“Everything seems fine, I’m not touching anyone.
Why do drunkards always get attached to me?”
Does your life feel like a vicious circle? You seem to be living a positive life, but still find yourself in unpleasant situations with frightening regularity, as if you are attracting them to yourself just by your existence?
One of my friends constantly wondered why well-tipsy people clung to her so much. Standing, for example, at a bus stop, there are a lot of people around, but it is she who has always become the object of close attention. And every time the story ended in conflict and terrible health. She swore at them in almost all public places.
Another was amazed at the sellers’ aggression. With “enviable” regularity, she encountered overt rudeness and neglect. Although she saw a good half of them for the first time.
Another acquaintance has been laid off for the third time.
“Fate...”, you might think.
No. All these people are victims of a vicious circle. The sad thing is that we OURSELVES are its creator.
If unpleasant situations repeat themselves cyclically in your life, don’t worry. You created them, you will get rid of them. The fact is that some events can affect us so much that even after licking the “external” wounds, we cannot fully cope with the internal ones. Our unconscious plays a cruel joke, reliving the past conflict again and again.
How to break the chains of a vicious circle?
You have to talk to your inner self, the so-called “unconscious”:- Tell me, what do these situations have in common? It is advisable to pay attention to details and focus on your words and actions. And also analyze the behavior of other people involved in the unpleasant situation.
- Remember when it all started. To do this, you can simply ask yourself one question: “When else has this happened?” This is a very important point! You need to find the very first link of your vicious circle.
- Relax as much as possible. If you want, just lie down on the sofa or sit in a comfortable chair. And, sincerely, as if in spirit, answer two main questions:
- What should I understand from this situation?
- Why is this happening to me?
- Forgive everyone who harmed you, thank the Universe for the lesson and let go of the situation.
My first example is that a girl who was being chased by drunk people remembered that a long time ago, when she was little, she was very frightened by a drunk man. This shocked her so much that from then on she fiercely hated all drunk people. And this internal discomfort has attracted similar situations to her for many years. They were repeated because her unconscious saw its old fear in each new person. It took the girl two whole days to convince herself that drunk people do not pose a threat and have a right to exist. And as soon as she forgave them, life changed overnight. All conflicts stopped, and drunks no longer pestered. The vicious circle is broken.
According to my observations, many people become victims of their long-forgotten beliefs. But our unconscious remembers everything. Talk to him and remove unnecessary worries.
Good luck to you! And don’t forget, you are capable of even the impossible! Believe in yourself.
Anastasia Volkova for the site
Hello, dear friends!
Have a magical time of day! Tell me honestly, how often do you swear or try to take out your bad mood, fatigue or irritability on someone close to you? We especially often fall into a similar state when we return home after a busy day at work, and there... Sometimes it is difficult to control the very process of splashing out negativity, and for some it can even drag on for more than one hour. Mutual reproaches and claims begin, and the evening turns into a shootout of caustic phrases.
How to stop your flow of irritability? As they say, we grumbled a little and that’s enough...
Everything is much simpler than you think. If you feel like you’re going too far, but you’re swearing like crazy, replace all the words that come out with “BU.” And mumble as much as you want. By the way, you can leave the intonation the same. Believe me, in a couple of minutes there will be no trace of your negativity!
Today we will talk about the phenomenon of a vicious circle and find out how to get out of it...
“Everything seems fine, I’m not touching anyone.
Why do drunkards always get attached to me?”
Does your life feel like a vicious circle? You seem to be living a positive life, but still find yourself in unpleasant situations with frightening regularity, as if you are attracting them to yourself just by your existence?
One of my friends constantly wondered why well-tipsy people clung to her so much. Standing, for example, at a bus stop, there are a lot of people around, but it is she who has always become the object of close attention. And every time the story ended in conflict and terrible health. She swore at them in almost all public places.
Another was amazed at the sellers’ aggression. With “enviable” regularity, she encountered overt rudeness and neglect. Although she saw a good half of them for the first time.
