and constant exercise of willpower. If a person has good inclinations, he will become stronger and stronger with every manifestation of this willpower."
Do you want to get rid of stage fright? Let's see what causes it.
“Fear is born of ignorance and uncertainty,” writes Professor Robinson in his book The Making of the Mind. In other words, fear is a consequence of a lack of self-confidence.
What causes this last one? It represents the consequence of your ignorance of what you can actually do. And this ignorance, in turn, is caused by a lack of experience. When you have a baggage of successful experience behind you, your fears will disappear; they will melt away like night fog under the rays of the July sun.
One thing is certain: to learn to swim, you need to throw yourself into the water. Everyone agrees with this. You've been reading this book long enough. Why don't you now put it aside and get down to practical work?
Choose a topic, preferably one in which you have some knowledge, and prepare a three-minute speech.
Rehearse this speech in private many times. Then, if possible, perform in front of a group of people for whom it is intended, or in front of a group of friends, giving it your best shot.
1. Thousands of course participants have written to the author of this book, explaining why they want to study public speaking and what they expect to achieve as a result. The main reason given by almost everyone is the following: they want to get rid of anxiety, learn to think while standing in front of an audience, and speak confidently and naturally in front of an audience of any size.
2. The ability to do all this is not difficult to acquire. This is not a talent bestowed by providence only on individual outstanding individuals. It is something like the skill of playing poker: any man, any woman - that is, any person - can develop his hidden abilities if he has a strong enough desire.
3. Many experienced speakers think and speak better in front of an audience than in conversation with an individual. The presence of a larger number of listeners turns out to be an incentive for them and generates inspiration.
If you carefully follow the advice contained in this book, the time will come when you will acquire the same ability and will be happy to think about your upcoming public speaking.
4. Don't think that your case is exceptional. Many people who later became famous speakers suffered from shyness at the beginning of their careers and were almost paralyzed by fear of an audience. This was the case with Brian, Jean Jaurès, Lloyd George, Charles Stewart Parnell, John Bright, Disraeli, Sheridan and many, many others.
5. No matter how often you speak, you may always feel that embarrassment right before you start speaking, but within a few seconds of speaking, it completely disappears.
6. To get the most out of this book, and to get it as quickly as possible, you need to follow these four rules: a) Begin your speech with a strong and persistent desire to achieve the goal.
Remember all the benefits that the effort you put into learning will bring you. Create an uplift in yourself. Think about what this can do for you financially, socially, and in terms of increasing your influence and leadership positions. Remember that the speed at which you achieve your success will depend on the strength of your desire for your goal. b) Prepare for the performance. You will feel insecure if you do not know well what you are about to talk about. c) Show confidence. “To feel courageous,” recommends Professor William James, “act as if you were really courageous, exert all your will for this purpose, and the attack of fear will, in all likelihood, be replaced by a surge of courage.” Teddy Roosevelt admitted that it was in this way that he overcame his fear of grizzly bears, restive horses and thugs. You can overcome your stage fright using this psychological method. d) Practice. This is the most important thing to achieve your goal. Fear is a result of uncertainty, uncertainty is caused by not knowing what you are capable of, and this ignorance is the result of a lack of experience.
Therefore, create a baggage of successful experience for yourself, and your fears will disappear.
What is courage? Many people are looking for the answer to this question. The meaning of the word courage is defined as brave, self-confident. Courage and courage are essential components of a life that brings maximum satisfaction. In the minds of many people, a brave person is one who is not afraid of anything. Actually this is not true. It is impossible to never experience fear or give in to difficulties. A brave person is distinguished not by his upbringing, but by his special attitude to life. Who is a brave man?
Confidence
Trust in yourself and others is a prerequisite for feeling truly happy. Striving to build good relationships with others helps cultivate courage. When a person knows why he performs certain actions, he really grows in his own eyes.
How to become brave? You need to learn to trust. First of all, you need to accept your own actions and actions. Cultivating determination is impossible without meaningful trust in the steps taken. A person must know why he acts, for what purpose. The benefit of such an understanding is undeniable: you can better comprehend, understand and accept the changes that are taking place. You can cultivate courage by opening your soul towards loved ones, and for this you just need to sincerely care about them.
Taking responsibility
How to become bolder and more confident in yourself? What can help in developing courage? You must learn to take responsibility. Understanding that events that occur are always the result of a person’s choice helps to reach a completely different level of perception of reality. When thinking about how to develop courage, you should accept circumstances as inevitable and try to build something on their basis. Cultivating courage always begins with recognizing what needs to change in life.
Feeling of self-worth
Self-esteem is an indispensable attribute of cultivating courage. Confidence doesn’t come overnight; you can’t limit yourself to taking a magic pill. Only perseverance and appropriate actions will help cultivate courage. Becoming a courageous person means cultivating a sense of self-worth. When people do not accept and respect themselves, they cannot boast of special courage. Developing determination has undeniable benefits. It is impossible to be yourself without accepting your own shortcomings. It happens that people do not know how to muster the courage to utter some important and meaningful words. A developed sense of self-esteem will help here.
Working with self-esteem
The attitude towards oneself affects the level of achievements, affects everything that a person has or strives to achieve in life. Low self-esteem interferes with an adequate perception of life. Such a person will always refuse everything, endure ridicule and insults. When thinking about how to cultivate determination in yourself, you need to show persistence. It is impossible to take a magic pill once and wake up a happy person the next morning. You must strive to work on yourself so that your self-esteem returns to normal and becomes adequate.
