Change for the better: externally and internally. My schedule

Millions of people wonder how to start new life and change yourself but they don't do anything.

Let's find out how anyone can become completely different.

Is it possible?

Can a person change radically?

Is it possible to change your temperament? Is it possible to change your life scenario, fate?

To begin with, it is important to answer the question: is a person capable of changing so that practically become a different person?

When we live in certain conditions, nothing new happens around us, then there is no incentive for development. In this case, it is almost impossible to change, especially if there is no motivation.

A person lives in his comfort zone. Yes, he has a small salary, unfortunate personal life, but he continues to seem to want to change everything, but does nothing. always scary.

Our actions, goals, and motivation are influenced by those that have developed in the process. social development characteristics of the psyche and personality. The basis of character, what we are given at birth, is.

Type nervous system it is almost impossible to change, although it is quite possible to learn to act differently and develop specific traits in yourself.

For example, if he wants to be more active and sociable, then he will have to try and work on himself. He is quite capable of learning to control himself, although this is difficult for him.

Above character traits you can also work.

If you are unhappy with specific personality traits, develop a plan to get rid of them.

There is a theory that we are destined for a certain destiny, and we can't change it. However, examples from many people disprove this theory. For example, people born with disabilities.

They could live on a disability pension and be content with that. But there are those who, despite difficulties, work, achieve, and become famous and respected people.

Part of the script is written into us from childhood. Parents and those closest to us instill attitudes in us and shape our character. Childhood trauma has a particularly strong impact.

But that doesn't mean that I'll have to deal with it. We have the power to change the script written in us by our parents; we just need to identify what prevents us from becoming successful and achieving what we want.

What can you change about yourself?

What would I like to change about myself? Yes almost anything. Do you want to be more liberated, learn oratory skills- go to courses, trainings.

If you don’t like your temper, yoga will help. You understand that your muscles are weak, you are inferior to other people in endurance - why not go in for sports.

IN modern world a huge number of possibilities.

And the point is not that we can’t, but that we don’t want, we’re afraid, we’re lazy, we don’t want to leave familiar zone comfort.

But this is the only way that change happens.

How to find out what you want to change:

  • write down your personality traits, evaluate what you would like to keep and what to get rid of;
  • list your achievements;
  • write what you would like to achieve, but have not achieved;
  • think about what prevented you from getting what you wanted;
  • who do you blame for failures - external world, parents, yourself;

If you can’t decide for yourself, then go for a consultation with a psychologist. He will conduct the appropriate tests and help you choose the direction of movement.

Choose a professional coach who deals specifically with the problem of self-development.

Where to begin?

How to change your life for the better? Any change starts somewhere. They don't happen on their own. The exception is psychotraumatic situations when sharp revaluation of values.

Where to begin? Understand what exactly you want to change. Be realistic about your personality, achievements and mistakes. Don't be afraid to get to know yourself. Sometimes we know that we have some shortcomings, but our consciousness does not allow us to adequately evaluate them.

If you can’t do it yourself, ask people you trust.

Be prepared for criticism and don’t be offended if you hear something you don’t want.

Change is about motivation. Set goals for yourself: why to change, what you want to ultimately achieve, in what time frame.

How to change?

Now let's get down to it difficult stage: the process of changing one’s personality and life.

Your personality beyond recognition

Manifestation of personality outside - this is our specialty. If you know your weaknesses, work on them.

  1. Change your schedule radically. Write a daily schedule, remove everything unnecessary that prevents you from achieving your goal.
  2. Pay attention to life successful people: read their biography, find out how they went towards their goal, what obstacles they overcame. Be inspired by their experiences.
  3. Learn something new every day.
  4. Change your social circle. The social environment has strong influence on us, it can inspire or sink us to the bottom.

    Eliminate losers, whiners, and pessimists from your circle.

  5. Work on your character traits - improve the positive ones and try to get rid of the negative ones.

Inner world

How to change internally? Who are you - a pessimist or an optimist, or maybe you consider yourself a realist?

We see the world in black colors, we pay attention to the negative, as a result, life becomes worse and worse, and positive events disappear from our lives.

Try to look at the world with different eyes. It's not easy, especially at the beginning.

When you wake up, smile. Just smile at the new day, even if yours is waiting hard work, spring-cleaning, a trip to a government office.

Remember - you create your own world.

Do a little exercise: imagine that there is light around you, you are radiating radiance into the world, and all people notice it. White, gentle light, emitting kindness, energy, warmth

You will see how your day will go differently, people will start noticing you, complimenting you, and yours will be much better.

Thinking positive

How to change your thoughts to positive ones? Every day find something positive around you. Let it be the little things first. It began to rain - weather conducive to relaxation and reflection.

Being rude in transport - perhaps the world wants you to pay attention to something or this is a test of your emotional fortitude. See the city with different eyes- architecture, thousands of people rushing to work.

Communicate as little as possible with negative people. Even if you consider them your friends, negativity is contagious.

That's why look for those with whom it is pleasant to communicate, with whom you feel at ease, who increases your energy and does not take it away.