Another acquaintance has been laid off for the third time.
“Fate...”, you might think.
No. All these people are victims of a vicious circle. The sad thing is that we OURSELVES are its creator.
If unpleasant situations repeat themselves cyclically in your life, don’t worry. You created them, you will get rid of them. The fact is that some events can affect us so much that even after licking the “external” wounds, we cannot fully cope with the internal ones. Our unconscious plays a cruel joke, reliving the past conflict again and again.
How to break the chains of a vicious circle?
You have to talk to your inner self, the so-called “unconscious”:
1. Tell me, what do these situations have in common? It is advisable to pay attention to details and focus on your words and actions. And also analyze the behavior of other people involved in the unpleasant situation.
2. Remember when it all started. To do this, you can simply ask yourself one question: “When else has this happened?” This is a very important point! You need to find the very first link of your vicious circle.
3. Relax as much as possible. If you want, just lie down on the sofa or sit in a comfortable chair. And, sincerely, as in spirit, answer two main questions:
What should I understand from this situation?
Why is this happening to me?
4. Forgive everyone who harmed you, thank the Universe for the lesson and let go of the situation.
Your inner dialogue will bring you true healing. And don’t even doubt the effectiveness of this method.
My first example is that a girl who was being chased by drunk people remembered that a long time ago, when she was little, she was very frightened by a drunk man. This shocked her so much that from then on she fiercely hated all drunk people. And this internal discomfort has attracted similar situations to her for many years. They were repeated because her unconscious saw its old fear in each new person. It took the girl two whole days to convince herself that drunk people do not pose a threat and have a right to exist. And as soon as she forgave them, life changed overnight. All conflicts stopped, and drunks no longer pestered. The vicious circle is broken.
According to my observations, many people become victims of their long-forgotten beliefs. But our unconscious remembers everything. Talk to him and remove unnecessary worries.
Good luck to you! And don’t forget, you are capable of even the impossible! Believe in yourself.
In the library of wizards on the “Dreams Come True” website you can find wonderful books by V. Zhikarentsev, which contain amazing techniques for finding the causes of your pressing problems. Read and change your life for the better!
Let's talk about our daily life. Busy and preoccupied with problems (as it seems to us), we do not think about their origin, but we consider them obstacles to a calm life. And we have no time to carefully and slowly figure out what is preventing us from living peacefully! Vicious circle. We need to stop, figure it out and get out of this circle, but there’s no time! And we don’t believe that we can do it... So we spin like a squirrel in a wheel, hopelessly, with anxiety and longing in our souls about the unrealizable.
But there is a way. Not only to break the vicious circle, but also to find your own path to a happy life, your own path.
You've probably flown to the airport at least once or arrived by train and remember how, when leaving the airport/station, taxi drivers rush towards you and offer to take you during the interruption, asking the same question: "Where are you going?" Do you think they are interested in where you want to go: home, on a visit, to a hotel? And if you have not yet decided on your place of stay, then at the station everyone will offer you their own option: hotel, philosophy, religion. Life is so similar to the situation I described.
As soon as we are born, we are wrapped in a system of verbal communications, in family clothes of social meanings. Who's lucky? Then, like taxi drivers, different value systems offer themselves: “The main thing is to be rich”, “Become a boss - you will get everything”, “Think about yourself”, “Give yourself to God” etc. But you still don’t know where to go and what will be at the end of the road - a house, a hotel, another station. And so, having sat down in a taxi suitable for you or your parents or guardians, you drive and begin to understand that you are going in the wrong place, you don’t want to go at all, but you want to stop and look around, at least. But the taxi driver says to you: “Look at the traffic, you can’t stop, you have to go, there’s nowhere to go, if you stop, you’ll be left with nothing, the cargo you’ve accumulated and are carrying will move on, your loved ones will also leave, you’ll be left alone.” And you drive on and think, but really, what’s there!