Many words of praise have already been said about courage. Self-confidence will come when enough inner strength has accumulated in a person’s heart. The meaning of the word courage goes back to learning to accept the obvious and act in unusual circumstances. The better a person thinks about himself, the greater results he will be able to achieve in life. Of course, self-confidence will not come overnight. This sometimes requires quite a lot of work on yourself. Not everything always works out right away.
Overcoming difficulties
How to cultivate courage? Of course, you can’t do this just sitting on the couch. You need to learn to overcome significant obstacles and improve your skills. If a person does not work on himself, then he will never be able to achieve the desired result. Such a person will always go through life with caution, not understanding what is happening to her and from whom she should once again seek help. What does it mean to be brave? This means, first of all, not to give in to the difficulties that arise. If people constantly hide from new opportunities, then they will never be able to come to what is truly meaningful and valuable to them.
The disadvantages of courage may partly lie only in the fact that a person sometimes goes too far. In an effort to quickly achieve a goal, you can harm yourself and ruin relationships with loved ones, which is why you need to act correctly and worthy of your own choice. You can't be brave like someone else. You must always focus only on yourself, your needs and desires. If a person constantly engages in self-sacrifice, he will never be able to feel truly happy.
Determination
People often ask how to gain the courage to change your life? You need to stop yourself from being afraid. Fear of failure greatly interferes with achieving goals. If a person is brave like a tiger, then he will be able to overcome any obstacles and bypass significant obstacles. Determination is what distinguishes a strong personality from a weak one. Where a weak person gives up, a strong person continues to move forward, stubbornly following his own choice. By accepting responsibility for what is happening, a person learns not to blame other people for what happened to him. In other words, courage is needed in order to acquire the skill of overcoming any difficulties. When a person is aware of this, it becomes easier for him to live and make decisions. Determination is especially important during failures. Then she will not allow the personality, will not allow it to become weak-willed and indecisive.
Thus, when thinking about how to become brave and courageous, you must definitely work on yourself. Until a person takes this necessary step, he will not be able to achieve anything in life. Any goal requires maximum dedication, endurance and patience. By working on oneself, a person cultivates the necessary qualities of character and strengthens faith in his own prospects. According to this moment, its additional capabilities are growing. Those who remain true to themselves usually win in difficult conditions and become stronger than limiting circumstances.
Fears are present in the life of every person, even those who are said to be “not timid.” But for many, fears are a serious obstacle in life. They interfere with building a career and personal life, expressing yourself in relationships with people and, of course, achieving the cherished dreams of your life. Timidity and indecisiveness make a person’s life boring and lacking drive. Try to become bolder and you will immediately see how interesting and varied it will become.
We call a person truly brave who is able to cope with his fears on his own and overcome them. And he does this both in extreme situations and in ordinary life. As a rule, such people, having overcome their fears, never refuse to help others with this. So, a few rules on how to cultivate courage.
The most important thing is the sequence of actions. First, take a piece of paper and write down on it all your unrealized plans. Give approximate dates when you could implement each of them. Describe what prevents you from doing this. And then all that remains is to gradually overcome all these reasons and circumstances, achieving your goals.
Start building your courage small. Don’t be afraid to talk at work and in life about what specifically doesn’t suit you and what you would like to change. Of course, do this without unnecessary fanaticism and immediately offer a way out of the situation: what you yourself could do to change this or that situation. Otherwise, with empty chatter you simply risk making enemies for yourself and acquiring the status of a brave but useless person. In stores, ask sellers questions about the product you like, which you have every right to do. Even if an awkward moment arises, continue what you started, do not panic and do not retreat from the goal.
It is impossible to become brave and decisive in a few days. Psychologists advise to start by changing something in your own appearance and behavior. Buy an outfit that you haven't previously decided to wear, or get a new hairstyle. Such moments show confidence in people, personality changes on a subconscious level. You will feel it immediately.
Very often, indecisive people cannot overcome themselves, because it is extremely important to them how others will react to their actions. And here you need to learn to simply not look back at someone else’s opinion every time. This is certainly very difficult. But this can also be overcome. Be sure: tomorrow no one will remember your action. For people, their own problems are more important than yours.
Many people find it difficult to be the first to communicate with strangers. And this is a big mistake. There is no need to close yourself off, it is better to be confident and sociable. By coming into contact with new people, a person also overcomes fears. Moreover, if you practice this as often as possible, communication becomes a habit. What could be better than this?
After the first fears have been overcome using the methods described above, you can begin to take more decisive action. Are you afraid of horses? Try horseback riding. Are you afraid of heights? And this can be overcome: decide to jump with a parachute. This is quite safe, but the fear of heights will pass, and the feeling of pride in yourself will remain.
Very often we envy brave people and want to be like them. This is amazing. In addition, this is another effective way to cultivate courage. Communicate with brave people, study their behavior, manners, and mentally put yourself in their place. Be sure to think about how they would solve your problem. You will see how the process of developing courage will accelerate.
Well, the main thing that should not be forgotten is, of course, self-discipline. Summarize every day: how many barriers were overcome, what was achieved, what remained uncovered. Repeat to yourself that your confidence is growing. Don’t forget what you would like to achieve, remember it as often as possible. Psychologists say that by overcoming your fears, you can defeat the World. But to do this, you must first defeat yourself.
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