Positive thinking requires practice. At first it will be difficult to look for the positive; it will seem to you that everything is bad. But after just three weeks, you will be surprised to notice how the world has begun to change, and you along with it.

Beliefs

First, decide whether you really need to change them. If other people demand it, remember that beliefs are features of your personality. You shouldn't change just because others demand it.

If you want to really change your beliefs, then read more, evaluate opinions, facts, look for the right ones.

Lifestyle

It's simple - start doing something right now. Not tomorrow, Monday or New Year's, but from this minute. If you want to get rid of a bad habit, do it immediately, don’t wait for the right moment, because it won’t come.

If you want to get up earlier, set an alarm; if one is not enough, set three. You will begin to get used to the new regime within a few days.

You waste a lot of time on useless activities - just stop doing them now- disable social media, remove the TV from the house, stop meeting people who take up your time and do not benefit you.

Habits

How to force yourself to change your habits? Motivation is what matters.

Answer yourself the question- Why do you want to change your habits? Keep your eyes open.

If you smoke, then remember about your health, wrinkles, sagging skin, and lung problems that will certainly await you in a few years. Bad habits- this is early aging.

You want to have a fresh and blooming appearance for as long as possible, be active, enjoy opposite sex- Then break the habit now. A person gets used to new conditions in about 21 days; you only need to hold out for three weeks.

Attitude to life

Develop optimism in yourself. Yes, it seems that everything is bad. In fact, there are many beautiful things in the world. Life was difficult at any time, but now we have so many opportunities that we need to use them.

What does your pessimism give you? You see everything in black and gray. Worried about your health, poor salary, evil people. So start living for yourself. Enjoy life for yourself. Work and achieve for yourself.

Stop complaining. Remember: they don’t like complainers and whiners. If you want to be pitied, stop yourself. No one cares about our problems, but your complaints will push away truly worthwhile and positive people.

How to change for the better?

For a girl

Girls they love strong guys who are capable of action.

They prefer those who keep their word, who they can trust, and with whom they are not afraid to go through life.

How to change:

  • develop;
  • forget about aimless pastime;
  • work;
  • make time for relaxation together;
  • respect the girl;
  • devote time to her, but do not be too intrusive - there should not be an excess of attention, otherwise it will quickly get boring.

The most important- Be purposeful, don’t stop there.

For a guy

If you plan to live happily ever after with a guy, you will have to work on your personality.

No, in no case do you need to adapt to someone, remain yourself, but develop your best qualities.

What to do:

The worst thing you can think of is falsehood and pretense. Remain yourself, develop yourself positive thinking and strive to be active in life.

Real stories of people

There are many examples of people who decided to radically change their lives, and age is not a hindrance to this.

Daphne Selfe is 86 years old. Fame came to her after 70, when she decided to become a fashion model. Her husband died, the children became adults, and she was faced with a choice - like everyone else, spend her old age in front of the TV or live for herself.

Grant Achatz. He beat cancer and fulfilled his dream of becoming a famous chef.

Susan Street is 59 years old. She dropped excess weight after 50 years, and since then dramatic changes began in her life. She survived job loss, cancer, became a vegetarian, started her own blog, and helps other people change.

There are thousands of such examples.

All you need is a push, a realization that your life is meaningless and wrong. Don't wait for the right moment, start changing from now on.

How to start a new life? 10 steps that will change you and your life:

Modern girls are ready for the most daring changes in their lives, for constant self-improvement. Many people know to become better, smarter, more attractive, sexier, you need to work a lot on your appearance, lifestyle, habits and rules of behavior.

If you are wondering how to become a better person, a clear 30-day plan will help you. Every girl can change her life for the better! It's not as difficult as it seems.

To one representative fair half It takes years for humanity to change its image; others try to introduce something new into life in a very short period of time.

In any case, if the result were guaranteed, quite a lot of people would like to know how to make yourself and your life better in just 30 days, girl. In our article you will learn how to implement this and change radically in just a month. Improve yourself externally and internally.

Changing for the better is not as difficult as it seems.

How to become better in a month: a real action plan

To improve your internal and external data in 30 days, you need to create an action plan to work on your appearance and habits.

How to become a better girl in 30 days: monthly plan

1 Week 2 week 3 week 4 week
Get used to getting up early. Throw away all unnecessary items and things that are not in demand for a long time.Make a plan for rest and work, completing everything point by point.Try to do things differently than before, learn new things.
Eat light food. Finish all planned tasks or abandon unnecessary ones.Make a dream map.Fight all your fears.
Do sports, dance or yoga every day. Stop communicating with people who negatively affect self-esteem (exception: parents).Every evening, make a plan for the coming day.Rest properly (without the Internet, outside the home, alone with yourself).

Cosmetic procedures to make you look better

To improve your appearance, you need to visit a cosmetologist. The elasticity and firmness of the skin is maintained by regular facial cleansing, which can be:

  • ultrasonic;
  • manual;
  • peeling.
  • fruit peeling;
  • mesotherapy;
  • biorevitalization.


After 30:

  • correction of fine wrinkles with butoloxin;
  • fillers with hyaluronic acid.