But the truth is different!
It's never too late to stop. But, most likely, it’s bitter. It is bitter to see with the eyes from which the veil has been removed, the futility and vanity of the world of consumers, careerists, “values” that have ceased to be understandable to you. Compared to the simple, human background, they look miserable and unnatural.
But stopping is still half the battle, even less than half the battle. You can be left alone, restless on the road, with evil in your soul, that no one met you with flowers and put you in another car, and, having completely lost faith in yourself and your happiness, without waiting for decisions, flowers and a new taxi from anyone , try to get into any, more or less suitable car. In this case, when you think that someone should lead you by the hand, tell you how to act and what to do, it’s better not to go out, but to roll where life takes you and be the toy of circumstances, proudly telling everyone about karma, about the saints or not very intercessors and mentors.
But if you have the courage to stop, look around and decide for yourself, then be patient a little longer and look at life with joy. After all, it was you who got the lucky ticket to be born consciously, and not in the form of mold, into the world of planet Earth, remaining the highest being of the universe, Man. Let this thought only sparkle in your mind, but even a small spark of universal knowledge can be the basis of a short but entire human life.
Human wisdom consists of consciousness and love. The consciousness of God and his endless unconditional love. Timeless, which means in any time and place, wisdom manifests itself through a person, through you. Yes, it takes effort. "Don't let your soul be lazy". An effort not to get angry, an effort to develop consciousness, because only it cognizes the world around us. Pleasant, kind work on yourself. And secrets will be revealed, so clear that you will think - why didn’t I understand this before! For example, the fact that a person creates his own world by his own existence. He wants this world to be evil and sad, he wants it to be kind and happy. And here it’s not far to the goal. Agree, it’s somehow calmer to go when you know where. But the goal is everyone’s business and knowledge. No one but you will recognize and determine your goal. This is where Man differs from people who ride in suitable other people's taxis. He knows his own purpose in life. And what is most interesting is that this goal is not something that is ahead, in the distant future, but always in the Man himself, and it is this goal, which has become the essence of the Man, that makes him happy. But not alone. It is not seclusion and detachment from the world that makes a person happy alone with his goal or something else. Having achieved an understanding of the purpose of his existence, Man finds himself among others like him, he becomes big and free, able to accommodate and accept the whole world, including the one that now seems to him like a toy, along with taxis, with people driving and thinking, because he knows and sees something that others don’t notice or even think about its existence.
This is happiness - to contain Peace, Love and Wisdom within yourself!
“Your happiness cannot come from outside. If so, then this is dependent, fragile happiness, which will soon turn into sadness.”
J. Foster
For a very long time my main teacher has been my World. He always shows me where to look and what to accept in myself in order to become even more free.
My World with great love reflects to me my beliefs and convictions, all my fears and doubts. Everything that has been collected by me over many lives and accepted as my experience.
Having once set the goal of achieving inner freedom, my world gives me hints every day about what I need to accept in myself.
The topic of addiction has accompanied me since childhood
My dad was addicted to alcohol. And not just Dad, in my world there were a huge number of men and women with various types of clearly manifested addictions.
Read also: !? Think about it, what was “alcohol” originally? Wine is grape juice with sugar. Vodka is a wheat drink, etc.
I didn’t even think about other addictions then. Many years of not accepting alcohol, resentment towards my father, years of letters of forgiveness... When we came to the understanding that we think in images, I looked at the image of “alcohol” the very first. This topic was so painful for me.
What is addiction?
This is Subordination to others, to someone else's will, someone else's power, in the absence of independence and freedom.
Addiction(addiction, English addiction - inclination, habit) - an obsessive need to perform certain actions, despite the adverse consequences of a medical, psychological or social nature.
In a different meaning addiction(English dependence - dependence) - the desire to rely on another person (or other people) to obtain satisfaction, security, and achieve one's goals.
What do we depend on and what does the World show us when we meet dependent people?
1) We depend on the love of others
Love and dependence are not just different, but practically opposite, in essence, phenomena.
Love brings joy, and addiction brings suffering, or painful, poisonous, short-term pleasure, similar to the pleasure of a drug addict. Love allows everything to be, but dependence is always mixed with Fear and a sense of separation.
For example: a woman does everything for her husband or children, gives all her strength, dissolves in the family, lives for the sake of others. Suddenly the husband leaves, the children grow up and live their own lives. The world collapsed, everything lost its meaning.
What is this woman's fear? The fact is that she actually made certain sacrifices for a reason; giving away her strength, her youth, dissolving in the family, she sought to get something in return - most often unconsciously. Receive in return complete understanding, unconditional acceptance, love, gratitude, security.
We forgot that Love, acceptance, a sense of security cannot be obtained from the outside, no matter how much we look for it in the outside world.
Read also: . Now is the time to love ourselves, and without this, everything else that we strive for will either elude us or will be given to us with great difficulty.
2) We depend on the approval of our relatives
Many people, like air, need approval, which means the love of other people. Most often, we wait for approval from our loved ones and when we don’t receive approval, we get offended. Remembering that you already have everything you need, and it is inside you, you stop looking for approval, which means support and love from the outside, you yourself begin to give it, out of excess, because you are the Source. You approve of yourself. And you attract people who approve and support you.
3) We depend on the state of love and joy
Once having experienced a state of love and joy, I began to strive for this state, I did hundreds of excavations, loaded various feelings into myself, and struggled with the state of apathy and laziness. And the state of joy was a rare guest inside me. I ran away from the state of unlove, I fought with it and did not accept it.
We are looking for a state from the outside. We read prayers, sing mantras, trying to achieve a state of harmony and joy
If we have received temporary relief from prayer, we resort to prayer more and more often. If we have received relief from chanting mantras or listening to meditations, we resort more and more often to what we think gives us a state of calm. This is how addiction is born.
We tie our state of joy and love to certain places, people or events
Read also: Article by Natalia Strihar: it is impossible to please everyone, much less be loved by everyone. You are not a banknote. Love is a gift, a gift from the bottom of my heart.
Joy always lives within us! When we go within, we discover within ourselves an inexhaustible source of JOY.
4) We depend on having money
Many people have this type of addiction. If there is money, the state is joyful and elated, if the money runs out - despondency and fear. Did you find out the status? One day I vividly realized this state within myself. As a rule, we see this in other people, in our husbands or children. The whole truth is that what you saw in your family is yours. Theirs is what they see in you!
When the state of love and joy does not depend on external factors, on the presence or absence of money, when we recognize ourselves as the source, then then freedom comes.
5) We depend on recognition
We all need recognition, recognition of our individuality, recognition of us as individuals, recognition of our merits. We are used to looking for, asking, demanding recognition from other people, or, working hard and hard, to receive it. When we recognize ourselves, value our experience, our personality, then others will reflect this to us. All we need is self-recognition!
6) We depend on the states of other people
If a husband or wife is happy and joyful, we feel good and cheerful. As soon as our loved ones are not in the mood, our mood disappears...
A dependent person feels helpless and needs constant support.
Flight into addiction is a refusal of the choice that any person has. Instead of becoming dependent, which means choosing a life full of hopeless suffering and pain, you can always make a choice in favor of yourself, your happiness and your joy, which do not depend on external sources and circumstances.
Since childhood, we have a need for unconditional love, complete acceptance, self-expression, emotional communication, understanding and fulfillment of needs. If a child has not received this in the family, over time, he may begin to use chemicals in order to protect his self, to regain a sense of comfort, security, and calm. But at the same time, he has no access to his feelings, and this, in turn, causes very high internal tension and the inability to satisfy his needs in healthy ways. This is precisely the role of the use of chemical agents; with their help, people change their condition, achieving a feeling of “relief”.