By the age of 40, it is necessary to add volume, freshness, and clarity of lines. Recommended procedures:

  • plasma lifting;
  • peeling;
  • revitalization;
  • laser polishing;

Cosmetic procedures are selected strictly according to age and specialist recommendations.

Skin, hair and nail care

External changes should affect hair, skin and nails. Hair should look well-groomed, without split ends (you need to keep an eye on this). The roots of the hair should be tinted in time, and the remaining length should be refreshed if necessary.

Gelatin-based masks will help improve hair condition for dry texture, with the addition of cognac for oily curls. If your hair length allows, you can master braiding, this will add a novelty to your look, and it’s also fashionable. For middle length Bronzing is suitable for hair.

Please note: nails should be regularly taken care of. Men don't like peeling manicures, hangnails, or dirt under their nails.

To the stronger sex I like French, red or better yet clear varnish. If a girl takes care of her nails every day for 30 days, it will become a habit.

A modern girl doesn’t always manage to get her nails done every day, so it’s worth resorting to salon care.. A procedure such as nail lamination has proven itself well. It restores the nail plate, hides all flaws and imperfections.

The nails are covered with a substance that fills all the depressions and deformations. After the procedure, the plates become healthier, aesthetics and nutrition return to them. This procedure will improve appearance nails, and preparatory stage in the form of a hand massage will give you a feeling of relaxation and complete harmony.

Facial skin should have an even tone, a fresh, well-groomed appearance with highlighting makeup. To do this, you need to nourish, moisturize, cleanse and refresh your face every day. This will prolong your youth.

Facial products are selected according to skin type. At home, in the refrigerator, there should be ice cubes with chamomile, which should be used to wipe your face daily. After a week of such procedures, the skin calms down, the color evens out, freshness appears, and fatigue disappears.

A light tan will help you become more attractive. Self-tanning or visiting a solarium are suitable for this.

How to become better: proper nutrition

The right diet will help you become better: internally and externally.


Healthy eating- the key to healthy life and good mood
  • Before starting any meal, 1/4 hour before, you need to drink 200 ml of water.
  • Every day a girl should drink at least 2 liters of water.
  • By eliminating unhealthy high-calorie foods for 30 days, you can lose extra pounds.
  • The side dishes that existed before this time must be replaced with vegetable dishes.
  • Eliminate sausages, sausages and other semi-finished products from your diet forever.
  • The interval between meals should be at least 3 hours, meals should be fractional.
  • The evening meal should be 2.5 hours before going to bed.
  • Every week you need to do fasting days.
  • You can't skip breakfast.
  • Every day on an empty stomach you need to drink 1 tsp. flax oil
  • It is better to replace baked goods with citrus fruits.

It is important to know! Do not drink liquid or water after eating (at least half an hour must pass).

The best diets for weight loss and wellness

To answer the question of how to become better in 30 days, a girl needs to get her figure in order. Various diets will help with this, the most popular of which are soup, kefir and fractional diets.

Soup diet will help you lose weight quickly

The diet consists of a variety of soups without potatoes, legumes and butter. During the diet, you should avoid bread. Use salt in very small doses. After a seven-day period, you can lose up to 4 kg of excess weight.

Kefir in the fight against extra pounds

This diet is designed for 7 days. During this time, it is easy to lose up to 5 kg of excess weight. During the week you need to drink 1.5-2 liters of low-fat kefir daily.

Diet Ladder

This diet is designed for 5 days. On the first day, you need to cleanse your intestines (during the day, eat 2 kg of apples and drink Activated carbon). On the second day, the body requires recovery (eat cottage cheese and kefir).


The “Lesenka” diet will help you quickly lose weight

The third day of the meal should consist of foods rich in healthy sugars. The fourth day is protein (eat boiled lean poultry). Fifth day – fiber in the diet (muesli, oatmeal, fruits are suitable).

In 5 days you can lose 7 kg. The diet can be carried out every 2 weeks, the main thing is that there are no problems with the gastrointestinal tract.

How to become a better girl in 30 days - psychological trainings

You can become better in a month with the help psychological trainings. Each girl chooses a program for herself that will help develop her hidden qualities.


Self-confidence is another component successful life!

Choosing for yourself the desired program, in 30 days you can completely change yourself, and most importantly, change everything around you. Raise your self-esteem and become more successful.

Girls become better after training programs, and the main question of how disappears in itself. Any issues can be resolved with ease, there is no fear or fear, which means an end to depression and stress.

You can conduct independent training at home. To do this, you need to write down on a piece of paper all the good deeds, achievements, awards, joyful memories.

You need to read this list every day, and soon it will turn into a life guide. The more positive deeds and accomplishments that come to mind, the longer the list will be, which means daily readings for 5 minutes a day will give positive results.

You need to remember to praise yourself - this is a reward and an increase in self-esteem. You can practice praise in front of a mirror.

Don’t forget to smile at yourself every day - then things will be most successful.

Creating a new image to become even better

Every girl has her own image, which is more acceptable and comfortable for her, but to change in better side will have to change completely. This means that the path to success lies through dramatic changes.


Changing your image can start with your hairstyle:
long straight hair - curl, and curls - straighten, get a fashionable haircut or coloring. This season, ombre and balayage are at the peak of fashion.

Change your usual makeup, trying to make it fashionable: painted eyelashes, eyes lined with eyeliner, foundation, neat and expressive eyebrows, gloss or lipstick.

If you have vision problems, then your usual glasses should be replaced with contact lenses.. If you used contact lenses, stylish glasses or colored lenses will help you change your look.

Changing your image also applies to changing your wardrobe. Business women who are accustomed to formal suits can dilute their look with lighter and more playful accessories, for example, use bright color scarf combined with a dark suit. Lovers of a relaxed sporty style can purchase several feminine dresses and high-heeled shoes.


The whole look is highlighted by stylish accessories.
: bags, belts, jewelry, and most importantly shoes. All things should complement each other.

Changing your image is not just about creating a new image, you need to change your habits, remove unnecessary gestures, change loud laughter to a smile. Knowing your complexes and shortcomings, they need to be corrected.

To make a girl better, she must have its own individual unique image. You should not constrain yourself, just as you should not be shy about making new acquaintances (in 30 days, you can make at least 10 friends). It is necessary to make new friends all the time, but at the same time not to forget about the existing ones. Your social circle should be diverse.

Quite a lot important role plays sociability. In a company you need to be cheerful, joyful, then the success of leadership is guaranteed, in any company there is a place for such positive person.


Sociability is the key to success in life. Don't have 100 rubles, but have 100 friends!

Important to remember! Having loved yourself with all your might, others will not remain indifferent. It’s not for nothing that there is a proverb: love yourself the way you want others to love you.

Wanting to become better is painstaking daily, minute-by-minute work. You will have to work on your views, taste, image, feelings, fears, perfection and external data.

If you do not deviate from the rules, then achieving your goal will be very close, and all unpleasant memories and fears will remain in the old life.

Useful videos on how to change your life for the better. How to become a better girl

10 TIPS FOR GIRLS ON HOW TO BECOME HEALTHIER AND BEAUTIFUL:

HOW TO BECOME A BEAUTIFUL GIRL - THE MAIN SECRET:

LIFE HACKS FOR GIRLS // HOW TO BE BEAUTIFUL AND WELL-KNOWN:

How to become a better girl in 30 days:

Fortunately, man is a plastic creature that changes throughout his life. But there is a danger here, because change can not only be for the better, but also gain or worsen negative traits character.

That is, such characteristics as laziness, indifference, consumer attitude towards family and friends, irritability, callousness, etc. there is no need to even develop them - they are acquired and improved by a person themselves.

Positive qualities need to be developed and worked on. Only conscious work on yourself will help you change for the better.

The feeling of dissatisfaction with oneself and one’s appearance is common to everyone: men, women, children, and adolescents. Every person is dissatisfied with himself to some extent.

The guys have not yet realized their essence and have not defined best features their appearance, they are not confident in themselves, they doubt that they will be loved. This is a very painful condition, which is aggravated by some teenage problems.

Systematic work on yourself will help you become better, more confident, love yourself, and change for the better. Start playing sports, stick to it proper nutrition and self-care.

How can you change for the better?

Any changes in a person do not happen quickly - everything will happen gradually, you just need not to give up, but to work systematically. And we need to start with the most difficult thing - changing self-awareness.

Self-awareness and worldview are extremely important question for every person, and especially for a young girl. If she feels insignificant, petty, ugly, stupid, then, unfortunately, this will be so.

To change for the better means to accept yourself as you are, to love your shortcomings, most often exaggerated or imaginary, and also to change your attitude towards your “dissimilarity” from other people.

We are all different, and this is absolutely normal and natural. No more sad sight, how similar friend on each other people. We must be different from each other, be individual.

It was our dissimilarity from each other that allowed man to survive and continue his journey across the planet.

But for young girls this is a painful moment. They really want to be like. their idols: classmates, singers, actresses. And only externally.

How to change a girl's appearance

The main thing for a guy is to understand his imperfections and want to change. Many guys have high self-esteem, so they are satisfied with their behavior, character, appearance and do not want to change anything.

You can change for the better for a girl with the help of correct installation. The main thing is to set a goal and systematically move towards it.

Most The best way to change for the better for a 13-year-old girl - acquiring new skills and knowledge. Sign up for language classes, start taking classes at some educational institution, read not only the VKontkte wall, but also educational literature, good art books. You yourself will not notice how your horizons will expand, how you will become an interesting and competent interlocutor, new friends will appear, your social circle will change.

How things will change for the better for the guy

Changing yourself is a little easier for a girl than for a guy. The possibilities of clothing and makeup allow a girl to often change her image. Train, find your style, try new looks.

A woman generally changes often, so you only need to correctly correct these changes, step by step.

  • The favorite among problems with appearance for every person is the issue of figure. How often young girls are dissatisfied with their shape! “I’m fat, short,” “I have small breasts, fat legs, no waist” - all this and much more causes painful doubts, self-loathing, and interferes with life. Girls, do you want to change your appearance? Then start working on yourself. Sign up for Gym, work out with a personal trainer, find videos on the Internet with lessons on cardio classes, shaping, stretching exercises, Pilates. As a last resort, do not skip physical education classes.
  • Very often, for a girl to change her appearance, and for a guy too, it means improving the condition of her skin. Pimples, acne, inflammation and other problems look completely unaesthetic. In this case, select good complex care for teenage problem skin. If this does not give results, visit a doctor, since some problems with the gastrointestinal tract can cause certain skin diseases and affect appearance.
  • If you want to change your appearance, then learn how to dress correctly and beautifully, apply makeup, do beautiful hairstyles, find and create your own image. Don't know how to do all this? Ask your mother, older friends for help, sign up for makeup, makeup artistry, and hairdressing courses. Who knows, maybe these skills will be useful to you not only for yourself, but will also become the basis of your future profession.

Can a person change for the better?

There is an opinion that it is very difficult to improve your character and appearance, both for a girl and a guy. Yes, it is not easy, but it is quite doable. To avoid losing interest in this process, start small.

Record even your smallest victories and praise yourself for them. We did something good, we read something that wasn’t very exciting, but useful book, honestly learned a lesson, corrected a mistake in a relationship? Well done! It may not be big, but it is very important step, a stepping stone to change for the better. Little by little you will go all the way, do everything you planned.

A psychologist's advice on how to change yourself is always aimed at changing your inner self. Indeed, it is impossible for a person to change externally without changing internally.

Changes for the better will change not only you, but also your destiny, and in the most positive way.

Most main advice– do not put off this decision until tomorrow or the new month. Start changing for the better here and now.

There is a deep-seated feeling in all of us that we must act and think exactly as we act and think. It is consistent with or an expression of our beliefs. If there were no belief, then there would be no manifestation of it. There is something in us that causes us to be overweight, bad relationships, failure, poverty, frustration, etc.

How many times have you repeated to yourself: “ I will never do this again!” Despite this statement, you eat cake again, light a cigarette again, be rude to people you care about, etc., even though the day has not yet ended when you promised yourself not to do this again. And yet we do it.

And then we complicate the problem even more when we angrily tell ourselves: “ You don't have any the slightest strength will!" And this makes even more difficult the overwhelming burden of guilt that we already carry on our shoulders. Instead, tell yourself: “ I want to free myself from the hidden desire to be unworthy all the time. I deserve the best in life and I give myself permission to accept it with love.».

The attitude of many of us towards life is primarily a feeling of helplessness. We have long given up on life with its hopelessness and hopelessness. For some, this is due to countless disappointments, for others, constant pain, etc. But the result is the same for everyone - a complete rejection of life and an unwillingness to see oneself and one’s life in a completely different way. Well, if you asked yourself the question: “what exactly causes constant disappointment in my life?” What is it that you give away so generously that causes others to irritate you so much? Whatever you give, you get back. The more irritated you become, the more you create situations that irritate you. I wonder if you were annoyed now while reading the previous paragraph? If yes, then that's great! That's why you need to change! Deciding to change Now let's talk about change and our desire to change. We all want our lives to change for the better, but we ourselves don’t want to change. Let someone else change, let “they” change, and I’ll wait. In order to change anyone else, you must first change yourself. And you must change internally. We must change the way we think, the way we speak, and the things we say. Only then will real change come. I personally have always been stubborn. Even when I made the decision to change, this stubbornness got in my way. But I still knew that this was where I needed a change. The more I hold on to any statement, the clearer it is to me that it is this statement that I need to free myself from. And only when you are convinced of this from your own experience can you teach others. It seems to me that all the wonderful spiritual teachers had extraordinary difficult childhood, went through pain and suffering, but learned to free themselves, which they began to teach others. Many good teachers They constantly work on themselves and this becomes their main occupation in life. Exercise “I want to change” Repeat the phrase: “I want to change for the better” as often as possible. While saying this phrase to yourself, touch your throat. The throat is the center where all the energy necessary for change is concentrated. And be prepared for change when it comes into your life. Know also that if you think that somewhere you cannot change yourself, that is where you need to change. “I want to change. I want to change." The forces of the Universe will automatically help you in your intention, and you will be surprised to discover more and more positive changes in your life. Another exercise Go to the mirror and tell yourself: “I want to change.” Notice how this makes you feel. If you find yourself resisting or hesitating, ask yourself why? For God's sake, don't beat yourself up, just celebrate it. Ask yourself what statement or thought makes you feel this way? You have to dissolve it regardless. whether you know where you got it from or not. Go back to the mirror, look deeply into your eyes, touch your throat and say loudly 10 times: “I want to free myself from all resistance.” Working with a mirror helps a lot. Looking yourself in the eye and saying a positive statement about yourself is the most quick way get good results.

How can you change? Change your beliefs

Change your beliefs and your life will change ! Every thought we have can change! If unwanted thoughts come to you all the time, stop yourself from such thoughts and tell them: “Get out!” Instead, accept a thought that can bring you good luck. Self-improvement is based on three principles:

  • Desire to change.
  • Control over the mind.
  • Forgiving yourself and others.

We talked about the desire to change for the better above, let's talk about control over the mind. We are all much more than our minds. You probably think that the mind is responsible for everything in your life. But such a belief is based only on the fact that you think so.

Your mind is a tool that can be used this way and that way. He is always at your service. Turn off the chatterbox in your mind for a moment and think about the meaning of the statement: “your mind is your tool.” And you decide how to use it yourself.

The thoughts you choose create all your life situations. There is incredible power in thoughts and words. And when you learn to control your thoughts and words, you will be in harmony with this power. Don't think that your mind controls you. Quite the contrary, you control your mind.

Exercise "Release"

Take a deep breath and then exhale all the air. Relax your body. Then tell yourself, “I want to be free. I am released from all tension. I am freeing myself from all my old beliefs. I feel calm. I'm at peace with myself. I am at peace with the process of life itself. I'm safe".

Repeat this exercise three times. When you feel like you're in difficult situation, repeat these phrases to yourself. And then they will become a part of you and will be so natural that all the tension and daily struggle will gradually disappear from your life. So relax and think about something good. It's so easy.

Physical relaxation

Sometimes we need to relax physically. Negative experience from the situations we find ourselves in and the emotions we experience often remain in our body. One form of physical release from this is the following: close all the windows in the car or house and scream as loud as you can. Hitting a pillow or bed with all your might is another harmless method.

Playing a variety of sports or going for a brisk walk will lead to the same results. I once experienced a terrible pain in my shoulder that lasted a day or two. I tried to ignore it, but it didn't go away. Then I asked myself: “What’s going on, what’s the matter? What annoys me? I couldn't find the answer, so I said to myself, “Well, let's see.”

I placed two large pillows on the bed and began hitting them as hard as I could. After the twelfth blow, I knew exactly what was annoying me. Everything was clear, and I began to hit the pillows even harder and, thus, freed myself from the feeling of irritation. When I finished, I felt much lighter, and the next day the pain completely disappeared.

Liberation from the past

Many of my patients say that they cannot be happy now because they were traumatized in the past. Because they didn't do something they should have done. Because they don't have Furthermore what they valued most in the world. Because they have been hurt and cannot love; something unpleasant happened earlier and they remember it. Because once they did something terrible and curse themselves for it. Because they can neither forgive nor forget,

Constantly remembering your past means only hurting yourself. Those who are guilty before us - they don’t care. “They” don’t even know the extent of our pain. Therefore, there is no point in concentrating your thoughts on the past. It is gone and cannot be changed. But we can change our attitude to him.

Exercise “liberation from the past”

Let us consider the past only as a memory. If you remember what you wore in the third grade, then this memory will be without any emotional assessment. The same can be said about all events in your past.

As we free ourselves, we become able to use all our mental strength in the present moment. We can change for the better. Again, watch your reaction. What will you need to do to achieve this? How willing or ready are you to let go of your past? What is your resistance level?

Forgiveness

Our next step with you is forgiveness. Forgiveness is the answer to all questions and problems. I know from own experience that when we have problems in life, no matter what nature, it means that we need to forgive someone.

Love- the only answer to any of our problems, and the road to such a state is through forgiveness. Forgiveness dissolves resentment. There are several ways.

Exercise “dissolving resentment”

Sit somewhere quiet, relax. Imagine that you are in a darkened theater and there is a small stage in front of you. Put on stage the person you need to forgive (the person you hate most in the world). This person may be alive or dead, and your hatred may be both past and present.

When you see this person clearly, imagine that something good is happening to him, something that means something good to him great importance. Picture him smiling and happy. Hold this image in your mind for a few minutes, and then let it disappear.

Then, when the person you want to forgive leaves the stage, put yourself there. Imagine that only good things happen to you. Imagine yourself happy and smiling. And know that there is enough goodness in the universe for all of us.

This exercise dissolves the dark clouds of accumulated resentment. Some people will find this exercise very difficult. Every time you do it, you can draw in your imagination different people. Do this exercise once a day for a month and see how much easier your life becomes.

Mental Visualization Exercise

Here's another very good exercise. Imagine yourself as a small child (5-6 years old). Look deep into this child's eyes. Try to see the deep longing and understand that this longing is for love for you. Reach out and hug this little baby, hold him close to your chest. Tell him how much you love him. Tell him that you admire his intelligence, and if he makes mistakes, then it’s okay, everyone makes them.

Promise him that you will always come to his aid if necessary. Now let the child become very small, the size of a pea. Place it in your heart. Let him settle there. When you look down, you will see his little face and you will be able to give him all your love, which is so important to him.

Now imagine your mother when she was 4-5 years old, scared and hungry for love. Extend your hands to her and tell her how much you love her. Tell her that she can count on you no matter what. When she calms down and feels safe, place her in your heart.

Now imagine your father as a little boy of 3-4 years old, he is also very afraid of something and cries loudly, inconsolably. You will see tears rolling down his face. You now know how to calm small children. Hold him to your chest and feel his trembling body. Calm him down. Let him feel your love. Tell him that you will always be there for him.

When his tears dry, may he also become very tiny. Place it in your heart with you and your mother. Love them all, for there is nothing more sacred than love for little children. There is enough love in your heart to heal our entire planet. But let's heal ourselves first. Feel the warmth spreading throughout your body. Softness and tenderness. Let this precious feeling begin to change your life.

My schedule

My day usually goes by in the following way: When I wake up in the morning, before I open my eyes, I give thanks for everything I have. After my shower, I meditate and pray for about half an hour. After morning exercises(15 minutes). Sometimes I do gymnastics along with the 6 o'clock morning program on TV.

My breakfast consists of fruit and herbal tea. I again thank Mother Earth for sending me food. Before lunch, I go to the mirror and do exercises: I either say them or sing them. These are statements like:

  • Louise, you are beautiful and I love you.
  • This is the most beautiful day of my life.
  • Everything you need to know will come to you.
  • Everything is fine.

For lunch I usually eat a big salad. Once again, I bless my food and give thanks. Sometime during the day I listen to a tape of affirmations. For dinner I eat steamed vegetables and porridge. Sometimes chicken or fish. Simple food is best for my body. In the evening I read or study. When I go to bed, I mentally remember the past day and bless it. I say I'll sleep well and wake up in the morning for have a nice day. Sounds strange, doesn't it?

Well, how do you start your day? What do you say or think in the morning when you wake up? I remember the time when, waking up in the morning, I thought: “Oh my God, I have to wake up again. Another day". And I got exactly the day I imagined. One trouble after another. Now, before I open my eyes, I give thanks for good dream and for everything good in my life.

About work

Some of us, dissatisfied with our chosen career, constantly think:

  • I can't stand my job.
  • I hate my job.
  • I don't make enough money.
  • I'm not appreciated at work.
  • I just don't know what to do.

These are negative thoughts that bring you a lot of harm. How do you expect to find Good work, if you think like that all the time? This is called approaching the problem from the wrong end. If you currently have a job that you hate for some reason, you need to do the following.

Start by blessing your real job, because it is a necessary milestone on your path. You are now where your life beliefs. So, start blessing everything about your work: the building you work in, the elevator, the rooms, the furniture and equipment, the people you interact with there.

If you want to leave this job, then constantly tell yourself that you are releasing this job with love and giving it to a person who will be absolutely happy in it. And know that in reality, many people aspire to the position you occupy at work.

“I am open and ready to accept work that would use my capabilities and talents. This new job will allow me to realize all my Creative skills and will satisfy me." If someone at work bothers you, bless that person every time you think about them.

Although we do not choose this, it is important to know that each of us has a little of Hitler and a little of Jesus Christ... If such a person is critical, imagine him as a person who praises everyone: if he is cruel, tell yourself that he is gentle and fair. If you see only the good in people, then they will show you their wonderful qualities, regardless of how they behave with others.

© Louise Hay. Heal your life. The power is within us. - M., 1996

How to change for the better? The desire to develop is inherent in humanity by nature, and the desire for positive changes is inherent in everyone literally evolutionarily. The difference is at what stage a person begins to ask the question “how can I change for the better?” Someone is pushed to such changes by failures and criticism of others, and then the desire for improvement is defensive reaction, a way to avoid punishment, bullying or public ignorance.

Someone changes for the sake of a certain person(to be liked, to earn respect, to build relationships) or relationships (to accept criticism important person and choosing to make certain changes in yourself to maintain meaningful relationships). Some people are inspired by other people's examples, while others are tired of the boring, gray vanity. New travels, acquaintances, films, illnesses, disasters, breakups - these are all strong incentives to start changes. Leading the list of reasons that force people to change is fear, most often the fear of loss or deprivation of the opportunity to get what they want.

The concentration and direction of changes depend on the area requiring them and the global nature of the solution. If one person has to change his place of residence and occupation in order to realize his dream (and this is a thoughtful path that brings visible results improvement), then how can a person change for the better (in own character, the flow of life and interaction with people), simply updating your hairstyle or wardrobe remains a mystery.

To solve each problem there are own methods. Therefore, before you mindlessly follow the advice of ten steps to change yourself, try to understand exactly what qualities you want to change, which ones to improve, to what extent and in what direction you want and are ready to move, what you need for this and what resources you already have you have. And give in to fashion trends improving yourself when your life suits you is, to say the least, a stupid act, since in the process of change you can lose your old life that completely suited you.

How can you change your character for the better?

It consists of many habits, developed reactions and ways of responding, so it is not possible to completely change it. Trying to simultaneously get rid of all the qualities that you consider negative and all the habits that somehow interfere with your life is simply an impossible task. Having shouldered such a load, you can hold out for a week, and then fall back to your previous state, if not in an aggravated form. Break it up global task into components, and work on one or more qualities at the same time, gradually incorporating the rest when you have mastered the first.

How can a person change for the better if he has no starting point for action, i.e. understanding who he is and his inner spiritual world. The solution to any problem begins with study; in the event of a change in character, the need to immerse yourself in the world of your own experiences becomes categorical. The first question along the way of this research will be about the reasons for change. Analyze what events are pushing you towards this. Changes made out of a sense of love and self-care will bring beneficial consequences (reducing the tendency to irritation will protect you from heart problems, developing the ability to refuse will give you more time for yourself and communicating with loved ones, training perseverance will help you complete a project). At the same time, if you decided to reshape your character for the convenience of others, then this situation will not make you feel better, and the feeling of violence against your own psyche will remain and may return to you in the form of psychosomatics (becoming compliant at the request of others, you will be overwhelmed with their requests , increasing rigidity in order to prove something to someone can turn your friends away from you, and outwardly good-natured communication with those who betrayed you is fraught with the development of hypertension and peptic ulcers).

Listen carefully to why you are changing and look at the results, for whom it will be easier and more joyful.

To change for the better in character, you need to maintain a constant enough high level happiness and interest in your own life. Review your prohibitive beliefs and throw out half of them (staying up because you have to cook a meal, not picking up the last piece of candy, giving up going to the movies to clean the house - these are all examples of things that can bring you pieces of happiness and feeling good, but you will only lose false beliefs that this is impossible). Look every day for what will bring you joy, make sure that your life is filled with activities, hobbies, and entertainment that you enjoy and are not popular or approved by your friends. Good character does not imply complete adjustment to the world, but it definitely includes understanding one’s needs, since this is the only way to understand and accept the differences of others.

How to force yourself to change for the better? Don't put off achieving what's important to you, justifying it as others' priority now, or work on your perseverance. Don't work on changing yourself, but change your life in your direction. You will not be able to become a convenient copy that fits into the given standards. There will always be those who don’t love you and you are free to compete with them, fight, not communicate, or look for common ground. There will always be places where you are out of touch, and you are free to whine and stay there, leave to look for others or create your own. The world is plastic, and self-acceptance helps to find organic ways to fulfill needs, in addition to reshaping one’s own personality.

How can a girl change for the better?

When a crisis breaks out in a relationship or a girl walks around for a week with a silent and dissatisfied face, and the relationship becomes cooler, guys begin to look for ways to change for the better. The first thing to understand is to prefer action, and the sooner the better, rather than carry out serious Scientific research this problem.

A common mistake guys make when making changes is that they completely focus their attention on the girl’s interests, trying to please or even predict her desires. Such tactics can help significantly. If you haven’t paid any attention to it before, most often it doesn’t bring results. To make a girl more comfortable and interesting with you, you need to upgrade own life and abilities. So, instead of constantly annoying your companion, get busy - read a book from a new area for you, sign up for courses, play sports, discover a new hobby. A person who does not stand still, develops, knows what he wants, attracts attention. Expanding the circle own interests, it will be easier for you to understand the girl, more topics for conversations and reasons to spend time together. Self-development is a labor-intensive and time-consuming way to improve yourself in the eyes of a girl, but it is more reliable than a gift of a bouquet.

Keep track of more than just development inner world, but also behind his appearance. Take care of clean and tidy clothing, regular hygiene procedures, pay special attention to your health (adjust your regime, diet, pastime), exercise different types(beautiful muscles, of course, delight, but agility, ability to handle different types of transport, accuracy will make a girl look with admiring eyes).

How can a girl change for the better? Look for the positive in everything and tune in to this wave. Good mood, the ability to cheer up, get out of unpleasant situation with humor - those qualities that women really value in men. And of course, do not forget to take into account the wishes of your companion, because if she voiced a request to be late less often, then the first thing you should work on is your own. Girls usually make it clear what they want from guys, do not neglect her words, because before expressing criticism out loud, she has already remained somewhat silent, justified, endured and did everything possible in her life so as not to make claims against you.

How to change for the better for a guy?

Girls, striving for constant success, focus their activities on two factors: own desires and the desires of the guys. Usually, in order to become better for a guy, the first thing is external changes. Becoming more feminine, changing worn-out jeans to an airy dress, learning to walk exhilaratingly in stiletto heeled pumps - this is all an arsenal that women actively use to increase their own attractiveness in the eyes of men. Indeed, appearance plays an important role in the formation and generation of interest, but subsequently one gets used to appearance, and a man will exchange any beautiful doll for a woman with whom he feels comfortable and cozy.

Internal change is a more serious and labor-intensive process compared to external transformations. Putting on a dress and looking feminine is a task of several hours, but remaining feminine in your actions, regardless of your wardrobe, is a whole art, to which many trainings are now devoted. But usually guys don't need that much. They are interested in living and real girls who know themselves, their skills, strengths and weak sides, they know what they want. Inner fullness, reliability, the ability to support in a difficult situation and the ability to understand attract guys and make them stay close.

Know yourself, practice own development, accept yourself, this world and the guy who is next to you as you are, and you will become better not only for him, you will feel how you have become more comfortable and joyful in living with yourself, how the world around you has begun to take care of you. Become more open to the world, develop spontaneity and try to replace criticism and prejudice with research interest in the opinions and lives of other people - such changes will not leave others indifferent and will give space for the realization of your inner space.